Is this a good Xmas present for my boyfriend? Or have I gone overboard?

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Actually, it says you are from Notting Hill so unless you are someones live in housekeeper, I am guessing that the cost is pretty negligible to you so I suppose it isn't as much of a big deal.

Reply 21

tinshed

yeah it's a great thing to arrange if you are planing to propose to him at the end of these few days or you were celebrating a happy wedding anniversary. otherwise if someone did this to me after a few month i would be surprised. the only reason why this is not a good idea is if you can imagine his expectation is going to be very high for next x-mas/birthday/holiday... if you do things like this often then soon you will run out of ideas. it's a bit ott but good luck!

Reply 22

linkdapink

My boyfriend got me a really big present last year, and I felt really embarrassed with what I had got him (two £60 tickets, I got him a £30 game). I then put a limit on this years spending. I have a feeling that he's doubled it at least.

However, what you've got was probably in excess of £300? £400? £500? I can't remember what you said you've got exactly... but I would be VERY freaked out if that was me. And VERY annoyed if we said we wouldn't get anything.

Reply 23

xmarilynx

Original post by Tyraell

Why not cook him dinner, give him a massage and then use the underwear? It's not really an xmas gift, but it's still a nice gesture.

This - it's a great treat for him but doesn't go over the top and/or break your agreement and make him feel awkward.

Although your present is amazing, I think you risk hurting his "masculine pride" a bit by taking control like that and paying for everything. Since you've agreed no presents that means he will have got little or nothing for you, which means a nice gesture like the above poster suggested are great but OTT presents just make the receiver feel awkward and inferior, particularly one as expensive as yours. If you've already paid for it and can't/don't want to cancel, then I suggest next time you see him you warn him with something like "I know we said no presents, but I couldn't help but want to treat you so I've got a little surprise planned :wink:

" - so he knows to expect something, which will reduce the awkwardness, but your present still stays a surprise.

Reply 24

Hooj

You'll have him at Hotel room!

Reply 25

esachica

Like literally everyone else has said, if I were him, I'd feel awful about not getting you anything! To the point where it'd could dampen his mood (though I'm sure you could change that :P) Perhaps pre warn him and give him a chance? Just an idea :smile:

Very cute idea though!

Reply 26

chemical_bex

Seems like a bit much. I mean...a couple of months

If my boyfriend did that for me and we had agreed no presents, I'd feel awful.

Reply 27

fallen angel9

I really don't like people making a fuss on my behalf and I'd feel like **** for not having anything to give in return. But that's just me? :dontknow:

I'd still be appreciative and grateful though. :h:

Reply 28

Love.Angel.Music.Baby

hmm, my bf wouldn't be freaked but then we've been together for nearly 3 yrs. If you've already arranged no presents, then he'll probably feel guilty, and sorry if its already been asked but, how old are you? Cos that seems like a pretty mature thing to do if you've only been together for a couple of months if you were, say, 16. All in all I'm sure he'll love it!

Reply 29

Arielle

Original post by Love.Angel.Music.Baby

I'm 18 & he's 19.

So I'm guessing I've taken things a little too far... I thought of it initially though because he'll be staying at my house (meeting the parents, family etc) so really, I wanted to spend a night alone with him and since it's around Christmas and all, I thought I'd turn it into a treat. Do you reckon if I explain this to him, he'll understand and won't feel bad? And I will definitely be adamant that I wasn't expecting anything and am completely happy with receiving nothing from him.

Reply 30

un-besito

It all sounds very nice and I'm sure he'll appreciate it, but I don't really think it's fair if you don't give him any hint that you have got him a present, because if you've both agreed not to, he might feel really guilty about not having got you anything. Also, if you said he's a 'no fuss' kind of guy, he might find it all a bit uncomfortable. However, you know him better than us :smile:

Reply 31

Love.Angel.Music.Baby

Original post by Arielle

The gesture is really sweet but I think its probably a little fast, I can't know this for certain, only you can gauge the state of your relationship. Maybe he'd be a little freaked out, spending that much money is a big thing and he might feel pushed into something a little more serious than he was planning/ready for. Is there any way you could cancel and get a refund, for all accounts, still surprise him with sexy underwear and a massage but its a little more low key in your bedroom! Save the lavish gift for your 1 year anniversary? I mean with a gift like that after only 2 months, its gonna be hard to top!!

Hope that's helpful :smile:

Reply 32

OceanSoul

I would like it if my boyfriend came up with such a surprise; but if you've just been dating for a few months and I mean; you're the girlfriend, I wouldn't book a room in a 5 star hotel. You can cook him a meal yourself, and wear your new underwear when he's over at your place instead of going to a hotel.

It would really be disappointing if he reacts negatively if you go through all that fuss for him. It's a nice idea though. You can keep it for next Christmas :smile:

Reply 33

ThePants999

Original post by Arielle

Yeah, if you say that sort of stuff I think it'll be OK - make clear it's not "you getting him a present", it's "you wanting to spend a night alone with him and turning it into a treat for both of you". Maybe add in "since he's coming all this way" to really reinforce that you're not expecting anything back.

Reply 34

Arielle

Maybe if I say it's not a Christmas present, but a getaway from my parents? Would that put him at more ease?

Reply 35

veux

I'd be all wow :biggrin:

and thanks :biggrin:

but I'm not the sort of person to turn down other people's generosity or feel guilty about it.

Overboard.

Original post by Arielle

My boyfriend and I live quite far apart but he's coming to stay with me just after Christmas for a few days and I thought I would surprise him even though we said no Christmas presents, just each other's company sort of thing.

We haven't been together for very long (couple of months) but I booked a superior room in a five star hotel, a massage, romantic dinner at a top restaurant and some nice underwear (hehe). In my head it was a great idea, but he's a bit of a "no-fuss" person (which is why we said no presents) and we haven't even been together that long and I know it sounds stupid, but I'm worried he'll be like "WHAT THE F**K?" And I'm panicking loads!

So my question is, if you're a boy (or a girl, I guess) would you be freaked out and think woah, overboard! Jesus! or would you think it was just a nice gesture?

(I don't think my boyfriend has TSR, but hope you like it if you have :wink:

)

I think he'd really appreciate it :smile:

After all, you're not technically buying him a present; it's a present that will be enjoyed by both of you together :smile:

Furthermore, you are still, in a way, keeping in line with his wish - you will be together and enjoying each other's company, but you'll be doing so in 'style' (as much as I hate to use that word in such a context).

Of course that's not to say that you couldn't have had just as nice a time together at home, or anywhere else for that matter. But that doesn't mean you can't pamper your bf and the relationship you have together once in a while :smile:

And I bet he'll be so grateful that he'll consciously make a big effort to make sure you have a wonderful time :smile:

I hope you have a very lovely evening indeed!

EDIT: P.s. Don't worry, he's not going to freak out or think things are getting too serious :smile:

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 38

stefk93

In my opinion this sounds like something a guy would do for a girl. If i was him i would feel very, very awkward becuase its kind of demasculating him.

Reply 39

Reformed2010

Original post by Arielle

)

1. What the hell! I know couples who have been together for 25 years and don't spend that much on a single present. How much did that cost you? Damn some one is earning...

2. His going to feel slightly guilty that his present won't even come near yours.

However it is still great that you wanted to make him happy and have gone through such lengths. I'm sure once you two get the 5 star bedroom to good use, he'll long forgive you upstanding him. :wink: