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Problem with parents Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter

    My father is an alcoholic and has been for a very long time. This has caused lots of problems in my home. Firstly he is drunk most of the day, he is unemployed due to his alcoholism and in his sober spells when he does find a job, he does not go to it and instead chooses to become drunk again. When he has consumed a lot of alcohol (usually whiskey or vodka) he doesn't interact with the rest of the family, which is me,my mum and my little brother. If we do try and speak to him he just swears or doesn't respond at all and he constantly swears at me under his breath. My mum was going to divorce but did not because he had "nowhere to go", so all he does is watch t.v,sleep and create a mess in the kitchen after his failed attempt to cook anything which my mum has to clean.

    He has hit my mum before and the police where called but he says he didn't touch her, the police could see he had drank whiskey so did arrest him but nothing came of it. He constantly lies, another time he punched me because I didn't let him watch t.v, I told my mum and he said he had done nothing and that I had started it, even though I hadn't.

    When he is sober, if one of us tries to speak with him about his problem he doesn't listen and is not willing to seek any help from doctors either. He also is very irritable and I often feel I cannot talk to him whilst he is sober, as I would upset him. We argue over small things, which when he is drunk he does but when I do it and he is sober, he tells me not to, and when I remind him that he does it when drunk he doesn't care. He is very hypocritical too, sometimes he just ignores me and doesn't speak to me even if it is just a little argument.

    The next problem is with my mum, she shouts at my dad when he's not sober, but when he is she ignores everything and sides with him, so I go from being the man of the house to nothing. She shouts at me whenever I argue with him, even when I am right she tells me to stop whilst doing nothing to him, whom she hated so much when drunk. If I try to talk to my brother about this he tells me to shut up and that I am "too girly" but I listen to everything he has to say and all his problems. If I try to speak to my mum about these problems she listens fora bit then becomes uninterested and tells me she works hard and doesn't need this.

    Oh he is usually sober for around three months where he consumes no alcohol whatsoever,then just becomes pissed for another 6 months (he can't seem to control his addiction. I can't revise for my exams either when this happens because of all the noise and stress I have.

    Sorry if a bit long,but I needed to get that off my chest any advice would be greatly appreciated.
    • #2

    Have you discussed your feelings with your mother? You should maybe let her know what your thinking and why. Are other family or relatives away of this going on in your home life? If not, maybe you should confide in them. Failing this I would advise you to seek advice from a website called this is abuse. they may be able to put you in contact with someone who can help.

    If you think your father poses a risk to yourself or your little brother maybe you should consider talking to someone at his school? You don't have to live like this. ultimately make sure you dont put yourself in any risk by seeking out help! Stay safe!
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Updated: December 18, 2010
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