I had an undiagnosed eating disorder for around a year three years ago, before I got found out. These last 7 months, I believe I have been suffering depression and as sick as it sounds, a part of me wants my eating disorder back because I have a desperate selfish want to know and feel that people care.. :-/ pathetic I know. Some days, I eat **** and feel fine and then some other days I almost like dare myself not to eat and feel good if I don't...
Anyway today, I went out with my two best mates and I was feeling quite depressed, and I also felt really ugly...I went to the loos in the club and made myself sick (not a lot)....I dont know why I did it...it is the first time I have done it in months,
I feel so ****ed up right now :-/
I don't know what I expect you guys to say...but needed to let it out..
- Thread Starter
- 19-12-2010 02:33
- 19-12-2010 03:03
It sounds like you are still recovering from it all, and every so often you slip, which is ok if you have a bad day, just remember, you can start again tomorrow x
Sorry I couldn't be more help x
- 19-12-2010 03:07
That sounds so horrible You poor thing. I've had an ED now for 3 years, so I know how you feel. Its not selfish to want your ED back, for me it is like having a sense of security, and identity.
I'm sorry you made yourself sick in the club, I've done that so so many times I don't know why... I just get the urge.
You aren't ****ed up, you just need some help. Christ I probably sound like the biggest hypocrit ever, I need help too. Maybe we should get help together?
I hope you're ok