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Cannot for the life of me figure out whether he's gay Watch

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    I met this guy, and he's small and effeminate, has loads of friends who are girls, enjoys latin dancing and doesn't mind being called things like "doll" and "babes"

    However:

    as well as my gaydar being so obviously ****, i am also more or less unable to work out when people are coming onto me? (especially if i thought they were gay!)

    so the question is...is he gay, or simply effeminate?

    tbh, this is a question that cannot be resolved over the internet, so i'm entertaining any amusing stories from people with equally awful gaydars
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    and one question - is there any way i can subtly find out his sexual orientation?
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    Not sure.
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    ...ask him?
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    Drop hints.
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    A lot of guys act like queers because they think it's cool.
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    (Original post by Rzc)
    ...ask him?
    would it not be slightly strange if i literally just asked if he was gay?
    if he isn't he might be offended
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    Ask him if he enjoys Ricky Martin.
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    (Original post by xnatalie01x)
    Drop hints.
    like?
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    I'm gay. Not really effeminate or camp or anything like that though. I ended up with a facebook inbox message from a girl I know just pretty much flat out asking me if I was, followed by another from a different one the week after!

    Obviously I'm not saying you should do that, but since I knew I'm gay I didn't mind. If it turns out he's straight you'll just end up offending him, and even maybe so if he actually is gay. Depends how well you know him really.
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    i would test it out by just coming onto him or something, but i don't want him to be like "lol you idiot, did you not work out that i'm blatantly gay LOLOLOL loser"

    and nobody likes being rejected at christmas!
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    (Original post by fretter778)
    I'm gay. Not really effeminate or camp or anything like that though. I ended up with a facebook inbox message from a girl I know just pretty much flat out asking me if I was, followed by another from a different one the week after!

    Obviously I'm not saying you should do that, but since I knew I'm gay I didn't mind. If it turns out he's straight you'll just end up offending him, and even maybe so if he actually is gay. Depends how well you know him really.
    hmm, not well at all....i'm guessing "secual orientation" is one of those things that comes under the "actually know you to some extent" bracket

    out of interest, have you ever had guys asking if you're gay, or do they tend to figure it out from the outset?
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    (Original post by theths)
    would it not be slightly strange if i literally just asked if he was gay?
    if he isn't he might be offended
    Ask if he has a girlfriend then?
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    Maybe he's bi? :dontknow:
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    (Original post by theths)
    hmm, not well at all....i'm guessing "secual orientation" is one of those things that comes under the "actually know you to some extent" bracket

    out of interest, have you ever had guys asking if you're gay, or do they tend to figure it out from the outset?
    What I meant with that last point was if you ask them and you're already pretty much good friends then he probably won't mind too much as you trust each other etc. If you're pretty much a stranger to him and you go around asking him personal questions like that he's more likely to be offended.

    One of my male friends asked if I was 'actually' gay when I was joking around one day, but it wasn't an out of the blue thing like the other two girls. Afterwards, any girls or boys who have found out now tend to be pretty shocked to some extent, as like I said it's really not obvious I'm gay. It's not something I set out to express all the time.
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    (Original post by fretter778)
    What I meant with that last point was if you ask them and you're already pretty much good friends then he probably won't mind too much as you trust each other etc. If you're pretty much a stranger to him and you go around asking him personal questions like that he's more likely to be offended.

    One of my male friends asked if I was 'actually' gay when I was joking around one day, but it wasn't an out of the blue thing like the other two girls. Afterwards, any girls or boys who have found out now tend to be pretty shocked to some extent, as like I said it's really not obvious I'm gay. It's not something I set out to express all the time.
    Ohh I see. Well yeah, I only just met him, but we get along/he's attempted to invite me out with his "guys and girls" a few times, etc.
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    Say to one of his close friend that x girl fancies him, she'd probably tell or hint that he was gay then.
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    My manager asked me if I was gay once.

    I can't really remember why or what I'd said or done that made him have to ask.

    It didn't bother me at all so if you really want to know just ask.
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    (Original post by Rzc)
    Ask if he has a girlfriend then?
    genius. hopefully he won't think i'm a retard for not realising he was gay, but otherwise this is a good idea
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    http://www.profilebrand.com/funny-pi...8_gay-test.jpg
    Thank me later.
 
 
 
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