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The guy I "like" lives in another country Watch

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    I met this guy in an online forum, and we've been chatting for a couple of months now. Right from the start, we were both really flirty. We both said to eachother that if we lived near enough each other, we'd probably be a couple. But sadly, he lives countries away from me . It's still lovely talking to him, he's seen my pictures and called me beautiful, and I've seen his and called him handsome (which he is, though he's very modest, which I find sweet).

    I feel sad now, because I can't understand why I can't find anyone like this in real life. Guys always either don't notice me, only friend me, or they're just nasty to me. You could say I'm very unlucky in love. But this online guy is nothing but charming to me, goodlooking too as a plus. I think about him all the time. And yes I am fully aware of the possibility that he may well not be who he says he is, which is even more depressing to think. I just hate how everything has to be too good to be true for me, nothing's ever ****ing real :sad:.

    I'm not really sure why I'm posting this, as I don't really know what people could say about this. I suppose I just wanted to get this off my mind in written words. Anyone had similar issues?
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    wait till you can meet him, go on holiday, tell him to come over, but meet him.
    I've been in a similar situation, it's been more than 1 year now, and I still haven't met him. I thought he was exactly the kind of guy I wanted to meet, so knowing that he was so ****ing far away was depressing, but after a few months I learnt how to just forget about it and move on. I still talk to him, and I still hope something'll happen, because I know I'm probably moving to england next year, and thats where he lives, but i also know i can't stop living my life here waiting for him.
    So, my advice would be : if you or him plan to move to the other's country, cling to it, maybe it'll worth it. If neither of you plan to move, then I'd advise you to forget about him, look for guys around you, cause it doesnt worth it. If you're never going to live in the same country then I doubt you'll ever be in a relationship....
    Bt maybe I'm wrong.
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    (Original post by littlepotatoe)
    wait till you can meet him, go on holiday, tell him to come over, but meet him.
    I've been in a similar situation, it's been more than 1 year now, and I still haven't met him. I thought he was exactly the kind of guy I wanted to meet, so knowing that he was so ****ing far away was depressing, but after a few months I learnt how to just forget about it and move on. I still talk to him, and I still hope something'll happen, because I know I'm probably moving to england next year, and thats where he lives, but i also know i can't stop living my life here waiting for him.
    So, my advice would be : if you or him plan to move to the other's country, cling to it, maybe it'll worth it. If neither of you plan to move, then I'd advise you to forget about him, look for guys around you, cause it doesnt worth it. If you're never going to live in the same country then I doubt you'll ever be in a relationship....
    Bt maybe I'm wrong.
    Thank you for your story. He did say he may come to my country for a year abroad as part of his uni course, but that's not really set in stone so I'm not sure what's gonna happen or when. I am trying not to set my hopes up too much, it being a hard situation. I will keep considering what to do.
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    Does anyone know what they would do in my situation?
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    Anyone?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Anyone?
    Yes, well I can tell you if you don't meet up with him you'll regret it and wonder what he's like in person. I say you guys should meet up y'know whenever. He might turn out to be the exact kind of guy you're looking for so there's nothing to lose and everything to gain( since you've known him for so long).

    Good Luck.
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    (Original post by Casshern1456)
    Yes, well I can tell you if you don't meet up with him you'll regret it and wonder what he's like in person. I say you guys should meet up y'know whenever. He might turn out to be the exact kind of guy you're looking for so there's nothing to lose and everything to gain( since you've known him for so long).

    Good Luck.
    Thanks I think I need to talk to him a bit more before considering really meeting up with him, but I won't rule it out yet.
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    The main thing I'm worried about, is that what if he turns out to be one of those crazy, grooming, psycho, rapist, murderers that you hear about in the news? To be honest, those stories are putting me off going ahead.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I met this guy in an online forum, and we've been chatting for a couple of months now. Right from the start, we were both really flirty. We both said to eachother that if we lived near enough each other, we'd probably be a couple. But sadly, he lives countries away from me . It's still lovely talking to him, he's seen my pictures and called me beautiful, and I've seen his and called him handsome (which he is, though he's very modest, which I find sweet).

    I feel sad now, because I can't understand why I can't find anyone like this in real life. Guys always either don't notice me, only friend me, or they're just nasty to me. You could say I'm very unlucky in love. But this online guy is nothing but charming to me, goodlooking too as a plus. I think about him all the time. And yes I am fully aware of the possibility that he may well not be who he says he is, which is even more depressing to think. I just hate how everything has to be too good to be true for me, nothing's ever ****ing real :sad:.

    I'm not really sure why I'm posting this, as I don't really know what people could say about this. I suppose I just wanted to get this off my mind in written words. Anyone had similar issues?

    speaking to them in real life is never the same and far more awkward. but i know what you mean, it's tough.
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    What are the countries involved? If both are in Europe, Ryanair/EasyJet/Vueling/Jet2.com/Monarch/bmibaby/other do miracles. It's worth it, isn't it?
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    I can sympathise. I've met quite a few people from online (20 or so) and they all were all perfectly genuine, and if not quite as they appeared online, they were at least very similar. Obviously things like body language etc aren't present unless your webcamming, so things can take a different meaning online, which might mean you have a slightly different perspective of their personality.

    However I would say, by all means, meet up. Just have it on your terms, especially if you're a girl, and bring a friend along. Go into the meet with an open mind, not thinking "I'd really like to get with this guy". Even if first impressions are different to what you expect, give it a little while and it's quite likely you'll see in them what you saw online.

    I'm in a similar situation with the genders reversed, so hopefully my advice isn't far off
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    (Original post by SergioMZ)
    What are the countries involved? If both are in Europe, Ryanair/EasyJet/Vueling/Jet2.com/Monarch/bmibaby/other do miracles. It's worth it, isn't it?
    Yes, we're both in Europe. I will consider it.
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    And why did I get negged for my original post? Is it really my fault that every guy I meet in real life is crap?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yes, we're both in Europe. I will consider it.
    My boyfriend is Dutch, and I can fully relate to the feelings you're having now about meeting up with him. I was pretty scared about meeting someone off the internet at first, but we spent a couple of months talking on msn, then we started webcamming. We met about 4 months after we met online; it was as if I'd known him for years.

    He came to me first, as he is slightly older and as I didn't want to go to Holland for the first time on my own, and my parents were there as back up (scared the crap out of him, but hey; I needed the lift to the airport). I was slightly scared right up till I got up to him and gave him a hug. We've been together over two years now and we use Ryanair/BMI/Eurolines (coach) to get to each other every 5-10 weeks. Without Ryanair especially (despite all the bad press they get), we wouldn't be together now.

    It's hard, but if you think he might be the guy for you, it's worth at least giving it a chance! You never know what you might get out of it.
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    I have been in your situation before. And it only lead to tears and heartache. When you go online, you can escape from your life, be who you want to be......you develop a fantasy in your head. When it all came crashing down, it took me a long long time to get over it.

    Unless if you can realistically meet (which might actually make it harder if you hit it off but then can't be "together", I really think you should distance yourself. Or at least come to terms with the fact that it's only talking.
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    You've developed an infatuation on who is probably an old, fat Turkish bloke sitting in his hut and having a right giggle at your expense.

    My advice? Get over it m8.
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    I'll probably keep talking to him at least just for fun, but be cautious of my feelings and just go with the flow of things. The feeling to take things further or not can come in time, I suppose. Meanwhile, I need to maybe learn how to attract guys in real life (which seems so impossible :emo: )
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    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__DrJI7mTHQ#t=0m37s
 
 
 
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