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How do I let him down gently? Watch

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    Okay, this guy is in my group of friends, so we've known each other for like a year and a half, and we get on pretty well. The thing is, he likes me and has done since we met. I didn't realise this at first (although everyone used to try and tell me) and I had a boyfriend the whole time anyway so it didn't really matter.

    I've been single since September and since then he's definitely amped up the flirting, but I still thought we were just friends, because he's started university anyway. However, he keeps inviting me to his house and to parties and stuff and I don't like him in that way so I make up excuses and pretend I'm busy, but after asking me three days in a row, last night I went over just to hang out because I felt bad. I made sure to sit at the other end of the sofa and stuff but he kept shuffling nearer and ended up with his arm around me and I didn't like to tell him to get off.

    He asked if I want to hang out today and I was like ermm I might be busy. How do I make sure he gets the message that I don't like him without being too much of a *****, as I totally get I've given him mixed messages by accident.


    TLDR: Friend likes me, I don't like him, what do I do?
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    Tell him you've converted to Islam and pre-marital relationships are forbidden. Easy.
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    Just tell him straight - say you don't want to make things uncomfortable but you like him as a mate and nothing more. Dont do the whole "its not you, its me" crap because it obviously is him, thats why you dont want to get on it. Just be completely honest - you think he's cool or you wouldnt want to spend time with him, just make it clear you want nothing more. Best of luck
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    Just tell him the truth. We like to know if a girl isn't interested, so just tell him and be nice about it.
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    break it him, say i love being friends, just friends.
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    (Original post by Steezy)
    Just tell him the truth. We like to know if a girl isn't interested, so just tell him and be nice about it.
    But how do I even bring it up? Should I wait until the next time he texts me something flirty and just be like "I don't really think anything should happen between us"? Or is that coming across big headed. Argh, I hate when this happens
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      Shag him.
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      You need to be bluntly honest with him. It will suck for him at the time but it'll be better. At the moment he thinks he has a chance with you, you need to make him see that this is completely not the case. As I say, it will be crappy for him but in the long run it will be better. Use the immortal line 'I see you as a friend not a boyfriend' and make sure he knows he's been friendzoned well and good. No need to be nasty about it, just sit him down and tell him in a nice way. Throw in how much fun you have hanging out with him BUT... and you'll be fine. It'll keep him in your good books and he'll know his place. He might be cold to you for a while but he'll get over it eventually.
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      (Original post by VioletEyes)
      But how do I even bring it up? Should I wait until the next time he texts me something flirty and just be like "I don't really think anything should happen between us"? Or is that coming across big headed. Argh, I hate when this happens
      Just bring it up next time he says/does something that makes you uncomfortable. Say that it's making you feel uncomfortable because you want to be friends and nothing more.
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      (Original post by VioletEyes)
      But how do I even bring it up? Should I wait until the next time he texts me something flirty and just be like "I don't really think anything should happen between us"? Or is that coming across big headed. Argh, I hate when this happens
      Just bring it up. Just say, I'm not sure if you've got the wrong idea, but you know I only see you as a friend right? You're a nice guy, but I'm not really interested in you in an intimate way. I enjoy being friends with you and like hanging out, but just thought I should let you know in case you get the wrong idea.

      He'll probably come up with some bull**** saying he only saw you as a friend anyway. But he'll cry when you leave.

      But he'll be better off than if you don't tell him and he gets his hopes up.
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      (Original post by hothedgehog)
      You need to be bluntly honest with him. It will suck for him at the time but it'll be better. At the moment he thinks he has a chance with you, you need to make him see that this is completely not the case. As I say, it will be crappy for him but in the long run it will be better. Use the immortal line 'I see you as a friend not a boyfriend' and make sure he knows he's been friendzoned well and good. No need to be nasty about it, just sit him down and tell him in a nice way. Throw in how much fun you have hanging out with him BUT... and you'll be fine. It'll keep him in your good books and he'll know his place. He might be cold to you for a while but he'll get over it eventually.
      (Original post by hattikins)
      Just bring it up next time he says/does something that makes you uncomfortable. Say that it's making you feel uncomfortable because you want to be friends and nothing more.
      (Original post by Steezy)
      Just bring it up. Just say, I'm not sure if you've got the wrong idea, but you know I only see you as a friend right? You're a nice guy, but I'm not really interested in you in an intimate way. I enjoy being friends with you and like hanging out, but just thought I should let you know in case you get the wrong idea.

      He'll probably come up with some bull**** saying he only saw you as a friend anyway. But he'll cry when you leave.

      But he'll be better off than if you don't tell him and he gets his hopes up.


      Thanks guys. It's time like these I wish I wasn't really ridiculously good looking :/ (I kid)

      Guess I'll just have to bite the bullet and put up with some awkwardness then.
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      Just let him dump his DNA in you, then he'll **** off when you've served your purpose
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      Tell him the truth? Surely if you explain how you feel, then he'd understand. If he doesn't, he's being selfish. Just make it clear that you want to stay friends but don't want a relationship
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      the next time he wants you to hang out with him go and then tell him that you dont see him in that way, you may seem like a ***** but you have to be cruel to be kind sometimes it saves him wasting his time and energy in the future on you (no offence but his time is better served persuing someone who may actually like him)
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      Tell him that you're a lesbian.
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      Tell him flat out that you dont want him.


      Every dude has to man up and face rejection every so often. Keeps you on your toes.
     
     
     
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