Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    I would describe my journey from high school to a new sixth form as 'rough' and 'rather windy'. The sixth form I go to contains students who have practically known each from primary school. As an outsider, they seem to be somewhat unwilling to become close friends. We get along, but not up to the point where we would meet outside the insitution.

    I have some great friends outside sixth form who I meet up with regularly, but it takes me a while to get to know people.

    Will university be a struggle for me?
    Is it hard to make friends at university for shy people?
    And does anyone have any tips to have a good student life at university?

    Thank you.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    No. Just have faith. Everyone is different. High school/sixth form, it's all just a postcode lottery. At uni you will meet pots of different people, like minded, outgoing and friendly. Especially at the start, the social structure of first semester of first year is reall different. The chances are the very first person you speak to will become an instant friend and you'll really open up at this time.


    If all else fails...tsr? I'm a shy person and the only action i get is on tsr :sad: getting quoted is like being on the pull. I'm so sad :p:

    Good luck!!

    Oh and i didn't read your post so i'm sprry if this was about something completely unrelated. :dontknow:
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    There are lots of shy people at university the problem is it takes a while for them to find each other.

    At first you might feel a bit out of place because in Freshers Week you just notice the rowdy types, everybody notices the rowdy types, and its easy to come to the conclusion "hmm uni life isnt really for me". But if you stick with it a bit and don't be put off if you feel a bit of an outsider in the first few days.

    If you're a shy type, people give advice like "ah just join everything, do everything" but if you're not into late night boozing and clubbing then you don't have to. If you're in halls, when everybody else from your flat is out, see if there's a communal area with a TV or coffee bit in and check it out, you will probably find someone in there whose quieter and not into the Freshers boozing. Over time you will start to find people like that but remember shy people melt into the background at uni so you don't notice them at first.

    Also you will probably find some of the best friends you make, you won't even know at all in 1st year. You will meet them in later years.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by shygirl92)
    If all else fails...tsr? I'm a shy person and the only action i get is on tsr :sad: getting quoted is like being on the pull. I'm so sad :p:
    ello babe, are you a parking ticket?
    cos you've got 'fine' written all over you
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by MagicNMedicine)
    ello babe, are you a parking ticket?
    cos you've got 'fine' written all over you
    Get yout coat, we're about to pull...and other things
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by shygirl92)
    Get yout coat, we're about to pull...and other things
    Well first you're gonna get down and give me rep.
    Then I'm gonna quote you over and over again.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    no because not alot of people would be friends prior to uni
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by shygirl92)
    No. Just have faith. Everyone is different. High school/sixth form, it's all just a postcode lottery. At uni you will meet pots of different people, like minded, outgoing and friendly. Especially at the start, the social structure of first semester of first year is reall different. The chances are the very first person you speak to will become an instant friend and you'll really open up at this time.


    If all else fails...tsr? I'm a shy person and the only action i get is on tsr :sad: getting quoted is like being on the pull. I'm so sad :p:

    Good luck!!

    Oh and i didn't read your post so i'm sprry if this was about something completely unrelated. :dontknow:
    Aww, thank you for your encouragement. You're a pretty cool person.


    (Original post by MagicNMedicine)
    There are lots of shy people at university the problem is it takes a while for them to find each other.

    At first you might feel a bit out of place because in Freshers Week you just notice the rowdy types, everybody notices the rowdy types, and its easy to come to the conclusion "hmm uni life isnt really for me". But if you stick with it a bit and don't be put off if you feel a bit of an outsider in the first few days.

    If you're a shy type, people give advice like "ah just join everything, do everything" but if you're not into late night boozing and clubbing then you don't have to. If you're in halls, when everybody else from your flat is out, see if there's a communal area with a TV or coffee bit in and check it out, you will probably find someone in there whose quieter and not into the Freshers boozing. Over time you will start to find people like that but remember shy people melt into the background at uni so you don't notice them at first.

    Also you will probably find some of the best friends you make, you won't even know at all in 1st year. You will meet them in later years.
    This is really good advice, thank you. You've given me confidence to be prepared to be "me" in essence when I go to uni. I will bare in mind what you said! Thanks again for the very informed response!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by MagicNMedicine)
    Well first you're gonna get down and give me rep.
    Then I'm gonna quote you over and over again.
    My rep is worth nothing. i'll rep you fae my other account which is badass.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Tulin)
    Aww, thank you for your encouragement. You're a pretty cool person.




    This is really good advice, thank you. You've given me confidence to be prepared to be "me" in essence when I go to uni. I will bare in mind what you said! Thanks again for the very informed response!
    I told you you'd meet 'pots of people'

    :lolwut: i need a slap.

    Good luck and ypu'll be great. Most uni goers are shy. It will bring you out!!!'my xx
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by shygirl92)
    No. Just have faith. Everyone is different. High school/sixth form, it's all just a postcode lottery. At uni you will meet pots of different people, like minded, outgoing and friendly. Especially at the start, the social structure of first semester of first year is reall different. The chances are the very first person you speak to will become an instant friend and you'll really open up at this time.


    If all else fails...tsr? I'm a shy person and the only action i get is on tsr :sad:getting quoted is like being on the pull. I'm so sad :p:

    Good luck!!

    Oh and i didn't read your post so i'm sprry if this was about something completely unrelated. :dontknow:
    I'm on a revision break and reading this has made by day.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Tulin)

    Will university be a struggle for me?
    Is it hard to make friends at university for shy people?
    And does anyone have any tips to have a good student life at university?

    Thank you.
    There are many societies available and there are bound to be other shy people there! I would suggest going around on Fresher's Week and just getting all the leaflets there and deciding later!

    Also, perhaps join some websites and try and meet others destined for the same uni and try and break down the stranger barrier before going!
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Im shy and student life has been great! Your placed in a situation where everyone is new to one another and everyone will be willing to give becoming your friend a chance, so just be yourself and people will like you =]
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    dont worry have faith. Express yourself for who you are and people would most certainly be attracted to you
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by shygirl92)
    No. Just have faith. Everyone is different. High school/sixth form, it's all just a postcode lottery. At uni you will meet pots of different people, like minded, outgoing and friendly. Especially at the start, the social structure of first semester of first year is reall different. The chances are the very first person you speak to will become an instant friend and you'll really open up at this time.


    If all else fails...tsr? I'm a shy person and the only action i get is on tsr :sad: getting quoted is like being on the pull. I'm so sad :p:

    Good luck!!

    Oh and i didn't read your post so i'm sprry if this was about something completely unrelated. :dontknow:
    :perv:
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Tulin)
    I would describe my journey from high school to a new sixth form as 'rough' and 'rather windy'. The sixth form I go to contains students who have practically known each from primary school. As an outsider, they seem to be somewhat unwilling to become close friends. We get along, but not up to the point where we would meet outside the insitution.

    I have some great friends outside sixth form who I meet up with regularly, but it takes me a while to get to know people.

    Will university be a struggle for me?
    Is it hard to make friends at university for shy people?
    And does anyone have any tips to have a good student life at university?

    Thank you.
    I suppose it's different for everyone, but I can be shy and my first semester hasn't been that great tbh :/

    During freshers week our course had two 9:30am lectures and two full days of activities meaning that I missed out on a few nights of going out. After that week I started getting loads of colds or whatever they were and didn't go in for a week because I literally couldn't get out of bed. Flatmates kindly invited me out but I had to reject because I had to be up at 7am or wasn't feeling great, I once had to go in the kitchen and ask them to turn their extremely loud music off at 4am (this was after freshers week), which scarred our friendship for a bit I think.

    Anyway, basically, I missed out on bonding properly with halls friends because they slowly started inviting me out less because I was turning them down so much, and I missed out with course mates because they all got really close and have pretty much cut me out since I haven't been in as much as I should. The last few weeks of term I would cry several times a week, I've become nocturnal and it's been a really tough time. Luckily I've spoken to halls friends about it and we've agreed that they'll invite me out (and me them) every time they do something and I'll get my work, sleeping pattern, and immune system in order so that I go out a lot more than I did in the first semester. As with course mates, the people in my group have been pretty cold with me for a while, and last week made a couple of *****y remarks for some unknown reason (I'm thinking that they're just annoyed because I've missed deadlines and probably don't think I work hard enough or something).

    Sorry this is a really long message and brings down the positivity of the thread but I just hope that no one has to go through what I did. If you get ill try not to stay in bed and let work get behind because trust me, it gets worse.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    I'm a seriously shy person, and I had no problems making friends at uni :-)
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    It's hard to say because every shy person is different. Some make friends despite their shyness and some don't because of their shyness. It's too unpredictable and this kind of issue varies per situation.

    Based on personal experience, if you're shy, you're not very well liked. Especially by certain tutors which can somewhat make the student and teacher relationship uneasy to some respect. Trying to be smart, independent, etc isn't going to help either.

    If you want to make friends, remember people only look at you based on how you behave and act as a person.

    To my surprise this is what I discovered: no matter how stupid you are, no matter how lazy/uncommitted you are, no matter how much of a douchebag you really are, no matter how much you think you're better than everyone else, as long as you socially overwhelm others, you make friends and people will like you. Even if you 'suck up', they will still like you.

    So answering your questions:

    1. It depends on how you approach the issue and how you deal with it
    2. Be yourself and don't fake. Be the person you want to be. Take baby steps
    3. Work hard but also leave some room for "playtime"

    The answers I've given are easier said than done, some that even I need to work on. But after all is said, take it or leave it.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Tulin)
    I have some great friends outside sixth form who I meet up with regularly, but it takes me a while to get to know people.
    Trust me Uni is amazing,best time of your life, Im shy, the first 2 months were horrible, I didnt really have friends,

    BUT,

    the beauty of Uni is that you meet new people EVERYDAY!!!!!!!!, out of those people you meet,you will click with at least someone then its plain sailing from there.

    Tips: If you are living in halls, force yourself to be social, avoid staying locked up in your room.You are also girl, a lot of dudes will approach,trying to get laid, for us guys we had to make an effort.

    But in the mean timework on your confidence, so you are ready for Uni
 
 
 
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    What newspaper do you read/prefer?
    Useful resources
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.