Firstly I should give a bit of a backstory as so you can understand why I am like this.
For a few years now, and for whatever reason I can't seem to 'be happy' unless I am in a relationship? and my life tends to revolve around them. I know that's not healthy/dangerous and I know this but I can't help being like this.
It's like I just need one person in my life? and I form a very strong bond and tend to almost become reliant on them.
Part of the reason is I'm not a very social person, and it just seems so awkward to me and feels unnatural to me? don't get me wrong, I have friends but I don't really go out all that much and it doesn't really bother me.
Now prior to my ex, my life was basically 'getting on with it' and I don't know why but I couldn't find any joy from anything? Like hanging out with friends, watching TV, etc .. just felt like there was always something missing in my life and I could never enjoy being single.
Then came my ex and she was perfect, and I know you're going to say no-one is perfect but she is, she was for me. We were both social recluses lol and we became each others life? I was actually more productive around her because I was always happy and my life felt like it had meaning.
We were together for 6 months? which I know people will say it's not that long but we sometimes spent like 10 hours a day with each other such was the extent that we really were the same in that we only needed one person.
We only broke up as her parents hated me (because I am from a muslim family and that was a no-no) and made her life unbearable because of it and essentially made it a case of "him or us" and she isn't in a position to be alone from her family with just me.
Now I am in the same position I was before her, and I just don't know what to do because it's not just been the month, for years I can't seem to desire anything else? I can't seem to find joy from work/hobbies/etc ...
In short, I want to 'enjoy life' but for some reason I can't seem to find anything that even compares and I hate it because I know I can't lead my life hoping to meet someone like her again because it was so rare, and I shouldn't either because I realise it's not healthy to be well dependant on someone else.
feeling of emptiness/unhappiness Watch
- Thread Starter
- 24-12-2010 14:06
- 24-12-2010 14:12
- Thread Starter
- 24-12-2010 14:44