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Boyfriend cancelled on Christmas eve... Now I'm home alone.

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Original post by Anonymous
i don't want to seem like a bitch for not letting him be with his family, seeing as his sister just got home after months. and he has been working non stop, so he's probably just tired out. but tbh, i feel really sickened by this, think im going to go for the 'being distant' and probably won't meet up with him tomorrow. I haven't replied to his other texts.


How is that going to help? If you haven't told him how excited you were, and you're now ignoring him, perhaps he thinks you're just not bothered about seeing him?

I don't get what the guy has done wrong, personally. As you said, he hasn't seen his sister in ages; that is probably why he has stayed home. He has to be with her constantly for that to be true? Bathing means he was lying? What the heck is wrong with you people?

Stop over-analysing things, stop playing games, and communicate with your partner.
(edited 13 years ago)
Reply 21
just feel really hurt.
Original post by Anonymous
just feel really hurt.


Tell him; not us.
Reply 23
Original post by Happy Insomniac
How is that going to help? If you haven't told him how excited you were, and you're now ignoring him, perhaps he thinks you're just not bothered about seeing him?

I don't get what the guy has done wrong, personally. As you said, he hasn't seen his sister in ages; that is probably why he has stayed home. He has to be with her constantly for that to be true? Bathing means he was lying? What the heck is wrong with you people?

Stop over-analysing things, stop playing games, and communicate with your partner.


i did tell him last night how much i missed him and couldn't wait to see him. he told me the same thing. yeah that's ok. just the whole last minute cancelling hurts for a while.
Reply 24
I'm really sorry to hear that:console:

I'm positive you'll have an amazing Christmas :hugs:
Original post by Anonymous
i did tell him last night how much i missed him and couldn't wait to see him. he told me the same thing. yeah that's ok. just the whole last minute cancelling hurts for a while.


So you both miss each other. That's good. It's christmas; it's about family. Don't ignore the guy for days just because he's spending some of it with his. If you're upset that he cancelled last-minute, then tell him. As I said, he probably didn't know you were that bothered seeing as you wouldn't see him last night (he might be thinking the same as you, for all you know).
Reply 26
I can't believe anyone thinks what he did was okay. What a douche. Tell him how you feel! I would be raging.
Meh. I guess I'm not as highly strung as you people. Ideally, he could have given you some notice of cancelling, but I can't say I'd be this bothered, especially given that it's christmas; it's about family, not girlfriends/boyfriends.
Reply 28
I would probably get dumped for this
Reply 29
I'm sorry to have to say this, but maybe he just doesn't care about the relationship (anymore)? In the past, I've behaved in exactly the same way. I didn't quite know why, I just didn't have the willpower to go and see my girlfriend, I couldn't really be bothered. Now I know myself better, it was because I never fully committed myself in those relationships. I didn't really care about the girl, as horrible as that sounds. I got into it just "for the sake of it". Maybe I'm totally wrong, I hope I am. But you don't deserve to be treated like this. Talk to him about it yeahh?
Reply 30
Call him, say you're going to see friends and family tomorrow and you're annoyed with him for bailing on you.
Reply 31
Original post by Anonymous


Oh, I'm sorry :frown: That sounds horrible :hugs: I wouldn't cancel on your family for tomorrow seeing as you already have once. Maybe ask your bf to come round to yours for a little while? I would definitely talk to him as that's a really weird thing to do. Tell him how you feel. I'm sorry though, it's not exactly how you want to start xmas. Try to put it behind you and focus on having a great day tomorrow with the family - maybe you could meet up on Boxing Day? :console:
(edited 13 years ago)
Reply 32
Original post by ShnnyShiz
I'm sorry to have to say this, but maybe he just doesn't care about the relationship (anymore)? In the past, I've behaved in exactly the same way. I didn't quite know why, I just didn't have the willpower to go and see my girlfriend, I couldn't really be bothered. Now I know myself better, it was because I never fully committed myself in those relationships. I didn't really care about the girl, as horrible as that sounds. I got into it just "for the sake of it". Maybe I'm totally wrong, I hope I am. But you don't deserve to be treated like this. Talk to him about it yeahh?


i really have considered this, and i have addressed it. it seems he's getting bored of me. but he insists he doesn't want to lose me, and that i'm the best thing that has ever happened to him, and that he loves me so much. this was a few weeks ago, and even this week he explains it is his job, he's just very busy. he never used to be like this. but i suppose if he cared enough, he'd make more of an effort? or am i just being needy and annoying?
Reply 33
I'd tell him to get stuffed. But that's just me...
Reply 34
Original post by Anonymous
i really have considered this, and i have addressed it. it seems he's getting bored of me. but he insists he doesn't want to lose me, and that i'm the best thing that has ever happened to him, and that he loves me so much. this was a few weeks ago, and even this week he explains it is his job, he's just very busy. he never used to be like this. but i suppose if he cared enough, he'd make more of an effort? or am i just being needy and annoying?


You're being far, far more considerate than I'd expect from even my girlfriend! He'd already agreed that you were going to spend the night together and confirmed it as well. To call it off an hour and a half later is plain ridiculous. I wouldn't do that to a stranger, let alone the SO. He could've at least texted you earlier.. it takes a second. This relationship definitely doesn't sound healthy at the moment; on the other hand, it might be something to do with him and not him getting bored of you. It's possible that he's under a huge amount of stress and is feeling really depressed, which would explain it. To be honest though, I think most probably you're right :frown:. Try and have a good night anyway. It's Christmas. :smile:
Reply 35
Original post by ShnnyShiz
You're being far, far more considerate than I'd expect from even my girlfriend! He'd already agreed that you were going to spend the night together and confirmed it as well. To call it off an hour and a half later is plain ridiculous. I wouldn't do that to a stranger, let alone the SO. He could've at least texted you earlier.. it takes a second. This relationship definitely doesn't sound healthy at the moment; on the other hand, it might be something to do with him and not him getting bored of you. It's possible that he's under a huge amount of stress and is feeling really depressed, which would explain it. To be honest though, I think most probably you're right :frown:. Try and have a good night anyway. It's Christmas. :smile:


I'm too scared to get angry with him. i don't want to be a christmas ruiner, and he may think i'm blowing it way out of proportion. i'm such a loser, cause i want to be distant with him, but he hasn't even texted me, so i'm just feeling like a complete loner, all i'm doing is checking my phone. waiting around for him. argh. i disgust myself.
Reply 36
Original post by Anonymous
I'm too scared to get angry with him. i don't want to be a christmas ruiner, and he may think i'm blowing it way out of proportion. i'm such a loser, cause i want to be distant with him, but he hasn't even texted me, so i'm just feeling like a complete loner, all i'm doing is checking my phone. waiting around for him. argh. i disgust myself.


You haven't replied to his previous texts, he won't text you for now. He probably just thinks you're in a mood, he might not realise how much he's hurt you.

Truthfully, the reason my last relationship with a genuinely great guy didn't work out was because I was too scared to say anything and we never really ended up discussing some of the main problems which broke us up after a while- things like me not feeling important enough for him to come and see me etc. In the end, the "spark" went between us and nothing felt right anymore.

Don't be scared to say something to someone who should love you enough to understand your concerns and be concerned when you're worried.
he should be grovelling for your forgiveness on his knees, ON HIS DAMN KNEES! :mad:

No seriously though it's unacceptable IMO. He confirms the same day he is coming, then he doesn't bother to say he isn't until 1.5hrs after you expect him to come. He's then on facebook...priorities a bit screwed up right there...
Reply 38
Original post by Jessaay!
You haven't replied to his previous texts, he won't text you for now. He probably just thinks you're in a mood, he might not realise how much he's hurt you.

Truthfully, the reason my last relationship with a genuinely great guy didn't work out was because I was too scared to say anything and we never really ended up discussing some of the main problems which broke us up after a while- things like me not feeling important enough for him to come and see me etc. In the end, the "spark" went between us and nothing felt right anymore.

Don't be scared to say something to someone who should love you enough to understand your concerns and be concerned when you're worried.


i did a while ago now, saying i don't think we'll be able to meet up tomorrow. no reply. just went onto his facebook there now, comments showing he's playing his xbox.
Reply 39
Original post by Anonymous
i did a while ago now, saying i don't think we'll be able to meet up tomorrow. no reply. just went onto his facebook there now, comments showing he's playing his xbox.


Call him, it's not fair on you.

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