Slightly depressed because of... Watch
When im at school, im cheerful and bubbly and social and everyone likes me and thinks im funny. im confident when im in school and i reflect that good personality of mines.
from about 3 years ago and onwards, every christmas, my family and I goes to my cousins house to celebrate christmas. my cousins are there, and my cousins mates are there. the thing is, when im at my cousins house, my cheerful and confident personality fades away and i become the quiet,shy and anti-social guy. it's really bugging my that i cant socialise with my cousins. my cousins and their mates are 18 years and over and they speak slang and behave a bit immature. im only 16. they're like those boys who think they're hard and bad, and play music out loud and i just dont like those type of people. their mates especially get on my nerve and perhaps thats whats making me less confident in expessing myself. i think they're just gonna laugh at me and ignore me. they all go upstairs and have fun but im too shy to go upstairs and so i stay downstairs. this happens all the time, even YESTERDAY!
one of female cousins called me 'quiet' and that really bothered me but i know it's true.
also, every new years day, my cousins come to my house to celebrate new years day and once again, i dont particularly socialise with them that much but lets say the mood im in is slightly better at my house coz their mates aint there.
it's a shame coz we were kinda close in the early noughties but now, we rarely talk. yesterday, i said 'hi' and 'bi'. 2 damn words.
anyways as usual they're gonna come next saturday and i really wanna change and show my good personality. any ideas, solutions...
i fear this issue i have may affect my future of not socialising properly. my dad is so cheerful and happy and socialises with everyone he meets, in parties, work, even at church today. he's so friendly and started a conversation with a new family at our church. im nothing like that...
thanks for reading this
PS: i've realised that im more sociable when my mates from school are around me and also my cousins are totally different from me... nothing in COMMON..
you dont want to hang out with people you dont like? i dont think many people do
Or invite a few friends over?