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Help What the **** have I done?!?! Watch

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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Maybe a long story so bare with me please...

    General Info

    I'm 21 and well my ex is 19. At the moment she says she wants a break. We met in Oct 2009 at a works party, where this was the first time I met her. She gave me her coat to take home. lol. So we've been together for over a year now.

    Anyways since then we were very good together. However she always complained about still living at home with her parents who she doesn't always get on well with them. By January 2010 time, she was basically sleeping round my house most nights exept the odd one. She has been very forward in the way she did things and even mention marriage/kids, and I was like um... no way too early.

    Moving on a couple of months now... By August 2010 I found out I had a full time job and started this in Sept 2010. She is sleeping round mine every day now and even when I was in work she would stay at my house. This is where our relationship started to... don't know how to put it. hit the rocks. She was always complaining that we never did anything e.g cinema, bowling. which we always used to do when I wasn't working full time. That I never paid her must attention.

    So Work Christmas Party time...(2nd week into Dec) I'm pretty drunk and just started commenting on people at the party 'I would do'. This turned out to EXPLODE and I said 'F*** this and I left the party and went out with my mates.

    The next day I realised what a T**T i had been, but I took all her clothes from my house back to her house and told her that i got off with a few girls, which I did. I told her just incase my mates told her. This day I am feeling really down.

    Since this we have texted and met up a few times. But she has openly admitted that she is seeing someone from work just as friends, which I do believe, and she is looking to basically F*** someone she used to go to college with. I hate it when she tells me whats shes doin with other people and I tell her I don't want to know.

    She has said we need to have a break and tells me when we meet that 'its over'. But she still kisses me and she has stayed over mine a once and I've stayed over hers once since all this has happen.

    I met her today to give her, her xmas presents and we kissed. She says shes confused atm and needs space.

    SO.............. What do I do.

    I really do love her and we have shared some awesome times together. I would like to get back with her but don't want to keep my hopes up. She says she wants to be friends, but I don't know if I can really.

    Need anymore info please ask.
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    • TSR Support Team
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    I would give her space, although to be honest I think you may well have already done the damage.
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    Give her some space, but tell her what you've put here. Tell her you really care about her and you made a stupid mistake. It may not work, but if it doesn't there is little else you can do. Everyone makes mistakes, but everyone also risks the fallout from those mistakes.
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    You were saying what girls you "would" in front of her and then proceeded to storm off and get with a few other girls and then only told her just in case your mates did? Wow, you sound like a tit.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Maybe a long story so bare with me please...

    General Info

    I'm 21 and well my ex is 19. At the moment she says she wants a break. We met in Oct 2009 at a works party, where this was the first time I met her. She gave me her coat to take home. lol. So we've been together for over a year now.

    Anyways since then we were very good together. However she always complained about still living at home with her parents who she doesn't always get on well with them. By January 2010 time, she was basically sleeping round my house most nights exept the odd one. She has been very forward in the way she did things and even mention marriage/kids, and I was like um... no way too early.

    Moving on a couple of months now... By August 2010 I found out I had a full time job and started this in Sept 2010. She is sleeping round mine every day now and even when I was in work she would stay at my house. This is where our relationship started to... don't know how to put it. hit the rocks. She was always complaining that we never did anything e.g cinema, bowling. which we always used to do when I wasn't working full time. That I never paid her must attention.

    So Work Christmas Party time...(2nd week into Dec) I'm pretty drunk and just started commenting on people at the party 'I would do'. This turned out to EXPLODE and I said 'F*** this and I left the party and went out with my mates.

    The next day I realised what a T**T i had been, but I took all her clothes from my house back to her house and told her that i got off with a few girls, which I did. I told her just incase my mates told her. This day I am feeling really down.

    Since this we have texted and met up a few times. But she has openly admitted that she is seeing someone from work just as friends, which I do believe, and she is looking to basically F*** someone she used to go to college with. I hate it when she tells me whats shes doin with other people and I tell her I don't want to know.

    She has said we need to have a break and tells me when we meet that 'its over'. But she still kisses me and she has stayed over mine a once and I've stayed over hers once since all this has happen.

    I met her today to give her, her xmas presents and we kissed. She says shes confused atm and needs space.

    SO.............. What do I do.

    I really do love her and we have shared some awesome times together. I would like to get back with her but don't want to keep my hopes up. She says she wants to be friends, but I don't know if I can really.

    Need anymore info please ask.
    TL,DR: Bold bit.

    Space, give the woman space.
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    Tbh, what kind of relationship do you really think you have to go back to? You cheated on her, and she has already moved on from you and is on the rebound. Move on.
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    She's confused and say she needs space, eh? Perhaps you should, erm, give her some space then?
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    Give her some space, but maybe send her some flowers with a nice message on? It's not getting in her face but its keeping you there in her mind.
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    Give her time. Once she's had time and space to think, make your decision, either walk away and leave the relationship for good or give it one last go and try to make it work. If you do try to make a relationship with her work, simply just go with her reaction, if she wants to work with it, great. if it's not what she wants, walk away.

    After that, depending on the outcome, just get some closure and continue with your life. Don't stop living simply because of your relationship status.
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    just give her some ****ing space man!
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Well I met up with her yestersday giving her presents from my family and flowers plus a thank you card for the presents.

    Right with New Years Eve coming up. I have asked her if she is doing anything and she says she doesn't know. Do I ask her today/tomorrow if she wants to go out OR do I text her on Friday she is she has any plans and whether she wants to go out.

    Thanks in advance.
    • #2
    #2

    i say give her some space, you've got to get focussed on your full time job, go out with your mates, let her do her own thing. i believe that if you try too much it'll never work out. keep in contact and make sure you tell her how bad the mistake was and how your going to do better. it seems to have been a good relationship- lasting a year and i bet shes not over you. she says all thoses things 'coz shes young and wants you to feel some pain that you made her go through. a break sounds perfect for you two. your not together now so have some fun! you need to be postive and not dwell. things will work out, i bet.

    hope this helps?!


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