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    I've had a boyfriend for seven months now, before I met him, I was texting and speaking to someone else, I was close, really close to both of them.

    Me and the latter felt natural, but he'd be busy texting loads of other people, Facebook full of comments from other boys and such, it was flirty and playful, nice too, but never going to be anything more.

    So, I go for the one who it would work with the most and feeling matured, feelings got huge. It was nice. Now, this past four weeks he's been moody, nasty, ignorant and spiteful. I don't want to be in this relationship any more, it's vile. It's all give and no receive. But, I feel like I "love" him.

    To mess things up further,- the other boy is back on the scene. He's been texting me for a while, we've been getting along well, he's been cheering me up.
    He spends the entire night texting me and only me.
    However, he's said that he is a busy person, and although is flirty, naughty and whatever, he withdraws sometimes, says we're "just" friends and will only be.

    What do I do?
    Carry on this relationship and hope it works out,
    OR
    Risk it and potentially mess up my boyfriend and myself on a whim and bit of fun.
    OR
    Suggestions TSR?
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    If you don't want to be with him anymore then break up. The other guy is irrelevant to that. Don't break up with him because there might be someone else on the sidelines.

    Something might not happen with the other guy, especially if he says you will only ever be just friends. But you don't 'need' to have someone lined up. Be single for a while, it won't do you any harm and that way you can flirt with as many guys as you want without the potential for someone getting very hurt by it.
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    (Original post by Vohamanah)
    If you don't want to be with him anymore then break up. The other guy is irrelevant to that. Don't break up with him because there might be someone else on the sidelines.

    Something might not happen with the other guy, especially if he says you will only ever be just friends. But you don't 'need' to have someone lined up. Be single for a while, it won't do you any harm and that way you can flirt with as many guys as you want without the potential for someone getting very hurt by it.
    I also don't want to hurt my current boyfriend, he'd take this really badly.
    But I can't cope with the way he is.

    But I wont be able to cope without anyone either.
    Ohhh :/
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    You realise you don't actually HAVE to be in a relationship right?

    I personally feel sorry for your current boyfriend.
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    (Original post by Knighted)
    You realise you don't actually HAVE to be in a relationship right?

    I personally feel sorry for your current boyfriend.
    Feel sorry for someone who has been moody, selfish and annoying for a month?
    Someone who has been a hypocrite and made me feel like **** for a month.

    I feel sorry for him too, I can't make myself break up with him, otherwise I would have.

    It's just, I don't know how to end this one either
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I also don't want to hurt my current boyfriend, he'd take this really badly.
    But I can't cope with the way he is.

    But I wont be able to cope without anyone either.
    Ohhh :/
    That's his lookout, quite honestly. Do what is best for you, not him, especially if he makes you as unhappy as you claim. It will be hard but I assure you it will be worth it.

    You won't be able to cope without anyone? How come, how old are you? I'm fairly sure that you could cope. If I can cope anyone can, quite honestly.
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    (Original post by Vohamanah)
    That's his lookout, quite honestly. Do what is best for you, not him, especially if he makes you as unhappy as you claim. It will be hard but I assure you it will be worth it.

    You won't be able to cope without anyone? How come, how old are you? I'm fairly sure that you could cope. If I can cope anyone can, quite honestly.
    Not long turned 18, i'm not a major fan of relationships. Got used when I was like ummm 15, then again when I was 16, had a few "flings", and now i'm with him.

    I just have to be attached to someone, not overly clingy, just to know that I have someone who will hug me on a cold dark night, or a nice unconditionally caring voice on the other end of the phone.

    I have loads of friends, but that's the problem,- huge group of friends, good nights out but then everyone's busy busy busy.

    I need SOMEONE, and I know how selfish that sounds.
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    If you dont want to be in the relationship, dont be in it. Its as simple as that.

    Either

    A) Have a chat with him find out whats wrong and try to improve the relationship.
    B) Have a chat with him and tell him its over.

    theres also:

    C) Continue flirting with other guy till u find out he wants relationship and then dump your boyfriend so you can get with this guy.

    This however pretty much marks you as a callous *****. If you take path C you will more than likely find that your new relationship with the new guy will result in him being less respectful to you. Why should he respect you? you left another guy for him.

    Be single girl, show both of them that you don't need them and you will have both of them gagging to be with you. Simple.
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    tell him wag1
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    (Original post by Knighted)
    If you dont want to be in the relationship, dont be in it. Its as simple as that.

    Either

    A) Have a chat with him find out whats wrong and try to improve the relationship.
    B) Have a chat with him and tell him its over.

    theres also:

    C) Continue flirting with other guy till u find out he wants relationship and then dump your boyfriend so you can get with this guy.

    This however pretty much marks you as a callous *****. If you take path C you will more than likely find that your new relationship with the new guy will result in him being less respectful to you. Why should he respect you? you left another guy for him.

    Be single girl, show both of them that you don't need them and you will have both of them gagging to be with you. Simple.
    The other guy knows that i'm in this relationship, he was pretty upset that I got with him and tends to ask questions about how it's going quite a bit.
    I've spoken to him about it all and stuff.

    I don't want to upset anyone, I'd prefer my boyfriend to hate me for being nasty, and have no feelings for me.
    So,
    I was thinking some sort of staggered withdrawal from him? :/
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Not long turned 18, i'm not a major fan of relationships. Got used when I was like ummm 15, then again when I was 16, had a few "flings", and now i'm with him.

    I just have to be attached to someone, not overly clingy, just to know that I have someone who will hug me on a cold dark night, or a nice unconditionally caring voice on the other end of the phone.

    I have loads of friends, but that's the problem,- huge group of friends, good nights out but then everyone's busy busy busy.

    I need SOMEONE, and I know how selfish that sounds.
    I'm not being funny, but man the **** up. Its one thing having someone on call for sex and occassional cuddles when needed, but why tie yourself down with someone who's guts you clearly hate because you don't want to leave the safety net of a relationship.
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    Non of them, better be single than be with someone who dont really value you.
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    (Original post by Vohamanah)
    I'm not being funny, but man the **** up. Its one thing having someone on call for sex and occassional cuddles when needed, but why tie yourself down with someone who's guts you clearly hate because you don't want to leave the safety net of a relationship.
    It's not about sex.
    I have feelings for him, that's why I can't leave him.
    I don't want to hurt him, but I don't want to be with him.

    I hope you understand, I have major feelings for him, I just wish it went back to how it was, not how it is now.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It's not about sex.
    I have feelings for him, that's why I can't leave him.
    I don't want to hurt him, but I don't want to be with him.

    I hope you understand, I have major feelings for him, I just wish it went back to how it was, not how it is now.
    You can't go backwards, life doesn't work that way. It will never be quite the same as it was.

    I totally understand how hard it is, but you must put yourself first. He can deal with his own feelings, its not your issue. You want out so get out. It'll only hurt him more the longer you carry on pretending, anyway. Look after number one.
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    (Original post by Vohamanah)
    You can't go backwards, life doesn't work that way. It will never be quite the same as it was.

    I totally understand how hard it is, but you must put yourself first. He can deal with his own feelings, its not your issue. You want out so get out. It'll only hurt him more the longer you carry on pretending, anyway. Look after number one.
    I guess I was hoping for someone to be able to magically fix it :/
    I'm going to have to sort this all out one way or another. Just don't want anyone to get hurt, or be alone for years.

    Thank you, means alot, honestly. Have a healthy and safe New Year!
 
 
 
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