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    Hi guys,

    I know this thread sounds vaguely like a title to an episode of the big bang theory, but it's actually a fairly imminent problem.

    I'm in my second year of uni and it's that joyous time of year when people start thinking about signing contracts for student housing. I won't bore you all with details of the reasoning behind the decision, but my friend and I have decided to move out together, without our other two housemates. They're not particularly close so they'd be unlikely to want to live together alone and it's likely that their coursemates have signed contracts already...

    Basically, my friend and I have to have the 'we don't want to live with you conversation' and we have no idea how to do this. Talking about serious things like this does not come naturally to either of us and we really don't want to upset them or put them in an akward situation where they'll have to live alone. But they're really difficult people to live with and we need to get out!

    We want to give them as much notice as possible so we need to get out skates on with this, so does anyone have any tips? Maybe someone who's had this conversation before? Anything would be helpful!
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    (Original post by [Shea])
    Hi guys,

    I know this thread sounds vaguely like a title to an episode of the big bang theory, but it's actually a fairly imminent problem.

    I'm in my second year of uni and it's that joyous time of year when people start thinking about signing contracts for student housing. I won't bore you all with details of the reasoning behind the decision, but my friend and I have decided to move out together, without our other two housemates. They're not particularly close so they'd be unlikely to want to live together alone and it's likely that their coursemates have signed contracts already...

    Basically, my friend and I have to have the 'we don't want to live with you conversation' and we have no idea how to do this. Talking about serious things like this does not come naturally to either of us and we really don't want to upset them or put them in an akward situation where they'll have to live alone. But they're really difficult people to live with and we need to get out!

    We want to give them as much notice as possible so we need to get out skates on with this, so does anyone have any tips? Maybe someone who's had this conversation before? Anything would be helpful!
    Can you and your friend pretend to be in a relationship and tell these other two housemates that you're actually setting up a love nest for yourselves? Make sure that you have a plausible backstory, though, so you can agree on how you got together, have an answer for why you kept it secret, maybe set up pictures of you on occasions like halloween and Christmas (if you get your skates on, you can use the decorations that are still around and wrap up some boxes as presents for one another), that sort of thing.

    Remember: the secret to a successful lie is in the details.
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    I have just been through a similar situation, so I can sympathize with you well!

    In the end, we all sat down and had a talk about where we were living next year. I said that I felt I would remain better friends with the girls if we didn't live together, as I felt friction may be caused with another year of living together, and I didn't want to risk our friendship.

    Tell them you still want to be friends, and still want to see them, but you feel you would be better friends if you did not live together for the third year. Hopefully they should not be offended at this, and you can live for the rest of the year with no problems.

    Good luck!
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    (Original post by hkwilson)
    I have just been through a similar situation, so I can sympathize with you well!

    In the end, we all sat down and had a talk about where we were living next year. I said that I felt I would remain better friends with the girls if we didn't live together, as I felt friction may be caused with another year of living together, and I didn't want to risk our friendship.

    Tell them you still want to be friends, and still want to see them, but you feel you would be better friends if you did not live together for the third year. Hopefully they should not be offended at this, and you can live for the rest of the year with no problems.

    Good luck!
    I did this last year. Sadly, the girl I said it to has now done the following: deleted me on facebook; blocked me on msn; refused to be mature and talk to me (she just avoids eye contact with me now); spread lies about me and has basically split our friendship group apart.

    She has even gone so far as to do the same to my flatmates I'm currently living with which I feel is a step too far.


    OP: It can go either way- either they will accept it and move on, or hold a grudge and never speak to you. Fact is, there ain't no way of sugar coating it so just tell 'em plain and simple. (:
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    If they're nice people, they'll understand and move on. If they act like the above situation, they sound like you'd be best without them anyway.
 
 
 
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