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friend's engagement

as
(edited 12 years ago)
Reply 1
Avatar for boba
boba
congratulate him because you should be happy for him since its such a big thing in his life and its not about you. don't congratulate her if you don't talk to her anyway..
Reply 2
Avatar for craggy-island
craggy-island
OP
you cant really only congratulate one person in an engagement though
Reply 3
Avatar for boba
boba
yes you can when you see your friend say to him "congratulations". if you congratulate him when she's not there then your clearly just congratulating him for a big step in his life and would be regardless who the girl is, if you say it when there together then it will seem like the sentiment is applied to both of them
Reply 4
Avatar for craggy-island
craggy-island
OP
i doubt i would be able to keep up the pretence, and certainly not in her presence as i can not pretend to be her friend after what she said about me no self respecting person would and i made my feelings about her perfectly clear

most of his male friends also believe hes making a mistake
Just say 'Congratulation, I wish you all the best'. Or just even congratulations; it doesn't automatically translate to 'I have forgiven you' or 'I think you're a fantastic person' or that you think she's the perfect person for you're friend - you're just being there for him. IMO, that doesn't make you two faced.
Reply 6
Avatar for craggy-island
craggy-island
OP
thanks think i will take your advice, just hope she doesnt think that because i congratulate her that the bad feelings have been brushed under the carpet
Reply 7
Avatar for boba
boba
you don't have to pretend to be her friend but I don't understand why your not happy for HIM if he's your friend and he loves her shouldn't you be happy that something goods happened to him even if you don't like the girl :s-smilie:
Reply 8
Avatar for craggy-island
craggy-island
OP
i do not see how in all honesty i can be happy for him if I believe hes making one of the bigest mistakes of his life

and i know im not the only one of his close friends who have these views.
I do not want to cause any trouble between them but i certainly can not force myself to be happy
Reply 9
Avatar for boba
boba
hmm I thought you meant you just didn't like the girl personally not you thought she was bad for him. sorry I miss understood
Original post by craggy-island
One of my best friends recently got engaged to a girl who prior to the engagement i had a big falling out with because I pulled her up for something she said about me

im not to sure how i should react to the news because I would be very two faced if i was to congratulate them both, yet i would not be a good friend if i did not at least put up the pretenece of being happy for them


What would you do, if you had absolutely 0 time to think about this sh**? Just do exactly that!

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