My girlfriend is pregnant with another guy's baby. Watch

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 8 years ago
#1
My girlfriend is 20 and I'm 22, I've been with her for nearly three years (except for a two month break in October/November) during this break she slept with another guy and fell pregnant. Under no circumstances does she want to get rid of the baby or anything like that and I completely understand that but it places me in a really awkward situation. The break made me realise (and her) how much we're in love and how perfect we are, yet this baby is going to create massive problems. She has been completely and utterly honest with me and now I don't know what to do. She told me that ideally I'd "father" the baby and we'd carry on as normal and I said I'd happily do that (for fear of losing her) -we've even told her/my family and friends that we're expecting! I'm just worried that even before the baby is born I'm having serious doubts! Does it seem ridiculous to try and live this lie, or would it seem worth a shot?! :/ please help me! x
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Louzilla
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#2
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If you want to raise the baby as yours then it's a very honorable thing to do. I doubt many people would say it's stupid, if you think it will work, then that's all that matters!
Good luck
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StephenP91
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#3
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#3
Coming here for advice is pointless. Only you know what you want. Whether it is right or wrong, none of that matters.
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Bonfire
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#4
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(Original post by Anonymous)
She told me that ideally I'd "father" the baby and we'd carry on as normal and I said I'd happily do that (for fear of losing her) -
No, no. No, no, no, no, no, no. No. Dear God man, no.
23
village_anonymous
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#5
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If you're having serious problems do you really think it will work?

If you got another girlfriend pregnant and you were going to be the baby's father do you think she'd stay with you? Be honest.

Sorry man, but wake up.
13
ameelia22
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#6
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#6
First and foremost, be completely honest with yourself. Can you father this baby like it's your own? If you can't, you tell her that now or it's not fair on her. You tell her exactly what you feel, for better or for worse, because there's nothing like a guy suddenly deciding he doesn't the fancy the whole baby thing after all, and ****ing off elsewhere.
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yvaiine
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#7
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Sure, it'll be difficult, but I think it's a very good thing for you to do.
I do think, however, that telling your family and friends that it's yours is quite unfair on the baby.
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IlexBlue
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#8
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#8
This has disaster waiting to happen written all over it.
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CoffeeStinks
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#9
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#9
(Original post by XCLNC)
go on Jeremy Kyle show
This is a bit too tame for Jeremy, throw in a midget and a drug habit and then it's good.
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rylit91
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#10
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My girlfriend is 20 and I'm 22, I've been with her for nearly three years (except for a two month break in October/November) during this break she slept with another guy and fell pregnant. Under no circumstances does she want to get rid of the baby or anything like that and I completely understand that but it places me in a really awkward situation. The break made me realise (and her) how much we're in love and how perfect we are, yet this baby is going to create massive problems. She has been completely and utterly honest with me and now I don't know what to do. She told me that ideally I'd "father" the baby and we'd carry on as normal and I said I'd happily do that (for fear of losing her) -we've even told her/my family and friends that we're expecting! I'm just worried that even before the baby is born I'm having serious doubts! Does it seem ridiculous to try and live this lie, or would it seem worth a shot?! :/ please help me! x
(Original post by Louzilla)
If you want to raise the baby as yours then it's a very honorable thing to do. I doubt many people would say it's stupid, if you think it will work, then that's all that matters!
Good luck
For goodness sake, how can you think raising it is a good idea?! You state that the break made you realise how much both of you love the other - where I'm from, if I have a sudden epiphany about how much one loves another, I don't go and sleep with someone else. All this shows is that she's a sex-crazed whore who can't go for long without her 'fix'. If you want to spend your life with this despicable character and raise her ******* child who will probably turn out like her, then go ahead. Best option for you is to dump her and leave her in the self-induced crisis she's placed herself. You deserve better, and you also deserve to have and pay for a child that is your own.
24
Crazydavy
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#11
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All I can say is that being a father is hardly about sharing the same genes but it depends if you're comfortable with the idea or not, and you would have to be 100% sure on such a big decision. Don't lie to your friends and family though.
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helz_91
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#12
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#12
To bring up a child that is not yours as your own is very admirable. The fact that you're already having doubts is probably natural although concerning as surely these will only worsen as time goes on? Furthermore it seems you're only young, if you end up breaking up with your gf or something, won't these be more problematic for the child in the long run?! I think (obviously) that it is a very serious decision that ought to be made on a greater basis than purely fear of losing your gf. If you decide this is something you can do, then that is truly admirable and I wish you the best of luck, just think about it carefully x
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Becca-Sarah
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#13
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Being a dad is about raising a kid, not contributing a single sperm.
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Louzilla
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#14
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(Original post by rylit91)
For goodness sake, how can you think raising it is a good idea?! You state that the break made you realise how much both of you love the other - where I'm from, if I have a sudden epiphany about how much one loves another, I don't go and sleep with someone else. All this shows is that she's a sex-crazed whore who can't go for long without her 'fix'. If you want to spend your life with this despicable character and raise her ******* child who will probably turn out like her, then go ahead. Best option for you is to dump her and leave her in the self-induced crisis she's placed herself. You deserve better, and you also deserve to have and pay for a child that is your own.
If he thinks that it will work out then why not?
Yes, it doesn't sound great, going on a break and sleeping with someone else but how can you judge online, how much he loves her and how much she loves him? Don't be ignorant.
1
Anonymous #3
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My girlfriend is 20 and I'm 22, I've been with her for nearly three years (except for a two month break in October/November) during this break she slept with another guy and fell pregnant. Under no circumstances does she want to get rid of the baby or anything like that and I completely understand that but it places me in a really awkward situation. The break made me realise (and her) how much we're in love and how perfect we are, yet this baby is going to create massive problems. She has been completely and utterly honest with me and now I don't know what to do. She told me that ideally I'd "father" the baby and we'd carry on as normal and I said I'd happily do that (for fear of losing her) -we've even told her/my family and friends that we're expecting! I'm just worried that even before the baby is born I'm having serious doubts! Does it seem ridiculous to try and live this lie, or would it seem worth a shot?! :/ please help me! x
(Original post by Louzilla)
If you want to raise the baby as yours then it's a very honorable thing to do. I doubt many people would say it's stupid, if you think it will work, then that's all that matters!
Good luck

Anonymous i know people on here, ARE YOU MAD! yes he is stupid and yes this is coming from guys point of view, unfortunately this happen to friend of mine and they break up 4 months after the bad was born, you may be in love now but things will change! they always do! yeah may be you can try but really do you want to bond to kid that aint even yours? cant u just remain friends? this girl doesnt love you, it may take you time to reliease this and tbh no one on here should be telling you want to do, this is your life and you will make our own mistakes people will just sit by and let it happen good luck, just one of them things when you know someone will fail before they even start
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CookieDoughLove
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#16
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Definately not stupid. I'd be honoured to be asked to raised someone elses child. She obviously loves you if she's asking you to play such a huge role in this child's life.

Having said that, it is a massive commitment, so really you need to discuss these concerns or doubts you're having with her before it's too late. Only you can decide whats right though
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CookieDoughLove
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#17
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(Original post by Becca-Sarah)
Being a dad is about raising a kid, not contributing a single sperm.
Fully support this.
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BradP
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#18
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#18
Dont let her force you into this and make sure you dont put her in difficult positions later on by changing your mind.
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Boom Boom Pow
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#19
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It's easy for her to say what will happen when she has the baby because she doesn't really have much to lose. Personally I wouldn't be able to do it, especially at such a young age, as I will want my own kids and it will be likely that my biological child would receive more attention even if I do it subconsciously.
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Huskaris
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#20
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Don't worry man, there's professional help out there for you. I personally have heard of a man who specialises in helping people in these situations. His name is Mr J.Kyle.
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