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I'm a 22 year old guy, and I suffer bad from anxiety and low self esteem, any advice? watch

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    So basically, I have been suffering from anxiety and low self esteem for about 2 - 3 years now. It has affected my ability to live a "normal" life, and I sometimes struggle with little things that a lot of people would say is nothing. One of the problems I have is that I cannot find any motivation to look for work, at all!

    I have been applying online when I feel like it, but usually I never bother because I feel that I don't have the confidence to work at the moment. I know it all sounds stupid, but that's what it's like at the moment for me. I do want a job, and to be earning money to go places and buy stuff, but I just haven't got the confidence to do so at the moment. Why can I not break down this barrier?

    I went to a counsellor multiple times over a few months and it helped for a while, but then I just went back to the way I was before. Also, I don't really have any social life at the moment, so I'm usually bored and depressed to go along with it. Therefore I have nothing to take my mind off of my situation. It's really horrible to feel like this, and I don't want to feel like this, but what else can I do...?
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    do something physical. try indoor climbing. you need to (a) get physically fitter, (b) improve your self esteem and (c) meet people.
    or do an evening class & learn a language.
    Work out what you'd be willing to try for a job. Are there any qualifications that could help get you that job?
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    i posted a thread on this as well, i suffer from the same situation and can relate in how it feels. I guess to others it seems its a case of manning up and getting on with stuff, but even though i want to... i get crippled in those scenarios. it started with work related encounters and then leaked in to my social life, now i'm too anxious to try anything new.

    i guess the problem is that I build things up in my mind, think everything through and find it hard to relax and go with the flow.
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    (Original post by markyp)
    So basically, I have been suffering from anxiety and low self esteem for about 2 - 3 years now. It has affected my ability to live a "normal" life, and I sometimes struggle with little things that a lot of people would say is nothing. One of the problems I have is that I cannot find any motivation to look for work, at all!

    I have been applying online when I feel like it, but usually I never bother because I feel that I don't have the confidence to work at the moment. I know it all sounds stupid, but that's what it's like at the moment for me. I do want a job, and to be earning money to go places and buy stuff, but I just haven't got the confidence to do so at the moment. Why can I not break down this barrier?

    I went to a counsellor multiple times over a few months and it helped for a while, but then I just went back to the way I was before. Also, I don't really have any social life at the moment, so I'm usually bored and depressed to go along with it. Therefore I have nothing to take my mind off of my situation. It's really horrible to feel like this, and I don't want to feel like this, but what else can I do...?
    Maybe aim a bit lower when it comes to getting a job, not too low like mcdonalds but something you have a good chance of getting as once you have a job that will help with your confidence. You will have to psych yourself up a bit to apply though.

    Also maybe try working out as thats good for self esteem and confidence. Also just go out and do things more, even if its going to the shops, the more you are around people the better you will feel. Use something to motivate you like thinking of the things you want and use that motivation to get a job.
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    In order to overcome low self-esteem, you need to understand it.

    (Original post by markyp)
    So basically, I have been suffering from anxiety and low self esteem for about 2 - 3 years now. It has affected my ability to live a "normal" life, and I sometimes struggle with little things that a lot of people would say is nothing. One of the problems I have is that I cannot find any motivation to look for work, at all!
    You say you've had low self-esteem for about 2-3 years. What triggered it? If you don't know, try to think about someone else who you would say had low self-esteem - this might be easier because, if you try to look at yourself it is often difficult to obtain a clear view. Think about that person you have chosen and remember recent times when you have met. What happened? What did the do? How did the feel? etc

    Write down the things that make that person (or you) seem like they have low self-esteem.

    (Original post by markyp)
    I have been applying online when I feel like it, but usually I never bother because I feel that I don't have the confidence to work at the moment. I know it all sounds stupid, but that's what it's like at the moment for me. I do want a job, and to be earning money to go places and buy stuff, but I just haven't got the confidence to do so at the moment. Why can I not break down this barrier?
    Loss of self-esteem is sometimes a consequence of some other problems which cause distress and disruption (in your case, finding a job). In this case, tackling the root problem may provide the most effective solution to the problem. People who learn to manage anxiety, for example, are often restored to previous levels of confidence without needing to do extensive work on low SE in it's own right.

    (Original post by markyp)
    I went to a counsellor multiple times over a few months and it helped for a while, but then I just went back to the way I was before. Also, I don't really have any social life at the moment, so I'm usually bored and depressed to go along with it. Therefore I have nothing to take my mind off of my situation. It's really horrible to feel like this, and I don't want to feel like this, but what else can I do...?
    Perhaps you should consider Cognitive Behavior Therapy - it has been proved beneficial, especially for low-self esteem, because it provides an easily grasped framework for understanding how the problem developed and what keeps it going. I would recommend you go back to your counsellor and find out more information (if you don't know already), and maybe they can help you tackle the problem as a long, rather than short term basis.
 
 
 
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