I'm in hell.. Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 7 years ago
#1
Anon or delete please.
I would prefer friends on here to be unaware of this..
Thank you.

It's a long 'un but any help would seriously mean so so so much to me!

Basically I go to a uni. in my home town because my parents didn't want me moving too far away. I moved out of home into uni. accommodation despite this. It was all well and good but I started to develop severe self-esteem problems after a few weeks and my insecurity with myself basically shot up. I started to hate living in halls and would dread having to go there after my lectures.

I asked the uni. if I could move back home and was allowed to do so for the second semester.
Now that I've moved back, it's only gotten worse. My parents have always been over-protective but I thought that maybe they'll lay off me if I moved out for half a year. ..but no, they're still as bad as they were. They don't let me go out till too late (i.e. uni for lectures, then back home.) and they always want to know who I'm going out with (names AND numbers of them all). I'm not allowed to see or talk to my boyfriend who I've been going out with for over a year. I'm not allowed to stay at my friend's halls overnight. I'm not allowed to go out to clubs. They constantly pester me about doing my uni. work. They don't let me join a lot of the societies I'm interested in (i.e. my mum didn't let me apply to volunteer for Nightline)

Someone I know offered me their halls for the rest of the year because they saw how miserable I was getting I was honestly over-the-moon and couldn't wait to move back out.
..but my mum said that I had my chance to live in halls and I blew it. She said that now that I've moved home, I've got to stay here.
I'm not allowed to move into a house with my coursemates for my second or third year.


..it's honestly hell. I spend my time sitting in my bedroom (which she comes into regularly to complain that it's messy) on my laptop refreshing facebook every 2 mintues. I have nothing else to do my freshers year is awful. ..and it's only going to get worse when my boyfriend moves away to uni next year and my friends move into their house...while I'm still in my bedroom I've been in since I was 14 being pestered at by my mum.

Help me?
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TheCurlyHairedDude
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#2
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Oh, so what's it like in hell? Could have at least added some hardcore imagery
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in_vogue
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#3
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Um....you're an adult? Take some responsibility. Get loans, grants, part-time work, and stop allowing yourself to be treated like a baby. MOVE OUT.

You have self-confidence issues. Why? Because you are insecure in the world because your parents haven't allowed you to explore it.
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Racheld25
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#4
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If you're at uni, you're 18+
Legally an adult. Your parents are going to have to learn to accept you're not young anymore. Don't ask if you can go, tell them you are doing. Uni is supposedly the best years of your life? Then get out there and live it! You're paying enough money to be there, so you might as well get the most out of it.
Maybe go back and see your parents every Sunday - when you're hungover, and allowed to be
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orc7
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Your over 18, your mum can't make you stay at home, find some confidence and stand your ground.
Move out, go back to halls, if you don't want t stay at that uni (as you stated you were told to go there because it's close) than transfer.
Your parent's are just clinging onto you because they see you don't have the guts to go, stand up for yourself and show them you won't be bullied.
Fair enough they are your parents, but your an adult and it's your life so take action instead of sitting on facebook depressed at the world, because trust me, it will only get worse!
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Teveth
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#6
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You need to let your parents know that you are an adult and expect to be treated like one. To deny you the opportunity of moving into a house next year is entirely unreasonable, and rather absurd.
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tsr-member
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#7
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(Original post by orc7)
Your over 18, your mum can't make you stay at home, find some confidence and stand your ground.
Move out, go back to halls, if you don't want t stay at that uni (as you stated you were told to go there because it's close) than transfer.
Your parent's are just clinging onto you because they see you don't have the guts to go, stand up for yourself and show them you won't be bullied.
Fair enough they are your parents, but your an adult and it's your life so take action instead of sitting on facebook depressed at the world, because trust me, it will only get worse!
Thank you for your response.
I mentioned this to another one of my friends and as she is going home for Easter, she said I can stay in her room for free for the whole of April. Obviously that means more that I have another 2 weeks at home untill then and then May and June at home too. On the other hand, I could move into halls for £1000 for the whole 3 months. What do you think I should do?
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orc7
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(Original post by tsr-member)
Thank you for your response.
I mentioned this to another one of my friends and as she is going home for Easter, she said I can stay in her room for free for the whole of April. Obviously that means more that I have another 2 weeks at home untill then and then May and June at home too. On the other hand, I could move into halls for £1000 for the whole 3 months. What do you think I should do?
If it was me, i'd just move into halls...
Because after April your stuck back at stage one again and you really don't want that. If your loan covers it then go for it, get a little part time job if it's only a little bit of extra cash you need.
Just try and be happy! And you being at home is not making you happy.
The last thing you want is to start feeling really depressed, being stuck at home, not do well in your degree, etccc.
Your parents will always be your parents and they will always be there for you, but you need to live your life for you, not based on their approval. Because at the end of the day you will only ever have yourself and your memories.
Hope it all goes well, stay strong x
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