Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
x Turn on thread page Beta

POLL : Gay rights : what if you had two dads? watch

  • View Poll Results: What if you had two dads?
    agree with it
    70
    20.29%
    disagree
    130
    37.68%
    wouldn't effect my mental and social upbringing
    145
    42.03%

    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by tehFrance)
    From my experience gay men have handle this a lot better than straight men, they are more prepared for the question as they know that one of them will be asked, also a fair few straight single fathers are preapred for the question too and thus able to answer it better than straight men who have the mother around.
    But still none of them would be as good as a woman. I'm sorry if this upsets people, but it is true (in general)
    Offline

    15
    (Original post by Lewroll)
    But still none of them would be as good as a woman. I'm sorry if this upsets people, but it is true (in general)
    I'm sorry but I don't buy it for a minute.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Lewroll)
    I never said always. I said assuming all candidates would do a good job, heterosexual couples would still be the best option. If the straight couple are crappy they shouldn't get any child until they sort themselves out.
    Well, that's not a useful assumption to make.

    To be honest, if you're going to select for factors like this, it probably makes more sense to put a large emphasis on socioeconomic background and highest level of education etc. (as not every couple there will be equally affluent or well-educated) as there are proven correlations between these factors and child development, and no proven links between the respective genders of the couple and child development. You can say, "Yeah but homosexual couples just aren't as good parents" all you want. Empirical findings don't back you up, so why should we listen to you? It's easy to make random assertions.

    Incidentally, gay men are statistically likely to be better both in terms of socioeconomic group and education.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by harmonize)
    I can't imagine it would be particularly healthy - humans are naturally brought up with two parents, one male, one female.

    I don't know of any studies that cover the effect of same sex parents on a childs psyche, but I do know that a rise in single parent homes and high divorce rates is probably responsible for a rise in all aspects of crime ,as well as personality disorders and mental illness.

    Whether this is the effect of having one instead of two parents, or of being brought up by one sex, I don't know.
    It has been proven, through numerous studies that there is no difference in the children raised by gay/lesbian couples as opposed to straight couples. This pretty much sums it up: "Studies comparing groups of children raised by homosexual and by heterosexual parents find no developmental differences between the two groups of children in four critical areas: their intelligence, psychological adjustment, social adjustment, and popularity with friends. It is also important to realize that a parent's sexual orientation does not indicate their children's."

    In essence I can see why people would assume that having two parents of the same gender would cause differences in children, but it appears that it doesn't and same-sex parents aren't comparable to single parents in that respect.
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jordenfruitbat)
    Yeah I did word that wrong... What I meant is why should a striaght couple be chosen over a gay couple on standards of sexuality?
    Its not just about sexuality. Its about what a parent can give a child. Obviously a male and female will have more to give a child, as they are different. Different perspectives on life etc. A man is different to a woman. Women are generally more emotional and caring.
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by tehFrance)
    I'm sorry but I don't buy it for a minute.
    Ok.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jordenfruitbat)
    Yeah I did word that wrong I would find it a priveledge if I did manage to adopt a child someday... What I meant is why should a striaght couple be chosen over a gay couple on standards of sexuality, just because there are two fathers doesn't mean that they can't bring up a child just aswell as a straight couple.
    Yes I agree with you here. Ultimately the child should go to the couple in the best situation economically, be it gay or straight. To be honest though, given the constant shortage of couples wanting to adopt there is very rarely a choice at all, let alone one between a gay and straight couple.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Lewroll)
    Its not just about sexuality. Its about what a parent can give a child. Obviously a male and female will have more to give a child, as they are different. Different perspectives on life etc. A man is different to a woman. Women are generally more emotional and caring.
    But doesn't every person have a different perspective on life? The two gay men will provide different views to give to the child, I would say I am quite an emotional and caring person, evident in me choosing nursing as a proffesion to go into , just because I am a guy doesn't mean I can't care or be as expressive as a woman.
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jordenfruitbat)
    But doesn't every person have a different perspective on life? The two gay men will provide different views to give to the child, I would say I am quite an emotional and caring person, evident in me choosing nursing as a proffesion to go into , just because I am a guy doesn't mean I can't care or be as expressive as a woman.
    I'm sure you are a caring person. And remember, I never said gay parents would be bad. However children need a mother. This is one of the main points of raising a child throughout humans and also in animals as well. The mother is nearly always present. Surely this tells you something? I do not doubt your parenting ability btw, and if you raise a child it will probably turn out fine.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    i really don't see a problem with having two fathers. a parent is a parent, stop being so homophobic
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    I didn't answer the poll because none of the answers were fitting really.

    My mental and social upbringing would of course be different - but that's not to say bad different.
    If I were brought up with gay parents then I obviously wouldn't have a problem with it at all, because id've been raised with liberal pro-gay marriage views; I would love my parents.

    Do I feel that I would be missing out on a main role model? Well that depends. Are there any aunties that I see regularly, older cousins or female family friends? In that case, I don't feel that I would be missing out as much as other people may think; then not only do i have male and female roles in my life but I have at least three people who love me and can act as an example for me - quite fortunate really.

    About Bullying, well - There are a million reasons why a child might be bullied. It's how you as a parent deal with that bullying that makes a difference, so in the case of good and proactive parents, then this would not be an issue at all.

    Another thing I think we have to be wary of is how the child came about - Whether the child were raised from birth with gay parents or whether a marriage broke up at some stage in the child's life when a parent realised/ decided to act upon their homosexuality. I think that after being raised in a Male-Female household, suddenly being raised in a Female-Female or Male-Male household would be considerably more challenging - Especially if the other parent bares some resentment to their homosexual ex-spouse.
    Offline

    15
    (Original post by Lewroll)
    However children need a mother.
    Unless you have substantial proof, this shouldn't be stated as fact.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Lewroll)
    I'm sure you are a caring person. And remember, I never said gay parents would be bad. However children need a mother. This is one of the main points of raising a child throughout humans and also in animals as well. The mother is nearly always present. Surely this tells you something? I do not doubt your parenting ability btw, and if you raise a child it will probably turn out fine.
    I don't think they do need a mother it really doesnt matter the gender of the person who brings up the child imo, my dad was the one to bring up 7 children, after my mother deserted him, and I turned out all fine and so did my brothers and sisters, I know this is sort of an anomoly, just from my own personal experiences I have done fine without a mother figure

    And thanks lol :P
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by tehFrance)
    Unless you have substantial proof, this shouldn't be stated as fact.
    Surely the fact that nearly every species on the planet is raised by a female in its infancy is sufficient proof. Of course you will say no, but this is a very obvious fact.

    Females give birth to children. Females are very often the primary care givers. Females are designed for this. It is their biological 'role' if you will. It is a fact.
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jordenfruitbat)
    I don't think they do need a mother it really doesnt matter the gender of the person who brings up the child imo, my dad was the one to bring up 7 children, after my mother deserted him, and I turned out all fine and so did my brothers and sisters, I know this is sort of an anomoly, just from my own personal experiences I have done fine without a mother figure

    And thanks lol :P
    Notice I've being saying 'in general' throughout this thread. Humans are so diverse that it would be difficult to apply one rule to all of them. But for the majority this seems to be the truth.
    Offline

    15
    (Original post by Lewroll)
    Surely the fact that nearly every species on the planet is raised by a female in its infancy is sufficient proof. Of course you will say no, but this is a very obvious fact.

    Females give birth to children. Females are very often the primary care givers. Females are designed for this. It is their biological 'role' if you will. It is a fact.
    Just because women give birth to them doesn't mean that children automatically require a mother, as I have said before plenty of people have done well without a mother bringing them up.
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by tehFrance)
    Just because women give birth to them doesn't mean that children automatically require a mother, as I have said before plenty of people have done well without a mother bringing them up.
    They are exceptions. There are always exceptions.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by tieyourmotherdown)
    It has been proven, through numerous studies that there is no difference in the children raised by gay/lesbian couples as opposed to straight couples. This pretty much sums it up: "Studies comparing groups of children raised by homosexual and by heterosexual parents find no developmental differences between the two groups of children in four critical areas: their intelligence, psychological adjustment, social adjustment, and popularity with friends. It is also important to realize that a parent's sexual orientation does not indicate their children's."

    In essence I can see why people would assume that having two parents of the same gender would cause differences in children, but it appears that it doesn't and same-sex parents aren't comparable to single parents in that respect.
    That isn't a study, it's a help centre, which is likely to suggest bias things lo..
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Studies have shown that children brought up by same-sex couples fare just as well as those brought up by a couple of differing genders.

    Frankly, as long as the parents are educated in terms of children and 'growing up'(as all parents should be but usually don't seem to be) then there is no difference regardless of the sexuality of the parents. There's not many differences between the genders apart from the obvious ones and perhaps personal experience, however all parents should ideally make the effort to understand all gender-related problems so as to provide adequate advice and guidance.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Lewroll)
    They are exceptions. There are always exceptions.
    Exactly. Henceforth there are exceptions where children do not fare well when they have two parents of differing gender. Thus, this argument is cancelled out.
 
 
 
Poll
Are you going to a festival?
Useful resources

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.