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Do you think it's more likely that you'll marry someone from a similar background? watch

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    I'm not being racist or snobbish, I'm attracted to girls no matter what race or background they have, but when it comes to forming a long-lasting relationship isn't it more likely you'll marry someone from the same sort of background as you because you'll have more in common and more to talk about. For example if you go out with a foreign girl, if you go to speak to her about one of her favourite shows that they don't have in her country then thats just going to kill the conversation. What do you think?
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    I don't want anything that will remind me of my mum, so no.
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    To increase the chances of it surviving longer than few years than YES ! (regardless of the happily ever after fantasies)
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    I like all women.

    /leaves thread.
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    Probably.
    People from the same background as me are more likely to have similar interests to me, though obviously if I got along with someone from a different background then it wouldn't matter.
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    (Original post by vpsycho)
    I like all women.

    /leaves thread.
    So do I, but I'm saying you're more likely to have more in common with someone from a similar background/culture, so could connect on more than a physical level.
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    To some extent, I wouldn't date a pleb or working class person but race, nationality etc. has no bearing.
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    (Original post by sammynorton90)
    So do I, but I'm saying you're more likely to have more in common with someone from a similar background/culture, so could connect on more than a physical level.
    I'd go with someone with a different background to be honest. I always liked diversity and trying out new things within my life.
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    (Original post by sammynorton90)
    I'm not being racist or snobbish, I'm attracted to girls no matter what race or background they have, but when it comes to forming a long-lasting relationship isn't it more likely you'll marry someone from the same sort of background as you because you'll have more in common and more to talk about. For example if you go out with a foreign girl, if you go to speak to her about one of her favourite shows that they don't have in her country then thats just going to kill the conversation. What do you think?
    Somewhat, yes. I couldn't date someone I had very little in common with, and I do tend to have more in common with those from similar backgrounds. Who doesn't? But I don't think race comes into it, for me it's upbringing. I've dated foreign men, some have had similar upbringings to myself and others have been very upper-class, and their nationality has never been a problem. For me, it's people who haven't been brought up 'properly', don't share some key views, and move in 'different circles' so to speak, who I would struggle to relate to. This may sound very elitist but it's not meant to, I'm just being honest. For example, I couldn't be with someone who wasn't interested in current affairs, wasn't ambitious, and wasn't intelligent. I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with someone like that, just that it wouldn't work for me.
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    I actually don't think it's so much background as the current situation. I'd much rather be with someone who's had different experiences to me that we can share, but at some level you have to relate - e.g. same university/subject/societies/interests or whatnot.

    It's also the case that if I waited for someone with the same background, it might take a while :P
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    (Original post by Blueflare)
    Probably.
    People from the same background as me are more likely to have similar interests to me, though obviously if I got along with someone from a different background then it wouldn't matter.
    Sort of agree, although I stress that class isn't solely about money, it's attitude too.
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    (Original post by .Ali.)
    Somewhat, yes. I couldn't date someone I had very little in common with, and I do tend to have more in common with those from similar backgrounds. Who doesn't? But I don't think race comes into it, for me it's upbringing. I've dated foreign men, some have had similar upbringings to myself and others have been very upper-class, and their nationality has never been a problem. For me, it's people who haven't been brought up 'properly', don't share some key views, and move in 'different circles' so to speak, who I would struggle to relate to. This may sound very elitist but it's not meant to, I'm just being honest. For example, I couldn't be with someone who wasn't interested in current affairs, wasn't ambitious, and wasn't intelligent. I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with someone like that, just that it wouldn't work for me.
    This!

    It's not elitist at all and having those interests/traits are not race exclusive as you pointed out.

    One time a girl said to me "Why are you reading a book, that's boring" (books in general)
    I replied "Why? Because I want to find out what happens next"

    :dontknow:
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    (Original post by Advanced Subsidiary)
    This!

    It's not elitist at all and having those interests/traits are not race exclusive as you pointed out.

    One time a girl said to me "Why are you reading a book, that's boring" (books in general)
    I replied "Why? Because I want to find out what happens next"

    :dontknow:
    Exactly! There was this guy who asked me out without knowing me (obviously I said no) but he asked me what I wanted to do after my A levels, I started talking about the LLB and universities and his face was like :mute: So there is no way at all that it would have worked, simply because we want different things, and upbringing has a huge bearing on that. I hate people who come along saying it's harsh to say things like this.
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    (Original post by .Ali.)
    Exactly! There was this guy who asked me out without knowing me (obviously I said no) but he asked me what I wanted to do after my A levels, I started talking about the LLB and universities and his face was like :mute: So there is no way at all that it would have worked, simply because we want different things, and upbringing has a huge bearing on that. I hate people who come along saying it's harsh to say things like this.
    Yeah I can see where you're coming from. I don't think I would consider being with someone who wanted a life extremely different to mine.. Interests are all fine and dandy as the more diverse interests we have the more things we can talk about.

    However, for me I only enter relationships when I know the person thoroughly and when I feel they are making an effort to achieve their dreams/ambitions...
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    Why do you assume that its only the similarities we can work on to get along with one and other? Working on differences is also cool - in your example, you might not speak the language but can always try your best to learn and enjoy it, no?
    Personally, I have to know the person really well and are making a genuine attempt to try and achieve their ambition, whatever that may be...
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    (Original post by .Ali.)
    Exactly! There was this guy who asked me out without knowing me (obviously I said no) but he asked me what I wanted to do after my A levels, I started talking about the LLB and universities and his face was like :mute: So there is no way at all that it would have worked, simply because we want different things, and upbringing has a huge bearing on that. I hate people who come along saying it's harsh to say things like this.
    Would you date someone that wasn't academic, but was really passionate and ambitious about the field in which they wanted to work. Like an artist, actor, stand up comedian or something?
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    (Original post by sammynorton90)
    I'm not being racist or snobbish, I'm attracted to girls no matter what race or background they have, but when it comes to forming a long-lasting relationship isn't it more likely you'll marry someone from the same sort of background as you because you'll have more in common and more to talk about. For example if you go out with a foreign girl, if you go to speak to her about one of her favourite shows that they don't have in her country then thats just going to kill the conversation. What do you think?
    - Have more in common: YES
    - Have more to talk about: NO, talking to girls from different backgrounds is exactly the same, in other words you can always find things to talk about :rolleyes:.


    (Original post by DeepStar)
    Why do you assume that its only the similarities we can work on to get along with one and other? Working on differences is also cool - in your example, you might not speak the language but can always try your best to learn and enjoy it, no?
    Personally, I have to know the person really well and are making a genuine attempt to try and achieve their ambition, whatever that may be...
    At the beginning yes, you enjoy the differences, but later on NO because in the long run you wish from your relationship to give you a feeling of security, which is only possible when you are in harmony with your partner. Having differences makes the relation unstable, you may be able to deal with the differences some time, but not always. And I'm talking from personal experience :cool:.

    The girl I am going to marry soon has a similar background to mine
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    I'm not sure if you're talking about social class or whatever, but personally that isn't something I take into consideration in relationships at all, and I don't know why I would. Also, I would go out with someone from a foreign country, as long as I met them here/if I was abroad long term. I don't want a holiday fling sort of thing. I don't really think of it as a lack of similarities, but more a chance to broaden my own experiences.
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    (Original post by asdfg0987)
    To some extent, I wouldn't date a pleb or working class person but race, nationality etc. has no bearing.
    You wouldn't date a working class person? Why? And what consititutes working class for you?
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    (Original post by sammynorton90)
    I'm not being racist or snobbish, I'm attracted to girls no matter what race or background they have, but when it comes to forming a long-lasting relationship isn't it more likely you'll marry someone from the same sort of background as you because you'll have more in common and more to talk about. For example if you go out with a foreign girl, if you go to speak to her about one of her favourite shows that they don't have in her country then thats just going to kill the conversation. What do you think?
    Same boat as you, mate. But the main reason for me is culture differences
 
 
 
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