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    Me and my ex have the same friends which causes quite a few problems. We broke up about a month ago but things are still pretty raw and whilst I'm happy being civil with her I dont want to be around here on nights out etc.

    Tonight I've been asked to go out with the friends which we both share, but she has also been invited. Since it is me who doesnt want to see her, I sent her a text asking if she was going and if she was that I wouldnt.... to which she replied saying that I'm pathetic and being ridiculous by even asking her.

    I dont see why shes being such a d**k about simply things like this, its a yes or no answer, either shes going and i dont, or she isnt and I do! But instead feels the need to insult and piss me off!

    Any suggestions as to why shes being such a b**ch?!
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    ...because your text message was pathetic?
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    Jeez, just go reguardless. Have fun and hang with your mates. It's her who'll have the problem rather than you if you go and she kicks off.
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    and she's being the *****? lol grow a pair
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    if you hadn't put the whole if you go i won't thing in there then she might not have insulted you
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    Because you're being pathetic? Why would you let someone affect you like this?
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    Go have fun with your friends. You don't have to have lengthy conversations with her just be civil and stay out of her way.
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    Yeah I think you've made it pretty awkward by sending the text message. Couldn't you have not just avoided her even if she did turn up, and hung around with more of your closer friends in the group?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    ...because your text message was pathetic?
    This.
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    I don't know who's the bigger *****, you or her.
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    We have tried already to go out and be civil but it doesnt work, she will intentionally do things to piss me off infront of my face. I dont see the point lying to myself and acting like I'm ok with her being a slut infront of me so to save the hassle its easier to go out with my mates when she isnt there
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    Sounds like she's trying to be civil and get over the whole thing - understands that you will see eachother, and the sooner you get over that, the better. But sounds like you are either trying to completely avoid her (not going to happen when you share friends) or you are trying to annoy her about it.

    Either way, its best you go regardless. If you are trying to avoid her, don't. You obviously don't feel the need to completely cut contact because you text her, so there's no need to avoid being in the same room as her. And if you are trying to annoy her, then don't. It is just ridiculous and pathetic, and there is no need to make a big deal about something that isn't.
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    (Original post by twelve)
    Sounds like she's trying to be civil and get over the whole thing - understands that you will see eachother, and the sooner you get over that, the better. But sounds like you are either trying to completely avoid her (not going to happen when you share friends) or you are trying to annoy her about it.

    Either way, its best you go regardless. If you are trying to avoid her, don't. You obviously don't feel the need to completely cut contact because you text her, so there's no need to avoid being in the same room as her. And if you are trying to annoy her, then don't. It is just ridiculous and pathetic, and there is no need to make a big deal about something that isn't.
    I dont want to annoy her in the slightest, I just dont particularly want to be around her because of my opinion of her. I'm not trying to avoid her either, she said that we are going to bump into each other sometime, which we do anyway, and that isnt a problem at all, actually I bumped into her yesterday, made small talk and it was fine! I just dont particularly want to spend the whole night around my ex, surely thats understandable.
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    because she is a ***** by the sounds of it.. nowt you can do except avoid mate, and try not to let her actions/comments effect ye
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I dont want to annoy her in the slightest, I just dont particularly want to be around her because of my opinion of her. I'm not trying to avoid her either, she said that we are going to bump into each other sometime, which we do anyway, and that isnt a problem at all, actually I bumped into her yesterday, made small talk and it was fine! I just dont particularly want to spend the whole night around my ex, surely thats understandable.
    Now you're making it sound like you aren't bothered if you see her.

    Basically, the problem is the way you phrased the message. You can find out from someone else if she's going, there's no need to contact her.
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    (Original post by twelve)
    Now you're making it sound like you aren't bothered if you see her.

    Basically, the problem is the way you phrased the message. You can find out from someone else if she's going, there's no need to contact her.
    No it isnt. I am bothered about seeing her in the sense of spending the whole night hanging around with our friends with her, i couldnt care less if i see her in the street, i just dont want to spend the night around her. I cant find out from others, I already tried that and they didnt know as she hadnt responded to them either!

    Surely like I said in the first post that it would have been easier for her to simply say 'yes' or 'no', than cause this complexity.
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    It's your own fault for the way you phrased it.

    She probably doesn't see it as an issue that you're going places together or she's trying to make the effort not to see it as an issue for your mutual friends and you should be making the same effort rather than trying to avoid her. It's only awkward if you make it awkward.
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    From what you've said, i think your being the bigger b**ch here, and your making the situation awkward. Why would you even care if she's going? fair enough you want to avoid her, but if you carry on your basically asking your mutual friends to choose. Me or her?..
    She'll come across as the better option aswell, unless you make a point of showing you really don't give a care.

    Just go out with your friends, and if she's there, be polite and do your own thing, if she acts up and makes things awkward, your friends won't judge you for not wanting to be around her, and avoiding her.
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    Let me guess.. she dumped you, right? :P

    You may think that she's a *****, but she's right. If you're asking about such things, you are not being civil. You're being pathetic.

    Live and let live. Whether she goes or not, just don't mind her and enjoy the night.
 
 
 
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