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I'm a perfectionist and too put-together watch

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    I spend too much of my time working and focusing on work, I won't stop until I get tip-top A grades, and it seems like I need a routine of perfection all the time. I don't even need A grades for uni, all I need is BBC for my type of course. I just can't settle for any less. I've been like this my whole life and I sometimes think I work too hard/focus on work too much and think it's the be all end all of my life.I just don't know how to have fun without it being "organised time" to have fun. I never let go and relax. I'm either completely organised, or a complete shambles when I'm not. I can never be one of those people that can just go and have fun without being a goodie two shoes.

    I'm also a pessimist and I'm scared of what the future will bring. I also seem to be pretty scared of people. It gets bad, even walking down the street is a mission, I'm extremely paranoid, I can't let go!

    Any advice people?
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    Wish I was more like you.
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    Write a will.
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    (Original post by Student)
    Wish I was more like you.
    I seriously hope I'm not like this at Uni, I need to let go a bit more! It's not good
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    perhaps choose a better course/uni that requires AAA then?
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    What does 'too put together' mean?
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    (Original post by Superstar6318)
    I seriously hope I'm not like this at Uni, I need to let go a bit more! It's not good
    Being super-organised will help you at uni, and help you get through the work-load.
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    (Original post by Student)
    Being super-organised will help you at uni, and help you get through the work-load.
    Good point. This sounds so silly and TSR-boffin-like, but the degree I'm doing isn't the most academic so I may complain it's not academic enough, but if I was doing a generic and academic degree like English I would complain that I should have done a more "fun" degree.

    It's a no-win situation
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    (Original post by goewyn)
    What does 'too put together' mean?
    As in I'm too organised, and don't seem relaxed and carefree
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    (Original post by Superstar6318)
    Good point. This sounds so silly and TSR-boffin-like, but the degree I'm doing isn't the most academic so I may complain it's not academic enough, but if I was doing a generic and academic degree like English I would complain that I should have done a more "fun" degree.

    It's a no-win situation
    Hard-work always pays off! You've got me curious about what course you're doing btw :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by Student)
    Hard-work always pays off! You've got me curious about what course you're doing btw :rolleyes:
    Primary Education, I want to be a teacher
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    I'd just be careful of becoming too obsessive and ritualistic - it can lead to OCD. I suspect you have OCPD at the moment which is actually fairly common but a big risk-factor for OCD.
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    [QUOTE=Superstar6318;30399427]I spend too much of my time working and focusing on work, I won't stop until I get tip-top A grades, and it seems like I need a routine of perfection all the time. I don't even need A grades for uni, all I need is BBC for my type of course. I just can't settle for any less. I've been like this my whole life and I sometimes think I work too hard/focus on work too much and think it's the be all end all of my life.I just don't know how to have fun without it being "organised time" to have fun. I never let go and relax. I'm either completely organised, or a complete shambles when I'm not. I can never be one of those people that can just go and have fun without being a goodie two shoes.

    I'm also a pessimist and I'm scared of what the future will bring. I also seem to be pretty scared of people. It gets bad, even walking down the street is a mission, I'm extremely paranoid, I can't let go!

    Any advice people?[/QUOTE

    i feel the exact same way. this need to get everything exactly right and perfect is driving me mad!!!!!and the problem with us is that we're negative perfectionists (i know i know wiki's not a good source but it gives you a quick overview of the psychology of perfectionism so do check it out), focusing on the bad things and letting it run our lives. I'm not sure about you but i have this extreme fear of failure and i guess the only advice that i can give you is to make a conscious effort to be a positive perfectionist=)the one good thing about having OCD and being a perfectionist is that we're more driven/motivated to do stuff,although not necessarily always true in my case because my fears can be quite paralysing and i end up just procrastinating everything
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    [QUOTE=defying_gravity;30400083]
    (Original post by Superstar6318)
    I spend too much of my time working and focusing on work, I won't stop until I get tip-top A grades, and it seems like I need a routine of perfection all the time. I don't even need A grades for uni, all I need is BBC for my type of course. I just can't settle for any less. I've been like this my whole life and I sometimes think I work too hard/focus on work too much and think it's the be all end all of my life.I just don't know how to have fun without it being "organised time" to have fun. I never let go and relax. I'm either completely organised, or a complete shambles when I'm not. I can never be one of those people that can just go and have fun without being a goodie two shoes.

    I'm also a pessimist and I'm scared of what the future will bring. I also seem to be pretty scared of people. It gets bad, even walking down the street is a mission, I'm extremely paranoid, I can't let go!

    Any advice people?[/QUOTE

    i feel the exact same way. this need to get everything exactly right and perfect is driving me mad!!!!!and the problem with us is that we're negative perfectionists (i know i know wiki's not a good source but it gives you a quick overview of the psychology of perfectionism so do check it out), focusing on the bad things and letting it run our lives. I'm not sure about you but i have this extreme fear of failure and i guess the only advice that i can give you is to make a conscious effort to be a positive perfectionist=)the one good thing about having OCD and being a perfectionist is that we're more driven/motivated to do stuff,although not necessarily always true in my case because my fears can be quite paralysing and i end up just procrastinating everything
    Yeah I think failure for myself is the be all end all!
    When I'm being lazy then I think about work even still. And sometimes I'm too scared to start work and end up doing it in a rubbish way just for the sake of saying I'm working
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    (Original post by Superstar6318)
    Primary Education, I want to be a teacher
    Correct me if I'm wrong but can't you do Primary Ed joint with a 'more academic' subject? That way you've got the best of both worlds. Might work for you
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    (Original post by aeterno)
    Correct me if I'm wrong but can't you do Primary Ed joint with a 'more academic' subject? That way you've got the best of both worlds. Might work for you
    I have one offer, there's no specialism for it, although the uni I'm going to for it is reputable. They said the course is a mixture of academics and vocation, and that their teaching methods are academic, it's a 9-5 day of lectures/seminars/workshops every day

    I keep having doubts, and I don't know why I always do
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    (Original post by Superstar6318)
    I have one offer, there's no specialism for it, although the uni I'm going to for it is reputable. They said the course is a mixture of academics and vocation, and that their teaching methods are academic, it's a 9-5 day of lectures/seminars/workshops every day

    I keep having doubts, and I don't know why I always do
    That sounds really good! It seems like the kind of mixture that's suited to you as well.

    I can understand your concerns but just try not to overthink things (I know, easier said than done...). Just tell yourself every day that the course is perfect you and so it should be if it's something you really want to do. I get that feeling that whatever you do you're going to feel like you're missing out on something better but tell yourself this is the best way to achieve exactly what you want to do. If you're interested in the learning side alone of academic subjects, then sit in a few lectures, read up on whatever interests you in your spare time. Being a perfectionist is a good thing in most cases but just remind yourself that you'll change what you can and let go of what you can't.

    Sounds silly but repeating it out loud on a daily basis can help. You'll possibly also laugh at how silly you feel doing so
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    (Original post by aeterno)
    That sounds really good! It seems like the kind of mixture that's suited to you as well.

    I can understand your concerns but just try not to overthink things (I know, easier said than done...). Just tell yourself every day that the course is perfect you and so it should be if it's something you really want to do. I get that feeling that whatever you do you're going to feel like you're missing out on something better but tell yourself this is the best way to achieve exactly what you want to do. If you're interested in the learning side alone of academic subjects, then sit in a few lectures, read up on whatever interests you in your spare time. Being a perfectionist is a good thing in most cases but just remind yourself that you'll change what you can and let go of what you can't.

    Sounds silly but repeating it out loud on a daily basis can help. You'll possibly also laugh at how silly you feel doing so
    This advice is so helpful, thank you x
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    Organize your work and everything else. Then the time that isn't organized for work, you have fun. Simple.
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    What's wrong with being a perfectionist, other than the fact that you are bound to disappoint yourself?

    I'm one, and so far, I'm getting what I want in life.
 
 
 
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