I'm pretty interested from a bloke's perspective really on how difficult you find saying those 3 words? I know it's harder for a bloke because I believe it's an emotionally difficult thing to do, almost like a form of commitment!
I know for some blokes, they'll say it interpreted in another way, like 'I really care about you so so much babe', or 'you mean so much to me, you're the light of my life'. I had this brief discussion with my boyfriend of 4 months (which is early I know, and im in no rush for him to say this, its in his own time) and he said it's a massive thing to say in a relationship and he wants to be 100% sure when he feels right to say it because the last girl he said it to kinda fooked him over basically (not cheating).
How long was it before you said it to your boyfriend/girlfriend,and would you still stay with someone after 12 months even if they still hadn't said it yet?
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Saying 'I love You' for the first time - how easy is it for you? watch
- Thread Starter
- 19-03-2011 14:58
- 19-03-2011 14:59
- 19-03-2011 15:04
I've been with mine 2 months or so. Assuming it works out...it really depends on how my feelings change and what the rate is. Personally it is a very meaningful thing to say and I wouldn't just say it in a half hearted "I love you babe" sort of way. 12 months...I'd probably have said it, and be rather disheartened if they didn't seem to return the sentiment.
- 19-03-2011 15:08
Yeah, I think those 3 words kinda lose their meaning if said many times and/or halfheartedly in a single relationship? :/
- Thread Starter
- 19-03-2011 15:14
Completely agree that saying it too often probably loses it's true meaning, but what if they never said it atall?
Joey - I think that's the fear with some people - that if they say it to their respective partner, they won't say it back. There has been a couple of moments were i've gone to say 'i'll still love ya even if ya grew your hair' (a conversation we had about him growing his hair longer), but i managed to stop myself from saying it and said 'i'll still find you fit if.....'. I feel like ive gone past the 'caring from someone so much' phase and i'm beyond that. You see, the equivalent of 3 months for one couple, is like 12 months for another. The reason why i say that is because i met my current boyfriend in the houseshare we live in 4 months ago and have spent pretty much every day together, most of the day (we do our own things seperately of course) but we just get on brilliantly and hence the time we spend together. So we've probably had the equivalent of like 50 dates compared to another couple, lol.
- 19-03-2011 15:27
my boyfriend said this almost 3 months in! we were cuddling and he said, "I do love you, you know."
i freaked out a little as i was trying hard not to get attached so soon.
so i was like. "oh that's nice......." but then he said he was serious, and i said he barely knew me. you can't know someone enough in 3 months can you? he said he loved me from the start. Can only be infatuation. I did say i love you about a month after. I felt very strongly for him.
- 19-03-2011 15:39
My boyfriend hasn't said it to me yet =) We've been together for nearly 3 months and since I did all the chasing and asked him out I'm determined for him to say it first. Hehe.
I'm not really bothered about "those three words", its not a big deal for me to say it and doesn't imply additional commitment, but I realise for some people (and yes it does seem to be men in my experience) it is a massive deal.