Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

I was a *****. He dumped me. Is there anything I can do now to get him back? :( watch

    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I was with my boyfriend for a year in a long-distance thing. We used to have a good, sort of regular fortnightly sexual activity. Then for the following 10-11 months, our contact become much much less and infrequent but we were still together and I gave him no bj, no hj, no sex. I guess not intentionally because I had things going on in my life and my drive was getting reduced by (personal, he never caused it) sadness but partly intentional. So almost a year later when I could see him more regularly, I carried on still not giving him sexual activity (I was still sad in regards to my home life but I could get out more for uni, etc, but I guess that's no excuse), so I broke my promise of going on the pill and one day he just said i've understood for long enough, I loved you but I don't seem to be making you any better, you don't need a boyfriend, and left. I know I didn't satisfy him enough anyway, and certainly not sexually, no where near sexually, poor guy, only now do I finally understand what he gave up for me, staying with me and supporting me through all of that, and I gave him nothing. I felt like I couldn't, but I just didn't. He was right to leave me, but is there anything I can do to get him back? He loved me so much and I love him too and i've only now realised how much and how hard I made things for him now that he's gone. Help me please
    Offline

    13
    (Original post by OneLessLonelyGirl)
    I was with my boyfriend for a year in a long-distance thing. We used to have a good, sort of regular fortnightly sexual activity. Then for the following 10-11 months, our contact become much much less and infrequent but we were still together and I gave him no bj, no hj, no sex. I guess not intentionally because I had things going on in my life and my drive was getting reduced by (personal, he never caused it) sadness but partly intentional. So almost a year later when I could see him more regularly, I carried on still not giving him sexual activity (I was still sad in regards to my home life but I could get out more for uni, etc, but I guess that's no excuse), so I broke my promise of going on the pill and one day he just said i've understood for long enough, I loved you but I don't seem to be making you any better, you don't need a boyfriend, and left. I know I didn't satisfy him enough anyway, and certainly not sexually, no where near sexually, poor guy, only now do I finally understand what he gave up for me, staying with me and supporting me through all of that, and I gave him nothing. I felt like I couldn't, but I just didn't. He was right to leave me, but is there anything I can do to get him back? He loved me so much and I love him too and i've only now realised how much and how hard I made things for him now that he's gone. Help me please
    Tough, you had the chance, didn't use it wisely and so you lost it.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by im so academic)
    Tough, you had the chance, didn't use it widely and so you lost it.
    It's wisely.
    Holy ****! I just corrected 'im so academic'! OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG !
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    the only thing you can do to get another chance is ask. so ask and tell him all of this but understand that it might not go how you want
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by im so academic)
    Tough, you had the chance, didn't use it widely and so you lost it.


    I'm an idiot. People like that aren't going to come around again are they? And here I was being too cautious to jump in with 2 feet and trust him that he'd save me and look after me and even though taking the pill was the right thing because he wanted me to, and inside I did too, I didn't. I'm the reason for my own loss. I made my bed, better go lie in it. Thanks for the reply
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by OneLessLonelyGirl)
    I was with my boyfriend for a year in a long-distance thing. We used to have a good, sort of regular fortnightly sexual activity. Then for the following 10-11 months, our contact become much much less and infrequent but we were still together and I gave him no bj, no hj, no sex. I guess not intentionally because I had things going on in my life and my drive was getting reduced by (personal, he never caused it) sadness but partly intentional. So almost a year later when I could see him more regularly, I carried on still not giving him sexual activity (I was still sad in regards to my home life but I could get out more for uni, etc, but I guess that's no excuse), so I broke my promise of going on the pill and one day he just said i've understood for long enough, I loved you but I don't seem to be making you any better, you don't need a boyfriend, and left. I know I didn't satisfy him enough anyway, and certainly not sexually, no where near sexually, poor guy, only now do I finally understand what he gave up for me, staying with me and supporting me through all of that, and I gave him nothing. I felt like I couldn't, but I just didn't. He was right to leave me, but is there anything I can do to get him back? He loved me so much and I love him too and i've only now realised how much and how hard I made things for him now that he's gone. Help me please
    you were just difficult that's all. if you want him back just show him how you've reformed yourself. that's all that can be done.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Ape Gone Insane)
    I think that just probably translates to "I've understood for long enough now, not getting enough sex and I've found someone else who will satisfy me and not be a *****. Going to get some now, bye".
    I don't blame him. I should have satisfied him more, a lot more. I made his life so hard. I hope he's okay right now
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    Are you still on speaking terms? Try and contact him and tell him you're sorry, and explain you were going through a hard time and you didnt want it to turn out this way. It might work :hugs:
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Ape Gone Insane)
    Boys need sex, yo. You've been withholding it. :whip:
    Shall I sleep with him from now as regularly as I can then? Not just that, do more as a girlfriend to be appreciative? Will he listen and be with me or say how many more chances do I need to give you? How many times will you say that? When will all this magical balance come in? I'm scared it's guna be the latter
    Offline

    13
    (Original post by OneLessLonelyGirl)


    I'm an idiot. People like that aren't going to come around again are they? And here I was being too cautious to jump in with 2 feet and trust him that he'd save me and look after me and even though taking the pill was the right thing because he wanted me to, and inside I did too, I didn't. I'm the reason for my own loss. I made my bed, better go lie in it. Thanks for the reply
    Exactly. You made an action, so you receive the consequences. And you can never reclaim time back, so what can you do now?

    Move on. That is the most realistic option.
    • #1
    #1

    In fairness, she's being really reasonable now. Most girls are too selfish and self-absorbed to realise that it's their fault.

    Have to say though, I can't see it working out second time round. Once bitten, twice shy and all that. I think move on and find someone else.
    Offline

    2
    There is only one thing that will bring him back............................ .....but you are going to need loads of lubrication.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    But you have beiber fever!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Become a slutty ***** and he might take you back for a night.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by OneLessLonelyGirl)
    Shall I sleep with him from now as regularly as I can then? Not just that, do more as a girlfriend to be appreciative? Will he listen and be with me or say how many more chances do I need to give you? How many times will you say that? When will all this magical balance come in? I'm scared it's guna be the latter
    You're not supposed to sleep with him to keep him happy you;'re supposed to sleep with him because you want to .

    DO you have a really low sex drive or something, I'd of thought someone depressed would welcome a distraction from it all especially since you had the guy you loved to share it with right there for you and since the sole purpose of sex is supposed t be pleasure and showing your love.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: March 20, 2011
Poll
Do you agree with the PM's proposal to cut tuition fees for some courses?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.