I'm in my 2nd year at uni now and I was going to live with my friend and her boyfriend next year - this was her idea in the first place. She wanted to rent privately instead of looking round student houses, then her dad offered to buy us a house and rent it out to us. Great right? Not so much. I was then told that he might not be able to afford a house for all three of us. I thought, 'well that's OK, my friend won't just leave me'.
I was wrong. Two weeks ago she told me that her dad couldn't afford a house with room for me and she HAD to take the offer. I couldn't believe that my best friend was going to abandon me for a house and it didn't quite sink in until about four days ago. It's really bugging me. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I'm angry all the time and she's barely said a word to me since I was told that she was taking the offer. There was no discussion either, I was just told. I've spent the past few nights crying and when I rang another friend for advice I ended up crying at her too and I don't ever cry.
I'm not a very confrontational person so I left her a note three days ago asking her not to accept her dad's offer. I don't know if she read it but I've barely seen her since and she hasn't said anything about it. I can't cope with it anymore, it's starting to make me ill and I daren't talk to her incase I get nasty because at this point I think I will. I'm not the most tactful person and I don't want to make things worse for myself.
Am I just being selfish in not wanting her to have a house or am I justified in my outrage? Any advice would be great.
Friend told me I wasn't going to be living with her next year Watch
- Thread Starter
- 19-03-2011 19:45
- 19-03-2011 20:48
You are indeed being selfish.
People will usually choose their partners over everyone else. It's part of life, get used to it.
- 19-03-2011 20:59
Try being a friend and be happy for her.
Would you really want to be the third wheel anyway?
- 19-03-2011 21:10
you are being very selfish, her dad is offering to rent her a house, so she knows it'll be decent. obviously if you stayed with her it would have to be two bedrooms, with her boyfriend it only has to be one, therefore cheaper, which is all her dad can afford.
your friend obviously feels really bad about this hence the not speaking to you bit... also writing a note to her begging not to accept the offer sounds pathetic and really unfair.
grow up. she's not "abondoning" you, seriously.
- 19-03-2011 21:34
Being student allows you to be random, jump at every opportunity to meet new people and try new things so whilst I get you are upset she left you, its not the end of the world. Because you are hung up on it, seems to me that you haven't branched out, well this is your chance. Live with people who you aren't 'great' friends with but you have a good time when you are with them. I do think you have overreacted a tad.
- 19-03-2011 21:44
Bit selfish OP, she obviously wants to try and have a normal household with her partner and to me this says that they are getting serious with their relationship, so quit being a cow and be happy for her.