Overdue virgins: what do your parents think of your condition?

Yeah because Freud never spoke about sex did he ?

Freud generally saw sex as the motivation for most things. That was the point, so, to quote Eli Porter "step down off the pedestal".

No, no, no. You see, you wrote that Freud thought that sex was the motivation for all things. I don't believe that Freud EVER (literally, EVER) said anything approximating that.

Freud thought that sex was an important component of development, or that sex was the unconscious motivation (motivation in this case is closer in meaning to "cause") for things like slips of the tongue, repression, amnesia, neurosis, etc. But he did NOT think that sex was a motivation in terms of what, I think, you meant motivation (i.e. working out, getting a nice haircut, being really a good at martial arts and putting it in your sig., say).

Shouldn't make comments about Freud when you've not actually READ any, you know?

Where did I sat that Freud thought sex was the motivation for all things? I used the term 'Freudian' loosely, and made no such absolute statement. Also, cause and motivation are closely linked as causes tend to motivate action.

I've actually read some Freud. And you're putting words in my mouth. Also, that comment about martial arts was weak and unnecessary. Your scathing attacks on me are completely unprovoked as well, and I don't intend to bite the bullet. What's the beef?

Still, I suppose one has to watch out for the Freud police on TSR. Sorry that you feel so passionately about the man. I'm sure he wouldn't turn in his grave about it though, and I never claimed to be an expert on the man.

Not all. I guess you could say that long-term virgins fall into three broad groups.

- Chosen celibacy, either to focus on other things such as work/study/family, which involves resisting and suppressing sexual desires.

How do you know that you don't like sex if you've never had it?

Maybe they just don't fancy it?
Thats like saying, "Have you had sex with a little child? No? Well you could still be a peadophile, you just don't know it yet."

You don't need to have sex in order to know that you have a sexual attraction to someone or some thing.

Most of those who force themselves not to have sex are resisting urges and repressing their sexuality with the idea that they are somehow doing themselves good.

To me, it seems ludicrous to choose a life of celibacy just so you can focus on work/study/family. Having sex once every so often, isn't going to take up so much of your time that you don't have time to work or study but that's what you're suggesting.

It's like saying, oh to get more work and studying done, I'm going to give up chocolate. Then obviously I'll have more time to study if I'm not eating chocolate. .

Resisting and suppressing sexual desires is unhealthy and harmful, if anything that is going to affect work and studying more.

not at all. sex isnt as simple as going out and buying chocolate. most of those people above would want it in the context of a relationship only, and think the relationship and relationship maintenece would take up too mcuh time. your partner beceomes your priority and everythign else fita around them.

in teh Bible it says the single persons priority is God and Gods works but the married persons priority is family.

do you have anything to back this up? i am celibate and fine, and 25 yrs old, so are many of my myuslim friends. surely you could ask the girl who has been pumped and dumped by a playah if it affects her study and concentration. or the girl who has an abortion or STD if it is harmful physically or emotionally. this doresnt apply in all cases but it is a risk you take.

But you are still missing out on a big aspect of life (arguably from a Darwinian/Freudian perspective the only real objective of life - procreation).

One is rarely an impulsive innovator after the age of sixty, but one can still be a very fine orderly and inventive thinker. One rarely procreates children at that age, but one is all the more skilled at educating those who have already been procreated, and education is procreation of another kind.

I am only referring to those, obviously those who want to but can't, there's a logical reason.

To me, it seems ludicrous to choose a life of celibacy just so you can focus on work/study/family. Having sex once every so often, isn't going to take up so much of your time that you don't have time to work or study but that's what you're suggesting.

It's like saying, oh to get more work and studying done, I'm going to give up chocolate. Then obviously I'll have more time to study if I'm not eating chocolate.

Resisting and suppressing sexual desires is unhealthy and harmful, if anything that is going to affect work and studying more.

Ask anyone who's sexually frustrated if they can concentrate on studying. Then ask them after they've had sex.

Such as what?

How do you know that you don't like sex if you've never had it?

Why not? Infact, why can't you do all that and also enjoy sex? You make it sound like you can only do one or the other, they're not mutually exclusive.

I'm not lacking in anything, I live my life to the full unlike a lot of people.