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My girlfriend is asking questions I really don't want to answer. watch

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    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    But it is uncommon to act like they simply never existed.
    You do remember I said something to the effect of: "I could pass old school friends on the street and not even notice them"?

    Just say it as it is, you lost contact with most people from school (true), you never made any lasting friends there (true) and everyone has drifted apart and doing their own thing (true).

    Could always mention you don't remember much from school (probably a bit of a fib given your experiences but hey, there is no reason she needs to know anything more than that school was a time in your past and you've moved on from it, which isn;t a fib).

    Best of luck.

    Edit: BTW first and second year of high school I was pretty much a nobody. and while I don't have your experiences at all...lets just say my parents are not genetic relations and leave it at that.

    Suffice to say I know (an albeit) pathetically small sample of the life you had and even though everyone else has done it, I want to say I am impressed how far you've come. If I ended up in a psychiatric hospital chances are I wouldn't be coming out.

    Kudos
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    If she truly is amazing like you say, then she would be moved by your story and like you even more for how you have recovered the way you have, if she doesnt accept you for your past then she obviously isnt amazing like you say.
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    (Original post by Studentus-anonymous)
    Just say it as it is, you lost contact with most people from school (true), you never made any lasting friends there (true) and everyone has drifted apart and doing their own thing (true).
    This (I don't think it is that uncommon - it certainly would be true for me and I don't have a "mysterious past"). In addition, tell her you have fallen out with your parents (true). I think that covers everything.

    You can give her more details whenever you are comfortable with doing that, but so long as you are not, just don't.
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    This should be made into a film. I'd love for it to result in you becoming Mr Universe, or most likely an actor, singer, or aspiring author/ scientist. Of course with a little literary flexibility .
    Speilberg to direct. Brad Pitt to star as you. Emily Blunt to star as your girlfriend/ future wife. Ted Levine (Evolution/Hannibal/Shutter Island) to star as the rapist. Stanley Tucci as inspirational teacher/ mentor. Meryl Streep and Pierce Brosnan to star as your parents, respectively.

    Oscar in the making...



    N.B. I'll probably be negged for this, but this is truly moving and you should be proud of yourself for this. You are really inspiring.
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    (Original post by *Boofle*)
    I agree with this. Have you been following the 'just got shown gf's blog.. should i be worried??' thread by any chance? It's obvious that girl has some kind of traumatic past which she's not willing to share with her boyfriend, and like OP used the internet as an outlet. These things must be handled very delicately, so spilling the beans immediately isn't a good idea IMO until you know you can trust her.
    Ah cheers for the support, no I haven't, what's the link? didn't show up in search under those words. I reckon its less about trusting her and more about trusting yourself to divulge such information without getting sucked into a mental trauma. Still though glad we're on the same wavelength here.
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    OP, props to you for getting your life back on track after all that. It can't have been easy, and only someone with a really strong mental fortitude could have coped with that the way you have. I echo other posters by saying that you are certainly an inspiration to me - I thought my past had been pretty ****, but reading that puts it all into perspective for me.

    As for your girlfriend, it depends how long you've been together really. You might not want to tell her everything now, so just say that you have some issues with your parents, and that no "schoolfriends" are on your FB as you didn't really have any as such, so it wasn't worth adding them, or something like that (all truth here).

    If anything she'll understand and back off until/if you wish to tell her anything else. Barring a few idiots on here, we all salute you, and we don't even personally know you. If she reacts badly then that is her problem and something that she needs to deal with.

    We all feel for you OP
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    (Original post by Anonymous)

    When I got to the hospital I met someone. We became really close, and I ended up hanging out with her for pretty much my entire stay. We made each other a promise that we'd both support the other, and become awesome.

    One month after I was released, she hung herself. I had been visiting every day but I didn't see the signs, it was pretty bad. Nearly destroyed me in fact, but I'd made her a promise. I guess I wanted to get better for both of us. So she'd be proud of me? I dunno. I still wear her ring around my neck everywhere I go.

    This is why I got my results so quickly. Every time I think like something is too difficult, or a waste of time, I look at the ring, think about her, and what she'd think of me if I just quit. Then I snap out of the pity party and go do whatever I was too much of a wuss to do before that moment.
    I'm not going to lie, that actually moved me, especially the writing in bold. Have you managed to actually talk to your girlfriend yet, OP? I'd really like to know how it works out for you, seeing as you've had so much support on here even behind your veil of anonymity.
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    (Original post by Casinomaster)
    Hey mate,

    I think you're awesome, there aren't many people who could go through what you have and pull through it. Massive respect!

    As for the girlfriend, she clearly digs you for who you are now, I understand why you don't want to dig up the past and you're worried how she might react but I think you should give her a chance. If she's as special as you believe her to be she will appreciate your honesty and understand why you haven't wanted to talk about it. It's a tough one, you recognise that she's asking legit questions and if it's turning into something serious you're going to have to talk about it a little. Having read and thought about your post I don't feel sorry for for...just admiration, I suspect she'll feel the same and realise what a cool guy you are.

    Good luck!
    I wholly agree with this. What happened in your life is sad reminds me of my own ****ed up childhood in some ways, but YOU ARE INSPIRING. I haven't turned around my life from my past...it still shadows me. You are awesome to have come so far. She should respect you for that. If you don't want to tell her everything now; tell her a little bit. You have a rough/abusive past and it's hard to talk about, but eventually (if you plan to eventually) you'll tell her. It also depends on how long you've been together and how much you trust her. I know what it's like to trust people with a painful past, but you're strong you've proved that. I know you have what it takes to pull through this too, and I hope she's as wonderful as you describe because that means she'll understand and respect and love you for the person you've become too.
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    Awesome story. Very inspiring! Good luck with the 'talk'.
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    I am also curious as to whether you have spoken to your gf yet. If not I hope it goes ok no matter what you say
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    Wow, what a totally moving story.
    Really admire your strength and determination to turn your life around, well done :-)

    I think your girlfriend would totally understand if you told her this. Thats if you wanted to tell her, could always just keep the past in the past. If you did tell her she may actually feel happy that you could open up to her that much?
 
 
 
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