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Stupidest facebook statuses watch

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    Inspired from this thread

    http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/show...1#post30429939

    All people seem to use it for is to tell everyone else the most pointless things about their everyday life, whether it's what they're eating, if they're going to take a dump or walking their dog, which is someone's brand new status on mine.

    So share everybody
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    lamebook.com has loads of good ones
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    The most stupid facebook statuses could never live up to the inane threads that make up half of the H+R forum on here. Not quite as many rampant teenage hormones sprayed all over facebook
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    (Original post by Ape Gone Insane)
    'My mommy won't let me fist her. '

    Should have been visit.
    lol thats a good one!
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    let other people do whatever the hell they like on their facebook. no one is forcing you to read it
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    There usually some funny ones on here. http://failbook.failblog.org/
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    This type annoys me:
    "Mmmm Pub Lunch With *person*. Hello Roast"

    I've blocked that person's statuses from appearing on my news feed, so when I saw this thread I went on their profile and sure enough, an inane status, just as I was expecting.
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    I'm so bloody sick of Facebook threads.

    Britain has officially turned into a country of childish imbeciles.
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    "I love my 'gyal' sooo much."
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    (Original post by Ape Gone Insane)
    X is single. (Monday)

    "I hate men." - 25 comments "I agree men are crap11231" (Monday)

    *Song lyrics about being single* (Monday night)

    *Vaguely philosophical statement about the universe* (Monday night)

    X is in a relationship with Y (Tuesday afternoon)

    "I love Y. We're going to be together forever <3 <3 <3"
    Argh you got there before me! Couldn't agree more!
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    This isn't that stupid but it annoyed me so it must go on

    **** ********
    If your ugly put this on you status and who ever likes dissagrees ? :')
    about an hour ago

    -________________-
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    About an hour ago:

    "X is walking down Y Street"
    ....
    "X is walking down W Street"
    ....
    "X is almost home!"
    ....
    "X is finally home!"

    Why? WHY?! :rolleyes:
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    Just saw something about someone being too afraid to pick up a spider they'd just drowned in case it was feigning death. I cannot breathe. :lol:
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    A few months ago, a male 'friend' wrote: "Finally lost my virginity!"

    Just minutes later his girlfriend commented it, saying "Why the **** have you put that on here?!"

    They broke up about 2 days later :rolleyes:
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    'y dus every1 have to smoke aha i mite start lol x'

    It has two likes and a comment reading 'Do it lol x'

    I wish I was joking. :facepalm2:
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    ""

    "what's up babe?"
    "you okay? xxx"
    "what's wrong? "

    "i dont wanna talk about it"

    Why put it as your status then? D:
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    Urrghhh there's countless things I could say about Facebook
    I agree with, I think it was someone on this thread or another I can't remember (short memory span ), that person who said Facebook is sprayed with rampant teenage hormones.
    Or something. :P

    The pointless statuses, the stupidly similar photos every girl seems to put up caked in makeup and pouting, the incredibly cheesy groups that everyone joins and spams the homepage and little year 7-9 boys and girls who think they're in love.
    JHEEEZZZUS
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    I initially began scrolling the length and breadth of my news feed, but then remembered the perfect people. One is an absolute idiot random adder, but I keep him because sometimes he quotes Mean Girls :o: (A) and the other one is a cross-dressing drug addict from Sweden studying fashion (B)

    A
    I think my toes look wierd>.< lol
    Eww.. The ***** would be getting fingered while I'm on the back stea next to her. Lol
    Every one should come to my house and watch porn..... Lmfao jk=P
    I know its to early but i want some hot lays.

    B
    vomit is my passsion . (5 likes, and the first comment says 'being bulimic is glamourous')
    filthy towel (posting a picture of himself in a bathroom and there's a towel hanging in the background)
    met janice dickinson , well i would have showed u what a lovley botox connection we got but since i just got robbed @ brick lane that will not happen !!!!!!!!! I HATE THIS ****ING FILTHY CITY TAKE ME HOME NOW!"

    Oh and also this man who runs a record company apparently, he directs music videos and runs a film night in Brighton:
    Has discovered he has an extra £450,000 hidden away & not used it yet.
    I have a zero tolerance policy in regards to lateness, so if you choose to be late to one of my events or just cruise in whenever you feel like it, you must expect me to pick you up on it & expect better standards from you in the future.
    This is the second time I have had to bring this subject up with you which is unacceptable on EVERY level, I shall be seeking legal action this week & you WILL be brought to justice.
    Facebook friends,.......I'm not quite through
    with you yet.
    Let me explain something to all of you: one of the few perks
    of my office is that...I am empowered to handle
    certain matters on my own as I see fit....Do you understand ?
    My time is valuable & I don't want you to waste it, I have a very busy schedule & if you wish to be involved in it then you will be reliable or I shall have to enforce strict disciplinary action.

    He's just a walking advert for why you should never have colleagues on facebook (not that that's how I know him thank god)
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    "Just had a nice dump"..clearly the person thought everyone needed to know he just went for a ****.
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    I don't care about boring statuses, but it someone post an emo status, that's it, BOOM, deleted.

    "Why am I tied to the eternal shackles of devotion."

    "Why do I bother, no one would miss me."

    ^^two delete worthy examples
 
 
 
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