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Boyfriend is breaking my heart Watch

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    If you actually caused the arguments, im afraid to say you killed the r'ship
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    Read your story. from a guy's perspective he obviously takes you for granted. I think everyone is guilty of that sometimes. If he knew how close he was to actually losing you then he might buck his ideas up! Read him the riot act! Don't dump him straight away as there is some reason why you are staying with him.
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    OP I talk from a friends experience here. She did a lot for him and he took it for granted. If I were you I wouldn't make any effort to get hold of him or make arrangements. Only then will you be able to confirm to yourself he doesn't care. My friend left it 28 days and he didn't bother to contact her and she broke it off and he looked like an idiot.
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    Definitely agree with the above! if you just totally ignore him and really resist the urge to send him texts etc and see how long it takes him to bother texting or calling you then you'll see how bothered he is with your relationship and hopefully it'll give you the strength to break up with him or it'll make him realise he needs to make effort but it really sounds like he doesnt care. But make sure you really leave it - even more than a week or two if you can hold out.

    If my boyfriend said 'we're likely to split up when i start working....' well id have broken up with him then and there. I was with a guy for 6.5 years - loved him so much and he begged for us not to break up and i always gave in and he never changed, so i changed instead. Life is particularly sweet now :banana:
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    well unfortunately i've been in the same position as your boyfriend and when I lost the interest/excitement that was there initially, I couldn't be bothered to do things like travelling, even a 15 minute walk, so sorry but if i had a say i think he's lost the initial interest
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    you should go your separate ways :/ it sounds like he's made it really obvious his hearts not in it
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    is your boyfriend's hobby sup air? because if it is, i think you should maybe get him to introduce it to you, so you can still spend time together, and maybe things will work out
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Me and my boyfriend have been together for 7 months. At first everything was great, he was sweet and made me feel safe. For the first time I felt like someone was actually crazy about me.

    But now things have gone sour He lives a 2 hour train/bus ride away, and it is always me that does this. It costs money yes, but I don't mind doing that. What bothers me, is that he doesn't appreciate the time and effort I take to see him. We talked about it the other day and he said, "to be honest, I couldn't do that travelling that you do. " Basically saying, that the effort I make is the only thing that's carrying on the relationship....I feel totally lost. He doesn't make the effort for me that I make for him. I feel like I'm not special enough or something.

    Next, it has become apparent that he's a child. He wastes all his money on a particular hobby he does, leaving no cash for me and him to go out together. He also spends all his time doing this hobby, and when we both start working more, this will make it harder to see each other. This makes it more worrying for me, because I would have to make the effort seeing as he doesn't even do it now....I don't think I can do it on my own

    He even said that when he starts working we might break up, but we should "just enjoy the right now."

    I don't get sweet texts anymore. When he does talk to me he says nothing sweet or anything. He talks to me as if I'm just anyone.

    But the worst part is, I feel like it's my fault. I've had a lot of arguments with him about him not making effort for me, and he thinks me arguing with him is treating him bad.

    UGH advice please people.
    So you're the same person that made the other thread but from his point of view
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    (Original post by JamfulDodger)
    is your boyfriend's hobby sup air? because if it is, i think you should maybe get him to introduce it to you, so you can still spend time together, and maybe things will work out
    If only I had not used my rep up
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    (Original post by thru sun and rain)
    If only I had not used my rep up
    cheers for considering it though
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    I've heard this thread before just to say but I'll try and give you the same advice that I gave you last time. It seems apparent that you still love/care for him deeply because you're still sicking with him even though he's not treating you very nicely and like a gf.

    I know you've been together for 7 months but if it were me and I couldn't see a way for him to change then I wouldn't stay with him. LDR's are always more difficult in a way than non LDR's because of all the effort put into travelling but it seems to me that he's not putting his heart and soul into your relationship and tbh, there isn't much you can do to change him.

    All you can do is express your feelings and worries to him. Tell him that you don't think the relationship is working, you're not happy, and you're not prepared to stay with him unless he's willing to seriously change and put more effort into seeing you and treating you much better. If he doesn't seem to understand or he doesn't take at least some responsibility then you shouldn't waste your time on a guy who isn't respecting you. Don't keep wasting your life on him if things don't seriously improve. You're not in a truly happy relationship and you deserve someone who really does care for you and who actually wants to spend time with you.

    YOU DESERVE BETTER!!!! .
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    drop it like is hot... I just taking a guess... he had enough sex with you already... thats why girls don't learn. Don't have sex that quick. guys will lose interest fast.
    I am not ruining anything for guys anyways, because girls will be girls... they will keep doing what they are doing.

    you love him, he probably doesnt. He is probably young which he is not even thinking for the future... i married young at 21 and I am happy but still I am 23... been with her for 4 years now, known her for 5.. IT just depends who your are getting in love with.

    girls, if he is nice to you for a month, but you havent had sex yet. Maybe that is why... Now if you been with that person and he is been nice a year after intimacy.. maybe you got something..
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Me and my boyfriend have been together for 7 months. At first everything was great, he was sweet and made me feel safe. For the first time I felt like someone was actually crazy about me.

    But now things have gone sour He lives a 2 hour train/bus ride away, and it is always me that does this. It costs money yes, but I don't mind doing that. What bothers me, is that he doesn't appreciate the time and effort I take to see him. We talked about it the other day and he said, "to be honest, I couldn't do that travelling that you do. " Basically saying, that the effort I make is the only thing that's carrying on the relationship....I feel totally lost. He doesn't make the effort for me that I make for him. I feel like I'm not special enough or something.

    Next, it has become apparent that he's a child. He wastes all his money on a particular hobby he does, leaving no cash for me and him to go out together. He also spends all his time doing this hobby, and when we both start working more, this will make it harder to see each other. This makes it more worrying for me, because I would have to make the effort seeing as he doesn't even do it now....I don't think I can do it on my own

    He even said that when he starts working we might break up, but we should "just enjoy the right now."

    I don't get sweet texts anymore. When he does talk to me he says nothing sweet or anything. He talks to me as if I'm just anyone.

    But the worst part is, I feel like it's my fault. I've had a lot of arguments with him about him not making effort for me, and he thinks me arguing with him is treating him bad.

    UGH advice please people.
    Girl I have had an absolute rollercoaster with my boyfriend, of which I don't need to go into the specifics. I do agree that you need to enjoy life as it comes and try not to worry about the future although I'm aware that it's easier said than done. My boyfriend and I won't see each other over easter and summer and when and if we do will be seldom done. He's also going to the USA for a year as part of his degree - nightmare.

    What works for me when similar problems such as yours arise is to test him and push our relationship to the verge of a break up - although ridiculous advice I'm a notorious drama queen in relationships and don't hesitate in doing so as he will always fight for me - reassurance that I should probably take more note of in future.

    Ridiculous advice I know but I like the risk and passion involved and enjoy a rollercoaster journey.
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    just act the same way he acts , pay less attentio to him , dont argue or anything just pay less attention and be happy with your other life, do things that makes you feel good, hang out with friend go somewhere like on a trip with your friedns tell him you're going to a trip but dont text him while you're there so he will be curious what are you doing and how much fun you're having without him , just continue like this until he asks what is wrong with you ,and if he says nothing then its time to dump him .
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    this sounds just like another thread i read a few days ago, but from the bf point pf view. is his hobby sup air ?!
 
 
 
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