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My BF is uptight in bed and disgusted by my lady juices watch

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    (Original post by Bhumbauze)
    He's less experienced than you, you make it obvious that he's less experienced than you, he probably knows that he's also less experienced than other guys you've been with, and he's intimidated to the point that it turns him off completely.

    I have solved your life . Next.
    Thank you.


    There is likely to be some truth in what you said. Can you solve this question for me:

    How do I fix it?
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    (Original post by Walter Ego)
    OP, I think I love you.
    Walter Ego, I think I like you as a friend
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    Shame you're not a ******, op. - I think he would have loved that.
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    Make him a sandwich and go from there.
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    Maybe he is just overwelhemed by you ,(excuse my spelling) or he is not use to being in such a sexual relationship.
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    Tell us more about your lady juices.
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    What does he do for work? He's probably tired out from the daily grind. :dontknow:
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    (Original post by synvilla)
    I think it sounds like he's gay but prefers being in a heterosexual relation, tbh.
    That or he's just cheating on you.
    • #7
    #7

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My bf loves my lady juices!

    He can't get enough
    So does mine! He thinks my VJ is the most amazing thing in the world. And not even just sexually (though there is that) - he finds it fascinating, complicated, amazing.

    I have probably a low-medium sex drive but I would NEVER be so rude to my boyfriend if he wanted more sex than I did. And saying no but then turning porn on, wtf??? He sounds rubbish.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So does mine! He thinks my VJ is the most amazing thing in the world. And not even just sexually (though there is that) - he finds it fascinating, complicated, amazing.

    I have probably a low-medium sex drive but I would NEVER be so rude to my boyfriend if he wanted more sex than I did. And saying no but then turning porn on, wtf??? He sounds rubbish.
    HAHA you're probably his first lay and he's getting it all while he can!
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    This won't help you, but I repped you for the hilarious writing style you have.
    • #7
    #7

    (Original post by chrislpp)
    HAHA you're probably his first lay and he's getting it all while he can!
    Well yes, I was his first. But we've been together four and a half years, you'd think it would have worn off by now. It's probably a bit strange, but I don't mind. He can fiddle around down there as much as he likes.
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    ROFL, who are these idiots saying they think he might be gay? If he was gay he wouldn't even be attracted enough to even get it up or 'finish' so quickly in you. Ridiculous and absurd statements from misinformed women that know little about men.
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    (Original post by Jellybean91)
    He sounds horrible, selfish, blunt, and very likely gay. Yeh he may be nice the rest of the time, but could you carry on doing this for the rest of your life?

    I know this isn't what you want to hear, but you need to move on and find someone who deserves you and would do anything to be with you!
    Ridiculous statement and a load of rubbish.
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    He is gay.

    /thread
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    (Original post by the cake lady)
    In my other posts, I have explained that I don't think he is gay, and my reasoning. I had to consider it because I had to be open to any possibility. Only by considering all possibilities could I then take appropriate action.

    If he had a low sex drive, he wouldn't be looking at porn and giving himself a treat, or get a hard-on several times a day. Or talk about sexy women and what he'd do to them.

    If I didn't respond to pretty much anything my boyfriend did to initiate sex or turn me on, and I was disgusted by his penis and his ***, and made excuses not to have sex with him but fingered myself anyway, then I think people would suggest I might be a lesbian.

    I don't think my boyfriend is a douche. He's a pretty cool guy actually. Apart from in the sexy department.
    If you had, then I'm sorry I didn't read them, it's just I was on my phone posting at the time.

    Whilst that may be true, he may just not be really into you in the sexual department? That could be one of the possibilities, but like you say, yes he could be gay.

    Not really. There are a lot of girls that turn down guys for sex, even if they're in a relationship. Quite a few are disgusted by the idea of a blowjob, and about the ***. Others say that they don't get pleasure from intercourse, and may just want to pleasure themselves. Yes, there may be some that suggest you are a lesbian, but it would be far less inclined than if a guy turned down a girl.

    I know, that was addressed to other posters, most of whom girls, that immediately called the guy a douche, and that you 'deserve better' which is quite quick a card to play without looking at the OP properly.
    • PS Helper
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    PS Helper
    (Original post by Buxtons)
    Ridiculous statement and a load of rubbish.
    In what way? He's rejecting all her advances and making her feel like crap! No one should have to feel like that!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you to everyone who has replied to this thread. I know this is just a forum but it really means a lot to me that people have taken their time to make an input. Thank you.

    To those of you who have said that he is gay, I really don't think he is. I did happen to come across his porn history once and the words 'babysitter' 'schoolgirl' 'big boobies' and 'anal' came up quite a lot. So after that I did the naughty schoolgirl/innocent thing, and he said it was really hot and he got hard, but we still didn't have sex. I waited until like 1am that night for him to make a move, and then I went and got stupidly drunk.

    I said to him that I know he can fulfil his fantasies through porn, but that we could recreate them in real life if he wanted, thus negated the need for porn when I am there. And it turned into an argument because he though I meant I didn't like/want him watching porn. And yeah we have anal sex, he likes that. (Breakthrough!!!)

    I have also suggested my little finger in his bum, to see if he might like anal himself and he wasn't having any of it and was adamant he wouldn't like it. I got really annoyed one time and asked him if he was gay and he was really hurt. I felt pretty guilty about it to be honest and said that it just came out of my mouth in the heat of the moment and that I didn't actually think he was gay.

    How would I know for sure if he is gay or not?

    I can't dump him over our sex life. That would make me quite shallow. In all other respects, he is a good boyfriend. So breaking up with him over sex would be quite unreasonable and would suggest I was only with him for one thing and that I didn't really care about him as a person. If it gets to the point that I start looking in other places for satisfaction, then I'd have to question whether the relationship is fulfilling enough. But for now, I think I have to try and work it out. Whilst pleasuring myself mostly. (which he tells me I do too much).

    I think what has resonated quite a lot with me is the suggestion that he is just intimidated and that I am too full on. I've tried backing off and he wasn't bothered at all. And I was more frustrated at the end of it than at the start. I've tried letting him have all the control so he doesn't feel intimidated, and that is what we have been doing until now. We have sex on his terms, as and when he wants it. It wouldn't be reasonable for me to not put out now though, seeing as we are long distance and we see each other once a month on average.

    I suppose I could try talking to him again... (for like the gazillionth time) *sigh*
    But how do I do it? What can I say that isn't going to emasculate him and dampen his confidence even more?
    That's pretty gay IMO.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I have a pretty high sex drive. I'm also pretty uninhibited; I love experimenting and talking openly about sex. Whatever my boyfriend wanted to do, I'd be all for it. (This excludes anything related to faeces, urine and vomit.) It's easy for me to orgasm, I'm ridiculously flexible, I squirt, I'm filthy in bed (not unhygienic!), I'm relatively experienced. I'm not trying to blow my own trumpet, I'm genuinely baffled as to what is going on. What am I doing wrong?!

    He doesn't want to do anything exciting in bed. He actually doesn't even want to have regular sex that much. In the second month of our relationship, despite seeing each other every day, we had sex 3 times. And they were brief. And I didn't orgasm. When I try to initiate sex, he pushes me away so often it's beginning to affect my self-esteem. It's not like we're really old (both 23) or really inexperienced. And apart from our sex life, the relationship is pretty good. He's an awesome guy and we get on like a house on fire and there is definitely chemistry.
    We've been together about 6 - 7 months of which the last 3 have been long-distance.

    I'm posting this now because I'm seeing him on Thursday after a month, and would really like some ideas and thoughts.

    I've tried doing different things in an attempt to seduce him. I've put on my sexiest underwear, suspenders and all, and lap-danced for him, (he was too tired) I've suggested doing it in different places, (none would be as comfy as a bed) I've asked him what his fantasies are (he's not sure) I've asked him what turns him on (it depends) I've suggested watching porn together, to help me gauge what he's into, (we will one day) I've dressed up in different random outfits (they looked hot but he just didn't feel like it those days), I've suggested soft bondage, I've tried talking dirty, I've sent him naughty pictures, I've suggested a threesome, I've tried doing it at different times of the day, I've suggested and/or tried a million different things that I can't even remember now.

    I've tried talking to him (several times now) about our sex life, with minimal response. He denied that he has any less of a sex drive than I do (which is slightly true because on occasion, he's said no to having sex with me but has put on porn less than 10 minutes after). He said that he does want to have sex a lot, and when I asked why, then, do we not, he said it was various reasons, including he couldn't be bothered sometimes. And suggested that I just try harder to get him turned on. That comment made me cry.

    He's beginning to realise that I am not satisfied. So he is making some attempt at improving things. However, when we do have sex, he makes it seem like it's a chore and he's only doing it because he doesn't want me to be unsatisfied, rather than because he just really wants to. The sex itself is of okay quality. He's rather well-endowed, but seems to think that just thrusting away is going to do the trick. It took me 2 months of gentle coaxing to get him to finger me. Foreplay has increased from non-existent to a couple of minutes maybe, and that's only just to check if I'm wet enough. Sometimes he likes to clean up mid-sex 'to make himself more comfortable'. If I'm really wet or have just squirted, he'll tell me I'm creaming up and pass me a tissue whilst looking at my bits in poorly disguised disgust. He has told me he doesn't like the smell/taste of lady juices. So he has been down on me once, to see if he still felt the same, was down there less than 5 seconds, resurfaced and looked like he was going to puke.

    I've really seriously considered that he might be gay and in denial. But he has had girlfriends before me, buys Nuts and other lads magazines, and is quite vocal and explicit about what he'd do to Scarlett Johansen. Does anyone reckon it might all just be a front?

    When we're together, he'd rather snuggle than have sex. When we're apart, I try to keep the magic alive by sending him naughty pictures, talking dirty to him down the phone, sending him explicit text messages. And the most I've got out of him in response is 'That's cool', 'Nice!' or 'Yeah sounds good we should do that when we see each other next.'

    I am really at a loss as to what to do next. Both quantity and quality are lacking. It used to just make me really frustrated, but now I am just really sad because I have a feeling that this is just what our sex life is doomed to be like. But I also really don't want to give up hope. And I'm not about to break up with him over it. Even if I tried to tone down my sex drive (which I'm trying to do currently, with minimal success), the sex would still be of average quality. Although I'm looking forward to seeing him on Thursday, part of me is also dreading it because when we are face to face, it is harder to control my desire to jump on him.

    Any ideas/thoughts/support/comments would be greatly appreciated. I just don't want to give up :'(
    Every time I read this thread title, I can't help to think to myself, "I'd love your lady juices"
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    (Original post by anonymous)
    i squirt
    squirtle!
 
 
 
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