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Not wanting to loose virginity - girls watch

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    So ive been with my girlfriend for almost 8 months and when sex has been discussed (im 17 she's just turned 17) she says we will however not yet and that she just doesn't want to right now.

    When she tried to explain what she thought she said that in year 12/13 most people had had sex and therefore she felt sort of proud of still having her virginity and being able to call herself one. So it seems to me that the only reason she doesn't want to is because she wants to keep this title of virgin and not be the same as another girl who's had sex.

    She also said that once it's gone you can't get it back, but to me, after having sex with her, I certainly wouldn't, under any circumstances, want it back! So why would she?

    I guess I'm just trying, really trying, to understand why she doesn't want to (as we have done everything but) so I can understand where she's coming from for my own piece of mind. I hope that what I've said hasn't come across as *****y because "she won't have sex" because I'm not in anyway after sex and will only want to have sex with her if she wants, wants, to have sex with me.

    Just trying to get in her shoes so I can understand her that little bit better.

    Thanks and sorry for the length of the post!

    thankz
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    This is the best advice you will receive this year:

    Just don't say **** about sex, and avoid appearing interested.


    Works like a ****ing charm.
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    Well that's not sexy. I genuinely don't understand how people have relationships and don't have sex after 8 months 0.o

    I mean, when I'm alone with a girl, things just tend to uhh, happen, you don't think "are we ready" blah blah blah because that's just boring.

    What I'm trying to say is, get her into bed sex tends not to happen after having a chat about sex, well, in my limited experience anyway.
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    Can't say I ever felt like that, but then I don't think that many of my friends have lost their virginity, so it wasn't about jumping on the band wagon for me.
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    (Original post by Yawn11)
    This is the best advice you will receive this year:

    Just don't say **** about sex, and avoid appearing interested.


    Works like a ****ing charm.
    I will also try this...Its been frigging 2 months with me and talking about it has not helped.
    I don't even get it shes not a virgin but she made the last guy wait a year and a half( trust issues jheeze )
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    To be quite honest, she sounds immature. It's great that she's not rushing into things because of peer pressure or anything, but being a virgin doesn't make you better in any way than other people your age who have had sex.
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    (Original post by imperial maniac)
    Well that's not sexy. I genuinely don't understand how people have relationships and don't have sex after 8 months 0.o

    I mean, when I'm alone with a girl, things just tend to uhh, happen, you don't think "are we ready" blah blah blah because that's just boring.

    What I'm trying to say is, get her into bed sex tends not to happen after having a chat about sex, well, in my limited experience anyway.
    LOL. You F.A.I.L.
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    Girls don't like being presurised into having sex. Being a virgin is important to us (well, the decent ones who are not ****s/whores).

    You only have sex for the first time once. It has to be special.
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    Virgins seem to think they are better than people who have had sex. It's so annoying. Tell her to get over herself and open her legs.
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    (Original post by MairiTheMack)
    LOL. You F.A.I.L.
    ??
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    (Original post by MairiTheMack)
    Girls don't like being presurised into having sex. Being a virgin is important to us (well, the decent ones who are not ****s/whores).

    You only have sex for the first time once. It has to be special.
    What's so special about it?

    It's a bloke sticking his willy in you for a bit, having a wiggle, then leaving.
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    I never felt this way so I can't really understand the attitude.
    She won't be any inherently different when she can no longer say "I'm a virgin". I mean she has already engaged in sexual activity, so I fail to see what difference it makes to her that intercourse isn't one of the sexual activities...
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    Maybe she's affraid that getting the penis up her vagina will hurt..... :O!
    • #1
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    (Original post by imperial maniac)
    Well that's not sexy. I genuinely don't understand how people have relationships and don't have sex after 8 months 0.o

    I mean, when I'm alone with a girl, things just tend to uhh, happen, you don't think "are we ready" blah blah blah because that's just boring.

    What I'm trying to say is, get her into bed sex tends not to happen after having a chat about sex, well, in my limited experience anyway.
    I agree with the not talking about rediness for sex or anything, the talk about sex and the actual sexual occurances are completely separate so i completely agree with the not talking bluntly about it. usually when conversations about sex happen after sexual activities.

    (Original post by dotty_but_good)
    Can't say I ever felt like that, but then I don't think that many of my friends have lost their virginity, so it wasn't about jumping on the band wagon for me.
    Nor have ours however with the invention of facebook and myspace, you're never 5 clicks from someone who has, therefore it can seem like everyone around you has.

    (Original post by Philbert)
    To be quite honest, she sounds immature. It's great that she's not rushing into things because of peer pressure or anything, but being a virgin doesn't make you better in any way than other people your age who have had sex.
    Thats why i found it odd that she said she felt proud of being able to still say she was a virgin and it sounded to me like that was one of the main reasons she didnt want to.

    (Original post by MairiTheMack)
    Girls don't like being presurised into having sex. Being a virgin is important to us (well, the decent ones who are not ****s/whores).

    You only have sex for the first time once. It [SIZE="7"]has[/SIZE] to be special.
    I understand that specialness is certainly 60-75% most important when we do but imo having sex with her is what makes it special. also, as i explained just becuase this is a girl+sex thread does not mean i am in any way trying to pressurise her into anything, thats why ive asked for peoples opinions on here rather than asking her and appearing pressurising.

    (Original post by INeedToLoseWeight)
    Virgins seem to think they are better than people who have had sex. It's so annoying. Tell her to get over herself and open her legs.
    I agree with the first part to a point but the second seems a little misguided. Especially since that phrase, i would assume, illicts closing, rather than opening, of the legs.

    (Original post by Blueflare)
    I never felt this way so I can't really understand the attitude.
    She won't be any inherently different when she can no longer say "I'm a virgin". I mean she has already engaged in sexual activity, so I fail to see what difference it makes to her that intercourse isn't one of the sexual activities...
    I completely agree. Thats what I dont understand. As to me, it's all completely synonymous.
 
 
 
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