self esteem + relationship :(

Just a bit of advice needed..

I'm 19 I have such a lovely boyfriend, been together about 4 months, he does everything for me and supports me in every way. He hasn't done anything wrong at all but I feel somethings wrong and want to end it all the time although I don't genuinely want to be without him :s-smilie:

I was thinking it might be my self esteem, I feel he could do a lot better and be happier with someone else. I've been cheated on before in a 2 year relationship so i suppose trust was quite an issue with getting into another relationship.

I trust him though so it cant be that. I really want to get back on track because i know it is just me, not him.

Can self esteem destroy relationships?
Or could it be I'm not ready for a relationship?

:frown:

Reply 1

j.laurence

If you feel you should end it then do because I doubt you're going to feel much happier continuing like this. Also have you tried talking to him 'bout this & your self esteem?

Reply 2

luci-x

Original post by j.laurence

If you feel you should end it then do because I doubt you're going to feel much happier continuing like this. Also have you tried talking to him 'bout this & your self esteem?

Thanks for reply
I have tried to end it but he just says I'm being stupid and it can work. He says he doesn't understamd why we have to end and demands a reason before he lets me give up on us..

Reply 3

emeritus2011

Original post by luci-x

You will end up pushing the poor guy away, by making him actually believe he is too good for you, why cant you just enjoy the relationship for what it is? and yes you will destroy your relationship.
If you are goingto leave him then i suggest you remain single for a while and appreciate your own company before messing with some next guy's head.

Reply 4

imonlysleeping

Have you explained how you feel? My ex-girlfriend was in a very similar position to you so I can probably see it from a similar point of view as your boyfriend. I imagine that he will want to support you and make things work, as that's exactly how I felt.

Just make sure that you don't just ignore the problem at any point. Look in to ways of getting your confidence back, we tried some pretty good self-help books. Also, think about things/people who make you feel good about yourself.

I don't know you or him, but I am 100% sure that he could not be happier with anyone else. If he wanted to be then why would he still be with you?

Reply 5

Gemma16

awww i have a twin, we are so alike, i've been with my boyfriend 4months, cheated on in 3 yr relationship and i have self esteem issues and worry a lot about the relationship even though he couldn't treat me any better, its just me, i really hate being me, so fking neg. i have got a lot more pos since being with him but i do have my odd moment :/ and feel really bad and guility for being a b1itch

Reply 6

idontthinkso

It's not your duty to worry about those things.

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 7

Roo Bix

Maybe it's anxiety over the fact that the relationship is so good that 'something' has to go wrong eventually.

Don't stress! Spend more time being a part of the relationship than not being a part of it by worrying too much!