Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
x Turn on thread page Beta

Generalised anxiety disorder watch

Announcements
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by houseelf)
    That makes sense. I guess there's always been that nagging little feeling at the back of my mind that says, "the official guidelines say no discrimination, but in practice that can't always be the case, right?". But it honestly sounds like it's not like that. Result!

    I totally understand where she's coming from. Without bipolarity I probably wouldn't have the faintest interest in psychiatry/neurology.
    (although I suppose it's easy to say that the illness has done me good when I'm in the middle of a stable period, eh? )
    My flatmate's bipolar. She's not interested one bit in psychiatry (though, I am) but is interested in neuro, and very good at it I believe. Especially the pharmacology parts of neuro.

    Interestingly, the dean of the med school told me people have before been hospitalised over bipolar disorder, and still completed the course.

    I think it's very hard for someone who hasn't suffered from a psychiatric disorder to really understand people with them. It's easy enough to list the symptoms, but when you get it it can be compleltely debilitating and you don't even know you've got it often until someone tells you. I think an important role of a doctor is to check the social history of a patient. They may come in with another complaint (feeling tired/a bit ill) and the underlying issue might be psychiatric. I realised how much depression didn't make sense to me before I had it, it's hard to see how much control over yourself and your life you lose, and some people still probably believe it's a fault of the person who has the disorder (they need to get up earlier/they need to cheer up/they have nothing to be depressed about so they need to get perspective). That, and I realised in debates about euthanasia/suicide, people tend to focus on physical illnesses, and say it's entirely in someone's right to take their life if they have a debilitating physiological disease, yet a lot of people frown upon people doing it for mental health issues.

    I do think people try to be sympathetic but without realising, often miss the point. So yeah, we'll make awesome doctors.
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jessaay!)
    Hey guys, this is especially directed to those who said they were struggling with this themselves, please, please PLEASE go to the doctor. I went, after some encouragement by the dean of the medical school, and they gave me medication. I'm on 20mg/day of citalopram, and whilst the effects of the citalopram itself are a bit horrific (at first it makes the symptoms worse, and often there are horrific physical side effects such as wanting to vomit/being really tired/feeling tired all the time) but eventually it starts working properly and whilst it's not a cure but just there to reduce the symptoms, it's entirely worth it. I feel a bit like a zombie sometimes, but that's much better than I felt when I had the symptoms.

    The doctor diagnosed both depression and anxiety. They tend to go hand in hand.

    It might take a while to realise the treatment is actually helping, but when I read this thread, I realise how much it has progressed. I'm going for cognitive behavioural therapy after the summer, as I have exams and then I'm going to africa. Hopefully the CBT will cure the deep-down psychological issues I have, but I'm also trying new things and meeting new people, including travelling with people I've never met before this weekend (with a charity), and it's helping me solve issues myself. I've confronted head on what was wrong, and I've started to be more honest with myself and with my friends about what I'm feeling and it's made me realise that I wasn't acting normally for a while.

    When I read this post back, I realise how much I've progressed. Whilst I do still struggle to get up some mornings, I'm much better than I was. I've been to more lectures. Not all the anxious/depressive feelings have gone, but they're much reduced. I'm not constantly on edge anymore, I'm getting up earlier and I'm getting back to the old happy, fun, outgoing Jess. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I used to get up at 1pm/2pm. Now I class 11am as late, and I'm getting up progressively earlier. I made it into a 9am lecture a while ago, today I voluntarily got up at 10:30am despite having no commitments to get up for, and I'm generally feeling better in myself. I've felt genuinely happy again, this weekend, when I spent some time with some old friends and met some new friends in a training weekend for when I go to south africa. If I'd have done this a while ago, I would have been terrified to meet these people and I'd think they all hated me. I took it all at face value and everyone really got on with me, and I got on with everyone there.

    I started to have such severe depressive feelings that I became completely insular and didn't tell anyone about my feelings, I just thought they were to do with me. I'd blame myself for being a boring/miserable *****, or for not being as outgoing as everyone else, and I'd hate myself for it. I blamed me not getting up and not being as interested in things I used to be on me being lazy. I genuinely believed all the anxious feelings I had, I thought people were working against me and I was doomed. I started to hate my medical school (when it has been the best thing that has happened to me and I love it), and wished I was somewhere else. I couldn't see the good things in my life. I'm also embarrassed to say this now, but I started to get suicidal thoughts. Which gave the doctors a huge warning sign.

    I think this is something I have been suffering with all this academic year. It started off mildly, and then progressed until it became debilitating. I told my medical school about it, and they've moved my exams back so I have time to get back on my feet and do some more revision to compensate for the apathy about my education I've felt all year and also through fears I might have had a mental break down if I sat them too early.

    People I knew wouldn't have known it. They maybe thought when I was upset, I was having a bad day. When I was scared/angry/suspicious of people, I was just being moody. When I missed lectures, I was being lazy. Nobody noticed the change in me, and the few people I have told about the diagnosis have been completely shocked, and thought I was just such a happy/outgoing girl because I put on a facade of happiness most of the time because I thought that's how people wanted me to act.

    I've de-annoned myself so people can read this and maybe PM me if they want to. Please, please PLEASE go to the doctor and talk about it. They don't judge, my doctor was lovely and we had a chat. They see it all the time. At least 50% of the population have a depressive episode at some point in their life. Don't let it ruin your life. It's not your fault. So yeah, PM me if any of you need a chat.
    I really wish I read a post like this 5 years ago - it took me 3 years to finally get the courage to go to a doctor and eventually explain my feelings to someone else. I was in the mindset that I could either fight this alone or that it would eventually just go away by itself.

    Also another thing to note; it really is best to keep yourself active, I've had two gap-years from academia now because I thought it would help if I kept the pressure off myself, but I end up doing nothing in the daytime anymore, which really does make you feel even worse and it becomes really difficult to get back into a routine again.

    I've still not gone to a CBT session yet, even though my doctor keeps on telling me to go, I keep putting it off (I've always thought it would be really demeaning for some reason) and trying to just rely on my medication (I started on Citalopram then Sertraline and now I'm on Venlefaxine) but it's beginning to dawn on me that you really do need to combine the two.

    Anyway, thanks for the post, really has made me feel better today.

    And @ OP, try to help yourself sooner rather than later, don't waste as much time as I have.
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Srxjer)
    I really wish I read a post like this 5 years ago - it took me 3 years to finally get the courage to go to a doctor and eventually explain my feelings to someone else. I was in the mindset that I could either fight this alone or that it would eventually just go away by itself.

    Also another thing to note; it really is best to keep yourself active, I've had two gap-years from academia now because I thought it would help if I kept the pressure off myself, but I end up doing nothing in the daytime anymore, which really does make you feel even worse and it becomes really difficult to get back into a routine again.

    I've still not gone to a CBT session yet, even though my doctor keeps on telling me to go, I keep putting it off (I've always thought it would be really demeaning for some reason) and trying to just rely on my medication (I started on Citalopram then Sertraline and now I'm on Venlefaxine) but it's beginning to dawn on me that you really do need to combine the two.

    Anyway, thanks for the post, really has made me feel better today.

    And @ OP, try to help yourself sooner rather than later, don't waste as much time as I have.

    I know it's difficult, but try to go to your CBT. A lot of people want to quit after the first few sessions, but eventually find it helps them a lot. It shouldn't be demeaning at all. They're not telling you that everyone should think in the same way and that you're not normal, they're just trying to target the areas of your personality that they believe are causing you to feel the way you feel, and identify what you can change to make yourself feel better.

    All the best, though. And I say this, as though I know a lot about it, when actually I feel exactly the same as you do.
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    Also, sorry if I wasn't clear, but I am the OP
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    I'm on 20mg Citalopram as well, had a major bad patch where I was sleeping erratically and stopped eating. I've seen a counselor for two sessions but I honestly don't find it helpful (so far at least). It just feels like I'm being made to lecture him the whole time, and when he does say anything it's vacuous. Some of the psychological conclusions were completely fanciful and I had an awkward time dispelling them without being blunt. I hope it gets better...
    • PS Reviewer
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    PS Reviewer
    (Original post by Jessaay!)
    Also, sorry if I wasn't clear, but I am the OP
    Well done for speaking out and getting the help you need and deserve. It's nice of you to come back and update everyone. Hopefully it will encourage a few people to approach their GPs about their own problems
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    I have something similar, I also feel as though no one actually wants to talk to me and I take everything personally but mine is a social phobia, it basically means that I have a fear of being judged negatively in social situations.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: May 12, 2011
Poll
Do you like carrot cake?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.