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I have no sympathy for people with eating disorders watch

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    (Original post by Brutal Honesty)
    They're mentally weak, big difference. If it were a mental illness why does it appear more often in superficial societies, such as the UK or US or in young, middle class women? Women in China aren't starving themselves to look like a coat hanger model. It's a form of attention seeking and vanity gone to extremes.
    You're not wrong to say eating disorders are (to an extent) a product of our society, its vanity, its expectations etc. But it goes against your point.

    If eating disorders were some kind of personal flaw, deserving of no sympathy, wouldn't they be evenly distributed amongst populations? Wouldn't there be as many Japanese "narcissists" as Europeans?

    You're contradicting yourself, unless you're trying to argue some kind of innate ethnic superiority.

    Obviously something about western society makes girls feel an act in a worrying way when it comes to their diet and weight. (It's not difficult to a guess what, unless say, you're an idiot) That isn't a reason to "blame" them personally. An eating disorder isn't something you choose to have, it's something that creeps its way into your head and takes over your life. It's a mental illness, to not be sympathetic is to be ignorant. It reflects badly on you and noone else.
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    (Original post by chinaberry)
    There are TONS of people under hardship. I think they deserve understanding, like I said, which isn't something to be given lightly, you know. Sympathy is something different- it meddles with empathy too- and I think people are too quick to say they feel sympathetic towards something. I don't automatically feel sympathy towards all people who are "mentally ill". Each case should be taken individually. If I may use myself as an example again- I don't want any sympathy for my "mental illness", for the label. I will accept sympathy for the suffering it causes me (let's go for the dramatics). But AS is not entirely characterised by suffering, right? Of course I will feel something for people who are very unhappy. But I'm not talking solely about anorexia, but about this thing of "mental illness" (quoting from other people mean btw, not belitting it) which has become an umbrella term. Some people enjoy this "illness" or it profits them or whatever.
    I also have AS (small world :awesome:) and I wouldn't equate it to an eating disorder at all in terms of 'suffering'; I see it as a different personality state, and one which mostly brings me an awful lot of advantages. I don't see it as a disadvantage or problem at all, and I find 'sympathy' for it irritating, a waste of time, unproductive and patronising. I suspect you're on the same page with that. I also wouldn't class it as a mental illness.

    I think we agree mostly, actually. I'm mainly saying that people who do suffer and are miserable deserve sympathy, which seems to be pretty much what you're saying tbh
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    (Original post by alharrison4)
    If eating disorders are a product of environment, how come you're attempting to blame the individual? I don't see much logic there.
    Simple. Our society is more superficial than say, in China so it tends to have a bigger effect on superficial people, i.e. those who buy into it and the concept of the 'ideal body image' that they get from the media. The vast majority of women don't get eating disorders in the UK because they're not that obsessed.
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    (Original post by Brutal Honesty)
    Why don't women in third world countries have this "mental illness"? Why don't working class girls have it as much as middle class girls? Why is it less prevalent in the Asian community (in the UK and US)? The reason is simple, they place less value on hedonism, vanity and self-indulgence whereas white middle class girls are rolling in it. I don't like how everyone panders to them either, show them no attention and they'll soon get their act together. The more you show them you "care" the more it encourages them.
    Its lifestyle and society, but not that of those who suffer, but the world around.
    If your middle class white girl had the responsibility and power to live her life, whilst exisitig in a society that doesnt emphasise perfection, she would be happier, rounded and able to deal with the traumas she faces.

    Whilst I have no doubt that life is hard in certain communities, there is usually still an active routine whereby your purpose is to get water/food/cook/work. The people are in an active community of sorts whilst in middleclass UK, children are phsychologically restrained by parents and soicety, they are tld they must be perfect in a world where they have no power... they face psychological strain whilst having no outlet.
    Your right, a world where you have a purpose (say to feed your family) channels you.... a world where you cant act, you dont feel a purpose yet feel great pressure to achieve, that pushes people to internalise their suffering and subconciously punish themselves.

    This is a notable comparison between our parents era and our own... children are soo much more unhappy now and it kills me :cry2:
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    (Original post by a_t)
    even a place at cambridge?
    Beat me to it, by a looooooooong way :sigh:

    :ahee:
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    (Original post by Brutal Honesty)
    Simple. Our society is more superficial than say, in China so it tends to have a bigger effect on superficial people, i.e. those who buy into it and the concept of the 'ideal body image' that they get from the media. The vast majority of women don't get eating disorders in the UK because they're not that obsessed.
    Chinese people want the 'ideal face image' instead.
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    (Original post by BeanofJelly)
    You're not wrong to say eating disorders are (to an extent) a product of our society, its vanity, its expectations etc. But it goes against your point.

    If eating disorders were some kind of personal flaw, deserving of no sympathy, wouldn't they be evenly distributed amongst populations? Wouldn't there be as many Japanese "narcissists" as Europeans?

    You're contradicting yourself, unless you're trying to argue some kind of innate ethnic superiority.

    Obviously something about western society makes girls feel an act in a worrying way when it comes to their diet and weight. (It's not difficult to a guess what, unless say, you're an idiot) That isn't a reason to "blame" them personally. An eating disorder isn't something you choose to have, it's something that creeps its way into your head and takes over your life. It's a mental illness, to not be sympathetic is to be ignorant. It reflects badly on you and noone else.
    See my previous post. Our superficial society simply enables the behaviour. Assume rape was legal in one country but not in other. There'd be more rapists in the country where it is legal simply because they can get away with it, in the other country there'd it'd be a taboo, discouraged and punished so people wouldn't do it.
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    There's a difference between stupid girls saying "oh im so fat i wanna be anorexic lolz" and girls - or even boys - with a debilitating mental disorder. Get your facts straight.
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    I for one agree with you. Yes, eating disorders are exactly that, disorders, and they're not something that is necessarily within control... but they come about from vanity and the media putting more focus on appearance than just about anything else. I wouldn't say I have absolutely no sympathy for people with eating disorders, no-one deserves that sort of thing, but it is their own fault.
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    (Original post by Brutal Honesty)
    These same pressures exist in other countries, in fact far more pressure. British women get off lightly compared to some of the pressures women in third world countries have to go through yet the rate of eating disorders in those countries are far lower.
    You think people in third world countries feel pressured by all the glossy magazine, films and TV that they're reading and watching huh? You think they feel pressured to excel in all of the exams they're not taking, by all of the peers who talk about sex at the schools they don't go to? You think they're influenced by the pro-ana sites they might go on when they're browsing the internet on their non-existent laptops? Same pressures? What are you on about?

    Different pressures, worse pressures probably, but its a certain kind that leads to eating disorders, and obviously that's going to be pretty rare in the third world. It's not a difficult one to work out.

    Rates of infectious disease are higher in third world countries because of particular conditions that exist in them, is that because people in these countries are weak? So why the distinction when it comes to different exposures --> mental illness.

    What you mean to say is that you unfairly discriminate between mental and physical illness, you think physical illness happens to people and it isn't their fault, but mental illness is actually some kind of personal flaw that people could just get over if they wanted. Stigma 1: Intelligence 0

    Well, maybe you could try to get an education on that one, or maybe you could just stick with what you've decided all by yourself and continue bathing in your own ignorance. I don't suppose anything more that I could say is going to change your opinion.
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    (Original post by kerily)
    I also have AS (small world :awesome:) and I wouldn't equate it to an eating disorder at all in terms of 'suffering'; I see it as a different personality state, and one which mostly brings me an awful lot of advantages. I don't see it as a disadvantage or problem at all, and I find 'sympathy' for it irritating, a waste of time, unproductive and patronising. I suspect you're on the same page with that. I also wouldn't class it as a mental illness.

    I think we agree mostly, actually. I'm mainly saying that people who do suffer and are miserable deserve sympathy, which seems to be pretty much what you're saying tbh
    'Small world'? Hmm...are you being figurative or something?

    Oh yes but my point was that people are using the words "mental illness" as too much of an umbrella term, when they don't know much about what is an illness or what isn't. I don't take blind sympathy very seriously. People are too easy to give it. Well, you know what I mean. That's why I trust Aspie sympathy- there isn't that much to go around. Ha ha.

    Yup
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    (Original post by a_t)
    even a place at cambridge?
    :rofl: Beat me to it.

    (Original post by im so academic)
    It's not as easy as you make it out to be.

    I'd give up anything to be beautiful.
    Why? Being pretty isn't a passport to happiness.
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    **** it, I'll bite.

    And you know this how? People in Asia have a lower reported rate of mental illness, yes, ok I'll give you that one. Why? Because mental illness in Asia is such a taboo that it's rarely spoken about and most people would rather kill themselves or starve to death than go to a doctor about it (and their families would feel the same). Western culture, whilst having a long way to go in terms of acceptance for the mentally ill, is far far more supportive and advanced than the Asian countries are in this area. It's incredibly easy to argue that an eating disorder is a Western culture bound phenomenon as our society dictates that you have to beautiful to be successful. In the third world and Asia etc. the social pressures are more on getting married, raising a successful family or progressing intellectually.
    Thanks for that pretend story. It's well known that aspects of society have a massive effect on prevalence of eating disorders. When TV was introduced to Fiji, eating disorders soon followed despite there having been no sign of this occurring beforehand, you're telling me that the story is a conspiracy and it's always been like that? Give me a break. Also stop talking about it like it's some inherent chemical process in the brain when it isn't. It is a social illness like binge drinking, China doesn't have that either.
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    (Original post by Brutal Honesty)
    Simple. Our society is more superficial than say, in China so it tends to have a bigger effect on superficial people, i.e. those who buy into it and the concept of the 'ideal body image' that they get from the media. The vast majority of women don't get eating disorders in the UK because they're not that obsessed.
    By that logic, people develop eating disorders as a response to being bombarded with so much pressure. Again, it seems that your argument is blaming society rather than the individual.
    For a lot of people that's not even the motivating factor. Some people can develop eating disorders in response to some other trauma they've experienced.

    Our society is built on the idea of free will and responsibility for one's actions, but those with mental illnesses can't be held fully responsible. They need help, not condemnation.
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    (Original post by lukas1051)
    I wouldn't say I have absolutely no sympathy for people with eating disorders, no-one deserves that sort of thing, but it is their own fault.
    This might be one of the most stupid and ignorant things said I have ever seen on TSR.
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    (Original post by Brutal Honesty)
    I was reading this thread and surprise surprise there were plenty of apparently slim girls whining about how fat they are and taking the contradictory stance of knowing they shouldn't be worried about their weight but they still are. Defies all logic. Then they tell other girls they "look fantastic and have an amazing body and any guy would die to go out with you" whilst drowning in self pity about their own body. The UK is incredibly hypocritical in this regard, the same women who are constantly fussing over their weight, diet and body are the same women who tell others "beauty is in the inside". Eating disorders are the product of a superficial, vain lifestyle which is why middle class girls are the ones starving themselves so they can look like their heroes whereas in China and Japan the women are concentrating on important stuff like making the world a more prosperous, scientifically advanced place rather than spending hours flicking through glossy magazines.

    I'd like to take this opportunity to give a :yy: to girls who don't make a big fuss about their appearance and constantly attention seek unlike the eating disorder society who seem to be full of narcissistic self indulgent queens who are willing to endanger their health to look sexually attractive.
    Not true. In places like Korea, China and Japan there's a huge obsession with being slim. Japan has a shockingly high rate of eating disorders among teenage girls and boys, and in Asian societies it's considered taboo to talk about or admit to having an eating disorders. Being an Asian female, there's enormous pressure to lose weight and look good. There's also extremely high rates of plastic surgery in these countries. The beauty industry is huge in these countries, especially Korea, and there's an extreme obsession with the entertainment industry and 'idols.' Overall, what I'm trying to say is from what I've seen the obsession with beauty and weight in Asia is far, far worse than anything I've seen in Britain and the US. In the West I've noticed that although people have self-esteem issues, people are generally more accepting of different types of beauty, whereas in Asia there's one ideal everyone seems to be chasing and if you don't fit it then people will ridicule you.

    If you look at this website: http://www.thickdumplingskin.com/ you can see the sort of pressure Asian women are under to be considered slim and ideal. Being an Asian female myself and being friends with a lot of other Asian girls I've noticed that there's a constant pressure to be thin and look good.
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    (Original post by chinaberry)
    What!

    Don't say that! You're great without having to be pretty I wouldn't have thought you'd have said this.
    Once you get past the awkward teenager stage. You've got personality, ambition, interests...
    Oh really?

    It seems better for a girl to be pretty than to have common sense to receive any sort of respect from men.

    And to other posters, yes, I would give up a place at Cambridge :rolleyes: to be beautiful.

    Let's be honest, it seems that no matter how good you are personality-wise, whatever your ambitions/interests, no matter how intelligent you are, or how nice a person you are - if you don't look pretty, what's the point?

    (I have had this told to me directly. No point being a woman if you're not pretty.)
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    (Original post by Brutal Honesty)
    I was reading this thread and surprise surprise there were plenty of apparently slim girls whining about how fat they are and taking the contradictory stance of knowing they shouldn't be worried about their weight but they still are. Defies all logic. Then they tell other girls they "look fantastic and have an amazing body and any guy would die to go out with you" whilst drowning in self pity about their own body. The UK is incredibly hypocritical in this regard, the same women who are constantly fussing over their weight, diet and body are the same women who tell others "beauty is in the inside". Eating disorders are the product of a superficial, vain lifestyle which is why middle class girls are the ones starving themselves so they can look like their heroes whereas in China and Japan the women are concentrating on important stuff like making the world a more prosperous, scientifically advanced place rather than spending hours flicking through glossy magazines.

    I'd like to take this opportunity to give a :yy: to girls who don't make a big fuss about their appearance and constantly attention seek unlike the eating disorder society who seem to be full of narcissistic self indulgent queens who are willing to endanger their health to look sexually attractive.
    Nice opinion. If you knew anything about the cause and triggers of an eating disorder then you would know that media influence/vanity is a very minute part. The main thing which leads to eating disoders is a need for control over an aspect of their lives, while pictures of skinny models can then perpetuate the disease, this is most often not because they regard those models as being sexually attractive.

    I have a degree in psychology...
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    (Original post by Bubbles*de*Milo)
    Why? Being pretty isn't a passport to happiness.
    I'm being honest with you, my life would be far easier if I were genuinely pretty.
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    (Original post by Brutal Honesty)
    Thanks for that pretend story. It's well known that aspects of society have a massive effect on prevalence of eating disorders. When TV was introduced to Fiji, eating disorders soon followed despite there having been no sign of this occurring beforehand, you're telling me that the story is a conspiracy and it's always been like that? Give me a break. Also stop talking about it like it's some inherent chemical process in the brain when it isn't. It is a social illness like binge drinking, China doesn't have that either.
    But that doesn't make it any less of an illness, does it?

    You need to go and do more research, and find sources that aren't media hyped.
 
 
 
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