Turn on thread page Beta

Should I tell my girlfriend that the day I got with her, before I did, I kissed... watch

  • View Poll Results: Poll.
    Male: Tell her
    10.99%
    Male: Don't tell her
    36.26%
    Female: Tell her
    9.89%
    Female: Don't tell her
    42.86%

    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    another girl?

    I've been with her for over a year and have kept this a secret for so long. I don't know what to say and how she will take it but for some reason, today, now, everything seems to be going so well when I was potentially living a dishonest relationship.

    Last year I was chatting to a girl and some friends and we all met up in a group. I was one of the first to arrive and this other girl who was also there came earlier than some of the others and we got talking, getting to know each other more.

    I didn't tell the girl who I am currently with and later kissed that I was coming as I wanted to surprise her. I really liked her but she didn't feel the same, or atleast I didn't think she didn't and she thought I was a joke.

    So anyway me and the girl (who is now a very good friend of mine) got chatting and we had 1 small, well, about 30 seconds, kiss. It was nice and though I had never met her before, she seemed comfortable and like she liked me too because she smiled straight after.

    Later the others arrived including my now girlfriend and we all got to know each other over lunch and then went for shisha. Towards the end of the meet, I walked my girlfriend to her train station home and kissed the girl who is now my girlfriend and let her know that I was serious when I liked her. This was for much longer than the short/friendly kiss between me and the other friend.

    The friend and my girlfriend get on really well and at the meet they got on well too. The friend liked me at the time and my girlfriend didn't think I was serious so I guess that's why I kissed her back.

    But now I feel guilty and haven't really thought about it since it happened, but now it's been over a year together and we're happy together and for some reason the memory came back to my head and it upset me.

    Should I tell her honestly that I didn't cheat (since it was before I got with her) and there was nothing serious or would it be best to forget it happened and not risk her taking it the wrong way and being hurt? I don't quite know what to do, i'm a bit upset that I did it, but more worried about hiding it from her and her losing trust in me

    Girls, if the above happened, would you want to be told?

    Guys, if you were me, would you tell her?
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    girls would want to know, but you still shouldn't tell her
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Before you got with her? What's the big deal? Not like you cheated on her...
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    This was before you guys actually go together, so no. There is no need
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    So you kissed her before you got with your girlfriend? You weren't technically with you're girlfriend at the time so it shouldn't be too much of a big deal right?
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    It's not necessary, you haven't done anything wrong but it could still cause problems. *****es be crazy...
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    I thought it was going to be something exciting, like a horse's ass or something. I'm disappointed :sad:
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Nigeela4rmBradford)
    another girl?

    Girls, if the above happened, would you want to be told?

    Guys, if you were me, would you tell her?
    If it bothers you, tell her!
    Explai how you feel you need to be honest and you will feel like a load has been lifted off your chest!

    I dont know how he feels but someone kissed me last term (i stopped it but literally didnt see it coming) and in the end, broke and told my boyfriend 2 weeks ago because I needed to not feel like it was a relationship of guilt...

    and, hes still with me and i feel i love him more for not leaving me soo...
    Offline

    8
    ReputationRep:
    Make sure you tell her what you had for lunch too.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    So girls wouldn't care that 6 hours 'before' I got into a long term serious relationship with them, I kissed another girl. Oh, okay then...maybe I won't tell her :dontknow:
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_li...jo1_r1_500.gif
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    if you'd been together 2-3 months then i'd say yes tell her but over a year, there is no need what so ever.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Gemma16)
    if you'd been together 2-3 months then i'd say yes tell her but over a year, there is no need what so ever.
    I don't generally like discussing my past anyway, but I guess I still feel guilty because it was the very same day
    Offline

    12
    ReputationRep:
    I wouldn't tell her. You weren't seeing her at the time. Its not relevant now, you're with her. As long as you don't go cheating on her now, what you did before you got together, albeit the same day, doesn't matter now.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    no possible good could come of it, so no.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Nigeela4rmBradford)
    I don't generally like discussing my past anyway, but I guess I still feel guilty because it was the very same day
    the past is the past, think about the future.
    nothing good is going to come from it, apart from the relief feeling for you. she isn't gonna benefit is she? it may even upset her and make her think why is he mentioning this after so long .. like she might think you like that girl now or she might think you're saying stuff to mess up the relationship..
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    Nothing good can come of telling her! It was before you got together and saying somthing is just going to put bad thoughts and doubts in her head.

    Your not lying by not telling her! If she directly asked (not that she would have any reason to) then be honest but other than that why open that can of the proverbial worms
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    hell no. it was before you guys got together. why cause unneccessary drama?

    stop feeling bad, you did nowt wrong
    • PS Helper
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    PS Helper
    Tbh I wouldn't be bothered about the kiss. I might be a bit worried that you were still thinking about this girl years later..... Just get over it.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    She doesn't need to know. It was before you were with her.
    Just forget about it.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: April 2, 2011
Poll
Is the Big Bang theory correct?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.