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    #1

    hi everyone, i got a problem.

    me and my girlfriend have been together for 3 years now yet we havent had sex once, shes given me handjobs and let me do it her but thats it. I am completely sick of it and when i ask her, she said she will not do it until after marriage, there is a time for it and she doesnt wanna ruin it.

    heres my question to u ladies...she has 1 dildo (which she had hidden from me) until she finally told me she was using it. i was kinda shocked as she wouldnt let me do it but she can with a toy..now i found out she brought another one and she does it nearly every day

    should i feel sad? what should be feeling? ladies if u refuse to have sex yet u used a toy...whats the bloody difference.

    i have been faithful, honest and nice yet not a pussy! i dont force her into things yet i dont wanna be a tool.

    i really do love her and i know how much she loves..
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    I guess it is no different to you having a **** to be honest. What you have to ask yourself is what the likelihood of you getting married to her is?
    It is clear that you love her as you have been with her for 3 years now but if you aren't thinking of popping the question maybe it is time you thought about moving on.
    Alternatively perhaps you could offer to help her use the dildo and then convince her to try the real thing?
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    *w**k
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    goood luck
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    I do love her, she is very dependent on her family and we are currently both in our degrees. We have decided that after our degree is over that we are going to move in together and then i will pop the question. We both have decided on this on what we our futures beholds.

    However, my situation is about marriage cause i know where she and i stand on that. But i dont buy a fake vagina to simulate intercourse. Oh and another thing, i am not the type of sick pervert who just thinks about sex and sex only. I mean she is very very hot, its hard to control yet i have pretty good self control. But if she goes around using a dildo then why not just do the real thing?
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    (Original post by augenblick)
    I guess it is no different to you having a **** to be honest. What you have to ask yourself is what the likelihood of you getting married to her is?
    It is clear that you love her as you have been with her for 3 years now but if you aren't thinking of popping the question maybe it is time you thought about moving on.
    Alternatively perhaps you could offer to help her use the dildo and then convince her to try the real thing?
    There is, fingering and using a dildo is different.

    OP, sex is part of a relationship. If you're not sleeping with her, then you're basically friends with her. Tbh, I would break up with her if she's preferring a toy over me.
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    3 years? You must be some kind of saint.

    Well dildos are different to sex, when you use a vibrator it's just about well....getting yourself off. You don't think about anything but the er, pleasure. It's just a device. Sex is being intimate with someone, you obviously can't get pregnant from a dildo.
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    Sounds a bit strange tbh. What are her reasons for not having sex yet? I would get a clearer answer.
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    she is religious, she is still a virgin at the age of 22.
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    In religious terms, isn't it worse to masturbate than have sex with someone you love, even if you're not married?
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    I suppose you can't get pregnant from a dildo... Is it actually a dildo, or a vibrator, that might be used without actual penetration?
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    this is what society has done to her, she thinks it's better to have sex with a toy that the person she loves. yeah that's sad
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    i think you should use some of the replies on here to her... especially, 'isn't it more sinful to masturbate with a toy than to have sex with the man you want to spend your life with?' ...

    what if when you get married you find out you're not compatible in bed? then you're stuck with someone you dont want to have sex with... great.
    • #2
    #2

    She obviously feels that sex as a very intimate act that should only be carried out by two people who have fully committed to each other by marriage. So what if she uses some rubber thing to get herself off on? She obviously loves you just as much as you love her if you've been together for that long. There's a huge difference between that and the real thing, both physically and emotionally, and while some people see sex as a purely physical thing, others have stronger and deeper feelings as to what it actually means.

    I certainnly wouldn't use it as a reason to dump her as some of the people here have suggested haha...
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i really do love her and i know how much she loves..
    But you know what she loves more...
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    For 3 years!!! mate I think it's time to walk away she has no problem with everything but her boyfriend in her seems dodgy to me......
    • #3
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    i can sort of see where she's coming from

    i dont buy into the whole no-sex-before-marriage thing but even if i did the basic, um, urge would still be there so the toy be for the physical side of things but obvisously the real act would also have an emotional component that the toy couldnt provide

    the toy is simply a stopgap, so to speak
    after three years you should know if you want to marry her or not, and if you really want to marry her you'll respect her religous beliefs and wait
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    You deserve a medal for going three years.

    I guess there's no risk of pregnancy with a toy, but I can't imagine her religion applauding her over the fact she penetrates herself.:rofl:
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    3 years !!!! After 3 weeks I'd have been making moves on her best mate, her sister or her mum.
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    (Original post by augenblick)
    I guess it is no different to you having a **** to be honest. What you have to ask yourself is what the likelihood of you getting married to her is?
    It is clear that you love her as you have been with her for 3 years now but if you aren't thinking of popping the question maybe it is time you thought about moving on.
    Alternatively perhaps you could offer to help her use the dildo and then convince her to try the real thing?
    This. I'm sure you have a w*** so why can't she?
    You've been together for three years, so talk to her about it, she may think that it's tit for tat essentially, if you can do it, why can't she. Waiting until you're married to have sex isn;t about not being ready to, it's about old values I suppose, and how it's meant to be sacred. Respect her wishes as they don't seem likely to change anytime soon.

    That said, it does seem slightly weird, generally don't people who don't want to have sex before marriage avoid masturbating? or is that completely wrong? :s
 
 
 
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