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Why does he ignore me in real life? GRRRR. watch

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    Well I suppose everything is 'real life', but this guy only seems to show interest when he's/we're both wasted - he's all over me and I love it. And then when everything's normal and we're sober he doesn't strike up a conversation or seem into me at all.

    Admittedly, I don't make any effort either... and have rejected sleeping with him twice (only when I first met him, we've made out since!!), but now I don't want to make a fool of myself and come onto him soberly, when it seems textbook 'I'm not into you'. I don't think it's a case of being embarrassed of me or something, i'm not hideous and he'll cuddle me publicly etc (when drunk...). It's just really infuriating when I think it's clear to him i'm now up for it.

    Girls have you had this? I never usually have this problem with guys!! Yeah I know it's pathetic, but it's made me want him more, and I suppose now I have to accept that he's changed his mind or something?
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    Whats his personality like generally? It sounds like he needs a bit of alcohol to relieve him of any inhibitions and give him a boost of confidence. Its probably that you are more flirty when drunk too.
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    guys playing hard to get
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    I believe the answer lies with your mirror.
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    (Original post by Double Agent)
    Whats his personality like generally? It sounds like he needs a bit of alcohol to relieve him of any inhibitions and give him a boost of confidence. Its probably that you are more flirty when drunk too.
    I considered this, but thought no since he's generally popular and outgoing. I don't know him properly though so have no idea how he usually goes about getting girls. Despite seeing me a few times, again the first time we spoke was drunk.

    Why I can't have this one!
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    maybe he's not that into you and just sees you as an easy pull.

    do you actually really like him, or is it just the chase that's making you think you like him more than you do? attempt to chat to him, maybe suggest something casual like going for a drink sometime.. see what happens.
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    I think he's probably just shy or something... Might also think the same of you - that you're only into him when you're drunk!
    Basically, you gotta let him know how you feel, more likely than not he feels the same but is just too shy/unsure to let you know first (this is kinda how i used to be with my current girlfriend).

    Good luck
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    (Original post by Yawn11)
    I believe the answer lies with your mirror.
    Beer goggles? Haha, I'm pretty sure that's not the issue here.
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    i am guy and used to be like this very much. generally i was fairly outgoing and confident - could talk to girls make new friends etc. but for some reason, if i ever liked a girl and thought that she liked me also (to the point where it seemed that it would turn into a 'proper' relationship) i just froze up. i can think of several situations where i liked a girl, and now thinking back on it, it's pretty clear they liked me too. i just didn't really know how to behave when it got to this point. so i basically treated the girl as one of my friends.

    the reason i think that this guy is similar to this is that he seems affectionate when he is drunk (this is the same as i was) because it makes him more confident.

    my advice to you is to be more forward - if you like him, why dont you take the innitiative? this view by girls when they are frustrated that they think a guy likes them but is not doing anything about it annoys me. no-one ever teaches guys how to make the first move, to me it sounds like you are both in the same situation here. why should you wait for him to act? its the 21st century... even just try being more flirty/suggestive when you are sober

    hope this helps
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    He's probably shy...
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    The solution is simple...always carry a small bottle of vodka on you.
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    (Original post by Sophie_girl)
    Beer goggles? Haha, I'm pretty sure that's not the issue here.
    What makes you 'pretty sure'? :sexface:
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    (Original post by ForensicShoe)
    What makes you 'pretty sure'? :sexface:
    She could be crazily hot?
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    There was a guy at uni like this -

    When I first met him he was really funny and friendly, then when we got drunk he got really affectionate and started holding my hand and hugging me and texting me saying I was so hot, how he really liked me etc.

    Then when I saw him again sober he was really awkward and didn't speak to me much. I was really confused because I was sure he liked me when he was drunk but when sober it was like I was the last person he wanted to see.

    Then we kissed one night out but because we had a mutual best friend who obviously had feelings for him, didn't get together.

    Then eventually he plucked up the courage to say he really liked me - and we've been together since (2 years so far).

    Basically - he fancies you and feels more confident when drunk. Text him when your sober and ask to go for coffee.
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    (Original post by Didii)
    She could be crazily hot?
    Pictures or GTFO applies here
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    Maybe he likes you, but as you gave him the brush off at first he pretends not to like you. When he's drunk his guard is down and when you're drunk you pay him attention, so he seems more into you.

    ...Or maybe he doesn't. Can't you ask him?
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    (Original post by Didii)
    The solution is simple...always carry a small bottle of vodka on you.
    Hahahahahaha that made me laugh, perhaps you may be right

    (Original post by ForensicShoe)
    What makes you 'pretty sure'? :sexface:
    No i'm not saying i'm crazily hot, but come on I think it would have happened before if guys saw me in the morning/soberly and were like 'ewwww'. I'm not ugly!

    (Original post by underthesky)
    There was a guy at uni like this -

    When I first met him he was really funny and friendly, then when we got drunk he got really affectionate and started holding my hand and hugging me and texting me saying I was so hot, how he really liked me etc.

    Then when I saw him again sober he was really awkward and didn't speak to me much. I was really confused because I was sure he liked me when he was drunk but when sober it was like I was the last person he wanted to see.

    Then we kissed one night out but because we had a mutual best friend who obviously had feelings for him, didn't get together.

    Then eventually he plucked up the courage to say he really liked me - and we've been together since (2 years so far).

    Basically - he fancies you and feels more confident when drunk. Text him when your sober and ask to go for coffee.
    Ah that's so sweet!! I really hope this is the case, I guess I could make the first move... but i've never done it before... it's scary haha.
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    (Original post by Sophie_girl)


    No i'm not saying i'm crazily hot, but come on I think it would have happened before if guys saw me in the morning/soberly and were like 'ewwww'. I'm not ugly!
    I'm still not convinced!

    Proof needed :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by Hazzaman)
    i am guy and used to be like this very much. generally i was fairly outgoing and confident - could talk to girls make new friends etc. but for some reason, if i ever liked a girl and thought that she liked me also (to the point where it seemed that it would turn into a 'proper' relationship) i just froze up. i can think of several situations where i liked a girl, and now thinking back on it, it's pretty clear they liked me too. i just didn't really know how to behave when it got to this point. so i basically treated the girl as one of my friends.

    the reason i think that this guy is similar to this is that he seems affectionate when he is drunk (this is the same as i was) because it makes him more confident.

    my advice to you is to be more forward - if you like him, why dont you take the innitiative? this view by girls when they are frustrated that they think a guy likes them but is not doing anything about it annoys me. no-one ever teaches guys how to make the first move, to me it sounds like you are both in the same situation here. why should you wait for him to act? its the 21st century... even just try being more flirty/suggestive when you are sober

    hope this helps
    Ahh this is really interesting! Thanks for the advice, it's up to me then I suppose...!
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    (Original post by Sophie_girl)
    Well I suppose everything is 'real life', but this guy only seems to show interest when he's/we're both wasted - he's all over me and I love it. And then when everything's normal and we're sober he doesn't strike up a conversation or seem into me at all.

    Admittedly, I don't make any effort either... and have rejected sleeping with him twice (only when I first met him, we've made out since!!), but now I don't want to make a fool of myself and come onto him soberly, when it seems textbook 'I'm not into you'. I don't think it's a case of being embarrassed of me or something, i'm not hideous and he'll cuddle me publicly etc (when drunk...). It's just really infuriating when I think it's clear to him i'm now up for it.

    Girls have you had this? I never usually have this problem with guys!! Yeah I know it's pathetic, but it's made me want him more, and I suppose now I have to accept that he's changed his mind or something?
    Maybe he wants just a bit of fun with no strings attached and can justify that with the fact he was drunk. On the other hand, he might like/love you subconsciously or secretly but can only show when he's wasted.
 
 
 
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