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Girls and boys who have stayed with their partners after cheating incurred pregnancy. watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Basically my story is, my bf went on a night out a few months ago and about few weeks ago I found out that he had cheated on me that night with a random girl. She had got in contact with him saying she was pregnant. She's got rid of it now but obviously I know if she kept it things would be even more complicated.

    However, I would just like to hear some stories from other people i.e. boys who have got other girls pregnant, boys who's gf's cheated and got pregnant, girls who cheated and got pregnant or girls who's bf's got another girl pregnant. Preferably if the girl got rid of it as that relates to my story but either way I'd like to hear)

    I don't want any stupid answers like break up with him etc thats not what I'm asking. I would just like to hear any stories from people who have stayed with their bf/gf after having gone through this. As in why did you stay together, how did you make it work and is it still working etc?

    Thanks.
    Hey I have been through the same thing only the baby was kept, my boyfirned said it was a drunken mistake and he told me the day after sleeping with her so I obviously was off with him for a while and thne eventually forgave him, however a few weeks later the girl got in touch and said she was pregnant and that she didnt expect him to be involved but she was keeping it. He told me and I moved out for a while as i needed space, he told me that if i didnt want him to have anythiong to do with the abby thats fine but i couldnt do that so I said I wanted him to do what he thought was right so he see's the kid 2 weekends a month; I resent the mother so much but i also still havent forgivien my boyfriend we are together but i dont live with him atm as I am still to raw to completly forgive him but i do see a future...however i think i ma only with him because he was honest about the cheating and told me straight away as for the pregnancey the girl said she was on the pill...i met her and she admitted she lied to my bf thinking that missing it once wouldnt matter :/ so yeha if you wanan chat i cna pm you? x
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    (Original post by Simplicity)
    He made a mistake OP. Forgive him. I'm sure he isn't going to cheat on you anymore and he did tell you.

    I got a friend who was in a similar situation as you. They worked it out and are now happily married. So give it another chance.
    Thank you for something helpful!
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    #1

    (Original post by Xristina)
    Exactly! And he wasn't only stupid, he was also a ******* for not thinking that unprotected sex meant that if he got something he would also give it to his actual gf! That's the point I kept making when a similar thing happened to a friend of mine! The idiot still took him back!
    Well yes we have been over that aswell:/
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    (Original post by Steevee)
    Well, I suppose I could cope with being a stepo figure in the childs life, weekends and such maybe. But I certainley couldn't be a real parent to it.

    I don't know if it's a distinctly male point of view I have. POlease tell me if it is. But Assuming I was a woman, I don't think it would be such a big deal if my partner got another woman pregnant and she kept it. After all, the child is far removed from my everyday life. But to have to raise another man's child as your own day in day out would be, unacceptable to me. In that sense. That's not to say I wouldn;t raise them if I was going into a relationship with eyes open.



    But then, the whole point is moot for me I really don;t like children, and wouldn't go near them, or anyone with them in tow
    Wouldn't you still think it was a big deal that he got someone pregnant in the first place though?
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    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hey I have been through the same thing only the baby was kept, my boyfirned said it was a drunken mistake and he told me the day after sleeping with her so I obviously was off with him for a while and thne eventually forgave him, however a few weeks later the girl got in touch and said she was pregnant and that she didnt expect him to be involved but she was keeping it. He told me and I moved out for a while as i needed space, he told me that if i didnt want him to have anythiong to do with the abby thats fine but i couldnt do that so I said I wanted him to do what he thought was right so he see's the kid 2 weekends a month; I resent the mother so much but i also still havent forgivien my boyfriend we are together but i dont live with him atm as I am still to raw to completly forgive him but i do see a future...however i think i ma only with him because he was honest about the cheating and told me straight away as for the pregnancey the girl said she was on the pill...i met her and she admitted she lied to my bf thinking that missing it once wouldnt matter :/ so yeha if you wanan chat i cna pm you? x
    Thank you for this, I live with my bf too and are currently still living together. He also did say to me that if she kept it he wouldn't expect me to want to have anything to do with the baby. They both knew that being in uni having no money etc a baby wouldn't be a sensible idea though. I love him so much but I don't know if I could forgive him things like that come with time but I can't see myself without him Yess pm me x
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Wouldn't you still think it was a big deal that he got someone pregnant in the first place though?
    Yes, of course. But it is not so much more than just normal cheating. Which is a big thing obviously.

    But to have to raise a child born out of cheating would be far worse in my opinion. I don;t mean to sound chauvanistic or whatever, but that';s just what I think.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you for this, I live with my bf too and are currently still living together. He also did say to me that if she kept it he wouldn't expect me to want to have anything to do with the baby. They both knew that being in uni having no money etc a baby wouldn't be a sensible idea though. I love him so much but I don't know if I could forgive him things like that come with time but I can't see myself without him Yess pm me x
    Hey so pm me as your anon so yeah i have some more stuff i can talk about but would rather not talk here about it :/ xx
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    (Original post by Steevee)
    Yes, of course. But it is not so much more than just normal cheating. Which is a big thing obviously.

    But to have to raise a child born out of cheating would be far worse in my opinion. I don;t mean to sound chauvanistic or whatever, but that';s just what I think.
    I get what you mean - generally the kid would be brought up by the mother in such a situation, so the girlfriend who was cheated on wouldn't have to have any contact at all with the child resultant from the cheating if she didn't want to. But if it was the girl who cheated on the boyfriend and he stayed with her, obviously the child would be being brought up in their house, so he'd be playing dad to another man's child, so it'd feel like much more of an imposition.

    I feel terribly sorry for the children in such cases. A lot of ills in this world come from people being too free and easy with who they leap into bed with.
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    (Original post by RosiL)
    Hey so pm me as your anon so yeah i have some more stuff i can talk about but would rather not talk here about it :/ xx
    Sent, i think not sure if i did it right lol
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Steevee)
    Yes, of course. But it is not so much more than just normal cheating. Which is a big thing obviously.

    But to have to raise a child born out of cheating would be far worse in my opinion. I don;t mean to sound chauvanistic or whatever, but that';s just what I think.
    I get what you're saying but shes had an abortion so (hope this doesn't come across as rude lol) either of us having to bring a child up isn't the issue here.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Well yes we have been over that aswell:/
    And yet you are still telling us you ll give the inconsiderate ******* a second chance. Personally I wouldn't even do it if he had just cheated on me, but putting my health at risk so he can have fun one night? This doesn't only show he doesn't care for your feelings, it also shows he has absolutely no respect for you, and probably doesn't give a damn about your health.

    Good choice!
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    Once a cheat, always a cheat!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Sent, i think not sure if i did it right lol
    You did i've replied xx
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    (Original post by RosiL)
    You did i've replied xx
    Just make sure that if you do move in with your bf eventually and have the kid over (which will happen of course at some point, and when the kid is older I am guessing he/she might want to spend more time with his father than just twice a month) you won't transfer your resentment for the mother (did she know btw that he had a gf? Because if not, it's really not her fault) to the child.
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    #1

    (Original post by Xristina)
    And yet you are still telling us you ll give the inconsiderate ******* a second chance. Personally I wouldn't even do it if he had just cheated on me, but putting my health at risk so he can have fun one night? This doesn't only show he doesn't care for your feelings, it also shows he has absolutely no respect for you, and probably doesn't give a damn about your health.

    Good choice!
    No I haven't said that all, I asked for other peoples experiences I never said what I was doing either way.
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    (Original post by Xristina)
    Just make sure that if you do move in with your bf eventually and have the kid over (which will happen of course at some point, and when the kid is older I am guessing he/she might want to spend more time with his father than just twice a month) you won't transfer your resentment for the mother (did she know btw that he had a gf? Because if not, it's really not her fault) to the child.
    I dunno I didnt really question her about that :/ but yeah...well i won't have much to do with the child as its not mine so yeah
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    (Original post by Simplicity)
    He made a mistake OP. Forgive him. I'm sure he isn't going to cheat on you anymore and he did tell you.

    I got a friend who was in a similar situation as you. They worked it out and are now happily married. So give it another chance.
    You don't even know the guy how can you be so sure he won't do it again?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    No I haven't said that all, I asked for other peoples experiences I never said what I was doing either way.
    You said you are still living with him. Anyway, it's not my business. I couldn't talk my friend out of it, I won't try again.

    The funny thing is that a year later this friend of mine actually tells us how stupid a family friend of hers is for staying with her husband for 30 years despite the constant cheating. WTF?
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    #1

    (Original post by Xristina)
    You said you are still living with him. Anyway, it's not my business. I couldn't talk my friend out of it, I won't try again.

    The funny thing is that a year later this friend of mine actually tells us how stupid a family friend of hers is for staying with her husband for 30 years despite the constant cheating. WTF?
    Yes atm, because i am in uni i cant just move out where am i supposed to go? and i have a contract. living on the streets isn't really my style.
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    (Original post by RosiL)
    I dunno I didnt really question her about that :/ but yeah...well i won't have much to do with the child as its not mine so yeah
    So you never asked your bf if he told her he had a gf? I doubt he did tbh, why would he? So yeah, it's really not her fault is it? She was stupid enough to mess her pill up, but this just means your bf probably has a rather stupid child, other than that that girl did nothing wrong. Don't hate her for your bf's mistakes.
    And yeah, as I said, if you eventually move in together, where do you expect the child to come visit his father? For the love of god, if you think you can't treat the child with affection, don't stay with him. Don't punish the child for his father's mistakes.
 
 
 
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