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i created a mothers day poem-do you like it Watch

  • View Poll Results: What do you think of my poetry
    it was not bad seeing as you hardly do anything like this at all
    3
    18.75%
    it was good, it cheered me up
    1
    6.25%
    it was good, You are clever
    0
    0%
    You are a genius, you will go far in life
    12
    75.00%

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    mothers are there, mothers care
    even when others find it hard to bear
    making cakes, sipping tea
    brings out the best in me
    sometimes I swear and make a fuss
    and then I go out to catch the bus
    I see pretty girls being nice
    I offer them a chocolate mice
    get my ticket and then sit down
    the woman next to me begins to frown
    i move away getting scared
    hoping my clothes don't get teared

    happy mothersday
    that's all i can say
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    My mum would be insulted if I wrote that for her.
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    15
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    You wrote a poem for your mum, and the main focus of it is you getting on a bus and trying to chat up a girl with chocolate mice? :doh:
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    1
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    hahahah
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    1
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    There's no option on your poll for 'terrible'
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    2
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    Your poll is missing the "don't give up the day job" option.

    I can not vote until this is implemented
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    1
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    It starts off OK, then go off on something of a tangent, talking about buses and pretty girls. By the time I got to the chocolate mice you had completely lost me.
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    2
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    I read it as a rap. Still brought tears to my eyes. Beautiful.
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    Where's the line about which seat you chose on the bus? I'm on the edge of my seat here. Also, did you get your bowl and have your cereal?
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    2
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    chocolate mice oh yea
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    9
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    That is well, terrible :P appear to have spent 99% effort trying to cram in rhyming words that don't really fit and the other 1% sticking in nonsense
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    1
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    You and rebecca black would have a very close competition if it came down to a lyrical contest
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    15
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    As a grammar nerd I feel compelled to point out that 'a chocolate mice' is wrong.

    :holmes:
 
 
 
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