I don't know if I'm bisexual or not!?

I'm a girl (I'm 18) and I'm kind of confused... I've always dated boys, and never really thought about girls sexually before now. But just recently, I've sort of been getting turned on at the thought of kissing one of my female friends. I asked another of my friends what she thought, and she looked at me as if I was crazy and said, "Then you're obviously a lesbian!" But the way I feel about this girl is different to the way I feel about the guys I've dated - more intense, and not quite the same. I want to 'be intimate' (lol, but I can't phrase it another way) with this girl so badly, but something's stopping me. The girl I like is openly gay, and has told me she likes me several times now. But why does this feel so different to the sexual attraction I've felt in the past? And does only being attracted to one girl make me bisexual?? :confused:

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Reply 1

goddogit

i know what you mean. i feel it for random women. not people i know personally, just the idea of it doesnt seem too bad.
its very normal. i think all women have some sexual instinct towards women, but i dont know where the line gets crossed and youre begun to be termed as bisexual.

let me know when you do :P

Reply 2

dmz

I'll find another girl and the three of us will come to an appropriate verdict after a session or 2?

Reply 3

Johnny Christ

Easy way to tell...do you get turned on by your own boobs?

Reply 4

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

How many have you dated?

Reply 5

Walter Ego

Do it, if you like it then you're gay/bi, if not then you know you're straight. Either way, life's too short not to try out all the things you fancy, regardless of what others think.

Reply 6

Howbeit

Original post by Anonymous

Experiment with her but make it clear that's all it is. There isn't anything wrong with it if she agrees.

Reply 7

antoastew

Can you hear that? Thats the round of applause from every male user on TSR congratulating this thread.

Reply 8

scorpion95

Possibly, however you won't know until you try, once you have tried then you will either know whether you like the experience of being intimate with other girls or whether you really don't want to get intimate with a girl again. As long as your friend knows it isn't something serious then ask her and go to a certain stage i.e. kissing and if you feel comfortable at that stage take it to the next level but stop when you feel uncomfortable.

The feelings aren't likely to go away and you'll probably regret not trying it

Reply 9

Sashari

That's how I found out I was bi. If you are single then don't hold back, go for it!

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

How many have you dated?

I've had 4 previous relationships, the shortest of which lasted 3 months (the longest lasted nearly 2 years).

Reply 11

Anonymous #3

Talking from personal experience, i think the best way to think about it is sexuality is a spectrum. you're not gay or straight or bi, you can sometimes prefer girls, or sometimes prefer boys. Don't get too hung up on it, you're attracted to whoever you're attracted to..and there's not much you can do about it. Just go with it :smile:

Reply 12

Lexi99

There's no need to put a label on what you are. Some bisexuals like men more, does that make them straight and bi, or if they like women more does it makes them bi and straight?

Dont label yourself and dont worry about if it makes you gay, or bisexual or a zebra. Just do what makes you happy!

Reply 13

kellymichelle

you like one girl and now youre diving straight in to find a label for yourself.
no one can tell you if youre bisexual
just do what you want and youll figure it out yourself in time

Reply 14

Tyler.

Original post by dmz

I'll find another girl and the three of us will come to an appropriate verdict after a session or 2?

If you need an independent adjudicator, I am your man.

Reply 15

planetearth

Don't worry, you're just BI-WINNING!

Reply 16

dmz

Original post by Tyler.

If you need an independent adjudicator, I am your man.

haha, lol

Reply 17

MrsCrackFox

Sexuality is not a simple case of 'You are 100% straight, You are 50:50 bisexual, and you are a 100% gay.
If only it was that simple! I've known a girl who doesn't just like boys, but she's only ever found 1 girl attractive.
There are so many people similar to this. It's not black and white, it's not a case of labelling yourself out of the 3 options.
Just don't fret about it. Does it matter?

Reply 18

i.am.lost

Original post by Johnny Christ

Easy way to tell...do you get turned on by your own boobs?

Gay men don't get turned on by their own penises, neither do lesbians by their own boobs. :rolleyes:

Reply 19

Hravan

Don't worry about it. These things aren't cut and dry... Sexuality is fluid.. People just don't fit into three labels...

Example... One of my friends. Certain that she was straight. Never even fantasied about a girl. Long story short, she's now in a committed relationship with a girl... That girl also thought she was straight. But yeah, they fell in love, been together for nearly 2 years and are buying a house together.