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Boyfriend thinks of other girls while having sex with me watch

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    Just randomly call out some other guys name, and when he asks just say it was "this other guy....."
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It makes me feel really crap and upset. Yes, he did actually tell me this.

    Is it normal?
    If he truly loved you, he would be interested in you, not other girls. I think you already know that.
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    (Original post by doggyfizzel)
    Just randomly call out some other guys name, and when he asks just say it was "this other guy....."
    This.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    It makes me feel really crap and upset. Yes, he did actually tell me this.

    Is it normal?
    In what context did he mention this?
    was he purposely trying to make you insecure or was he just openly talking about his fantasies?
    I'd say there are two possibilities to this, it may be a classik case of the grass is greener on the other side syndrome, now that he's got you, he doesn't appreciate sleeping with you, the way he may when your gone, had a similar thing with an ex girlfriend, while I was with her I took it very much for granted, now that's she's gone, the perspectives completely flipped.
    However another possibility, depending on the tone and the mood of the conversation could be that he's not that physically attracted to you. Whilst I disagree with the entire "dump that ********" culture surrounding these threads, if that's the case, you truly are best moving on.
    Hope it all works out for you.
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    Very common, but can understand why you're upset; it sounds like he was pretty insensitive about it. If it's girls he knows in real life; that's when you've got reason to worry though.
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    tell him you think of his brother while having sex with him...that'll show him!
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    The thoughts themselves aren't that big of a deal, a simple human flaw basically, but for him to actually tell you is pretty whack.
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    not during sex. During oral sex maybe. I needed several people at a point
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    After several months of constant sex with one person I'm 100% positive all guys think of other girls. I know i did.


    I have no idea why he would tell you though.
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    Thinking about other girls is normal, but not during sex ffs.
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    only an insensetive idiot would tell you he was thinking of someone else
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    I think its normal... :ninjagirl:
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    (Original post by Rascacielos)
    If he truly loved you, he would be interested in you, not other girls. I think you already know that.
    Glad to know that we can assess love entirely by behaviour, and/or that the problem of other minds has been over come. When will you publish your psychological or scientific, or even both, articles in respected journals? Because I'm looking forward to reading them.
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    (Original post by doggyfizzel)
    Just randomly call out some other guys name, and when he asks just say it was "this other guy....."
    Yeah, totally this.

    While thinking about other people you find attractive (during sex or not) is perfectly normal I personally think it is insensitive to tell your partner any of the specifics. ESPECIALLY if it is someone you know IRL. On the other hand, some people are happy to be very open about such things, the key is to make sure you are both on the same page before unleashing the unreserved honesty. Or someone will get hurt.
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    I haven't experienced a long term relationship, so wouldn't be able to know if this was the case. I'd be upset & offended if I heard something like that though. There seems to be a split in opinions. Does everyone fantasise, man or woman, after having since with their long term partner for a while?
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    God that's horrible! I'd be really upset if my bf told me that!

    You should let him know how upset you are about him saying/doing something like that! Ask why the hell he thinks of other women and not you. I mean seeing as I'm not a guy I couldn't say how 'normal' it is for a guy to think of another woman whilst having sex but surely if they were, why would they tell their gf?! Are they stupid enough to think that women would just take it in their stride if told this! Craaaaaaazy!! .
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    Normal.
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    (Original post by there's too much love)
    Glad to know that we can assess love entirely by behaviour, and/or that the problem of other minds has been over come. When will you publish your psychological or scientific, or even both, articles in respected journals? Because I'm looking forward to reading them.
    Oh, so you think it's acceptable for a man to be fantasizing about other women whilst having sex with the one he's supposed to be in love with? And, by that reasoning, it's is incorrect that a woman (or man) should feel insecure as a result of their partner doing so?
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    (Original post by Rascacielos)
    Oh, so you think it's acceptable for a man to be fantasizing about other women whilst having sex with the one he's supposed to be in love with? And, by that reasoning, it's is incorrect that a woman (or man) should feel insecure as a result of their partner doing so?
    I don't think it's acceptable, but your argument was about his emotions, not whether it is or isn't acceptable.
    I also made no judgement there in whether it's rational to feel insecure or not, I think there is certainly a legitimate reason for the OP to feel insecure, I would, I can't think of anyone who wouldn't be, and there are obvious rational reasons why.

    Your arguments against me are based on mixing up 3 different issues.
    His emotions.
    Whether his behaviour is acceptable.
    Whether it's rational/reasonable/legimiate for the OP to feel insecure.
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    DTMFA

    Dump that Motherf--ker's ass.
 
 
 
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