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    People who give 'hints' are usually people who don't have the balls to tell somebody how the situation is.

    Ignoring is rude. I save ignoring for people who are out of order or are incessantly persistent. Girls use ignoring as a technique for communicating "I'm not interested in you" because they don't know how to say it. But girls invariably HATE with a passion, being ignored themselves.

    Last 2 girls I've been seeing, one I dumped her the other she dumped me. When I did the dumping, I sat down with her in private, with no one else around, told her that I wanted to go back to being single, then when she fired all sorts of "why" questions, like "was it because of this..." I just answered them. A few weeks later she sent me this long email asking loads of stuff about why we had split up and I answered all those questions as well. I didn't leave any ambiguity over the fact that I had decided it was over, I wasn't trying to keep her as an 'option' but I knew she was upset about the break up so I thought she deserved to have answers to her questions.

    Then it came to me being dumped but this was from a pretty short term thing (6 weeks or so). We'd been for lunch and seen each other on the Thursday, getting on fine. Talked a bit on Facebook chat on the Saturday, then that was it. She stopped answering calls, stopped answering texts and disappeared. After a few days of trying to contact her and being a bit worried about where she was, I sent her a facebook message, she ignored it, but I knew she was on facebook because she was 'liking' stuff. It slowly dawned on me over a period of about a week that she had obviously wanted to end it. I was annoyed at this because I didn't know where I stood, and I kept trying to get in touch with her because I thought something must be wrong and I didn't expect her to just cut me off after we had been speaking to each other every day for the previous 6 weeks. What sealed it was, a week or so later she was engaging in flirty facebook wall banter with her ex, so thats when I knew obviously it was up. I never heard from her again and after about a month she deleted me off facebook. Can't say it left me devastated or anything but it annoyed me that I didn't know what the situation was and I wasted a week wondering what was going on where if she'd have just said she wanted to end it I would have known the score.
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    (Original post by emmi_lou)
    but suppose they aren't cryptic???

    for instance, when they know you have nothing to do, you know they're free and you mention A LOT well wouldn't it be nice to have some company.... how nice it'd be if we could meet up...

    how much more obvious and uncryptic could it be??
    Well if you are being that uncryptic and obvious, why not just say outright that you would like to do something? It's hardly much of a shift and it makes it easier for your partner to understand.

    I did precisely what you describe above for valentines day (we were not quite together), got annoyed that he didnt take the hint and after he found out that I was miffed asked me why I didn't just clearly say that I wanted to do something for valentines day.

    Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and say what you mean.
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    (Original post by Drunk Punx)
    This concerns both of your statements; women confuse the hell out of me :sad:
    we try not to be confusing honestly
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    (Original post by Dr Pressure)
    speaking as a 20 year old virgin who has never kissed a girl before, i am unsure if i should make a move on a girl unless she gives obvious hints or tells me outright that she likes me.

    i dont want to appear desperate or be slapped in the face for making a move if she didnt want me to. i stay on the side of caution and if i think she might or might not want me to make a move, i will wait until the signals are more obvious.
    I strongly support OP's point....Likewise, its a very tense situation.....& one would not want to make a stupid move....
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    (Original post by emmi_lou)
    but suppose they aren't cryptic???

    for instance, when they know you have nothing to do, you know they're free and you mention A LOT well wouldn't it be nice to have some company.... how nice it'd be if we could meet up...

    how much more obvious and uncryptic could it be??
    well you could just say you want his company or even suggest a place to go or thing to do. though to be completely honest i think even i would pick up on that hint
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    (Original post by emmi_lou)
    As the title suggests, what's up with you guys and taking a hint??

    If it's not "please leave me alone" or "i really want to see you" no matter how hard we try, you guys never seem to pick up on a hint.....

    Is this down to just bad hint giving skills, or just an inability to recognise them???
    ****ing :troll:s and tsr...We do not represent the population fo male people on this earth (as hard as we try. :holmes: )
    Also, speak to the guy you're having a crack at not us, all we do is get pissed when a :troll: like you comes on and has a go at us..
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    (Original post by emmi_lou)
    i know that but all i'm saying is how blindingly obvious does the hint have to be before it's recognised?
    Tell guys what you want of them directly and you wont have this problem. Killing the uncertainty in the guys mind would help the both of you as well.
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    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    In that situation why don't you just send a text back saying "sorry but I am not interested in you"?
    But when they are sending texts that are not too forward but you know they like you, just asking about your day etcetc wouldn't it be a bit out of order and look presumptive/arrogant to just bulldoze right in with 'mate **** off i don't fancy you' ?
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    (Original post by Eveiebaby)
    Well if you are being that uncryptic and obvious, why not just say outright that you would like to do something? It's hardly much of a shift and it makes it easier for your partner to understand.

    I did precisely what you describe above for valentines day (we were not quite together), got annoyed that he didnt take the hint and after he found out that I was miffed asked me why I didn't just clearly say that I wanted to do something for valentines day.

    Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and say what you mean.
    i would but like i've mentioned previously you start to feel a bit of a nag cos it's always me that suggests doing something, and as i'm sure you'll know sometimes it's nice from it to come from someone else and not always you...
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    (Original post by emmi_lou)
    As the title suggests, what's up with you guys and taking a hint??

    If it's not "please leave me alone" or "i really want to see you" no matter how hard we try, you guys never seem to pick up on a hint.....

    Is this down to just bad hint giving skills, or just an inability to recognise them???
    We're that bad with hints we're not even sure what you'd mean by that
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    (Original post by subbacultcha.)
    But when they are sending texts that are not too forward but you know they like you, just asking about your day etcetc wouldn't it be a bit out of order and look presumptive/arrogant to just bulldoze right in with 'mate **** off i don't fancy you' ?
    And yet you can't assume people can mind read, because for the most part they cannot.
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    (Original post by emmi_lou)
    i would but like i've mentioned previously you start to feel a bit of a nag cos it's always me that suggests doing something, and as i'm sure you'll know sometimes it's nice from it to come from someone else and not always you...
    i don't see what difference it makes who suggests it. both people should be capable of saying no if they don't want to go.


    though he should make some effort of course
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    (Original post by siwelmail)
    ****ing :troll:s and tsr...We do not represent the population fo male people on this earth (as hard as we try. :holmes: )
    Also, speak to the guy you're having a crack at not us, all we do is get pissed when a :troll: like you comes on and has a go at us..
    well i wasn't exactly asking for the earth's male population's opinion or replies just maybe other people's ideas on the subject...

    Oh and thanks for calling me a troll, so lovely when i was just curious about something, like you've never been curios in your life... :eek:


    P.S. I haven't actually personally, verbally attacked anyone on here
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    (Original post by Drunk Punx)
    This concerns both of your statements; women confuse the hell out of me :sad:
    I've come to accept they don't know what they want.
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    (Original post by WelshBluebird)
    And yet you can't assume people can mind read, because for the most part they cannot.
    But when we give short non descript answers, polite but cold then it would be obvious, no? and avoid the humilation to the guy of being shot down before he's even made a move? If we liked you we would be enthusiastic and friendly surely that is not rocket science to work out.
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    (Original post by curtis871)
    i don't see what difference it makes who suggests it. both people should be capable of saying no if they don't want to go.


    though he should make some effort of course
    this is my problem, i don't wanna make soo much effort it gets annoying so hope by dropping hints he'll make an effort to suggest things
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    (Original post by emmi_lou)
    As the title suggests, what's up with you guys and taking a hint??

    If it's not "please leave me alone" or "i really want to see you" no matter how hard we try, you guys never seem to pick up on a hint.....

    Is this down to just bad hint giving skills, or just an inability to recognise them???
    I could say the same about a few girls I know!
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    (Original post by MagicNMedicine)
    People who give 'hints' are usually people who don't have the balls to tell somebody how the situation is.

    Ignoring is rude. I save ignoring for people who are out of order or are incessantly persistent. Girls use ignoring as a technique for communicating "I'm not interested in you" because they don't know how to say it. But girls invariably HATE with a passion, being ignored themselves.

    Last 2 girls I've been seeing, one I dumped her the other she dumped me. When I did the dumping, I sat down with her in private, with no one else around, told her that I wanted to go back to being single, then when she fired all sorts of "why" questions, like "was it because of this..." I just answered them. A few weeks later she sent me this long email asking loads of stuff about why we had split up and I answered all those questions as well. I didn't leave any ambiguity over the fact that I had decided it was over, I wasn't trying to keep her as an 'option' but I knew she was upset about the break up so I thought she deserved to have answers to her questions.

    Then it came to me being dumped but this was from a pretty short term thing (6 weeks or so). We'd been for lunch and seen each other on the Thursday, getting on fine. Talked a bit on Facebook chat on the Saturday, then that was it. She stopped answering calls, stopped answering texts and disappeared. After a few days of trying to contact her and being a bit worried about where she was, I sent her a facebook message, she ignored it, but I knew she was on facebook because she was 'liking' stuff. It slowly dawned on me over a period of about a week that she had obviously wanted to end it. I was annoyed at this because I didn't know where I stood, and I kept trying to get in touch with her because I thought something must be wrong and I didn't expect her to just cut me off after we had been speaking to each other every day for the previous 6 weeks. What sealed it was, a week or so later she was engaging in flirty facebook wall banter with her ex, so thats when I knew obviously it was up. I never heard from her again and after about a month she deleted me off facebook. Can't say it left me devastated or anything but it annoyed me that I didn't know what the situation was and I wasted a week wondering what was going on where if she'd have just said she wanted to end it I would have known the score.
    i'm sorry for you, that's quite a nasty, mean thing to do...

    i wouldn't go so far as to use the 'ignoring' hint tactic, i suppose you're right in these circumstances that by ignoring you she'd hope you'd take the hint and leave her alone, and that she couldn't face up to the situation....

    this type of hinting i don't even know if it's classed as hinting but just plain ignorance and rudeness
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    God I hate people who add the "lou"at the end of their names.

    da **** is wrong with you?
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    (Original post by 2ndClass)
    God I hate people who add the "lou"at the end of their names.

    da **** is wrong with you?
    nothing really, my middle name is louise so i shortened it... no lie
 
 
 
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