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    (Original post by Young Spade)

    Hmm? No I'm talking about the actual existance of something, anything for that matter. If you don't know about it, it doesn't exist to you.

    Could be love, hate, fat, sad, words, language constructs how we think about things. We are mentally limited by our language. If you can't describe something to me because you can't find the right words to, you are limited in your understanding of that object.

    If you have never heard of love before, how would you describe that feeling? Warm? Powerful? Soft? Calm? Tremendous? Of course those are adjectives and stil don't give a definition of what the feeling is.

    Thus, love does not exist to you.
    i understand your point, but what i'm saying, is that argument trumps every feeling/emotion/political standpoint/ ANYTHING not physical.
    what i'm saying is BECAUSE it's such an 'ultimate argument' it becomes a null argument. because to use it, takes the meaning away from pretty much everything.
    so, for the sake of argument, and to continue everyday lie, and have relationships, bonds, thoughts, feelings, emotions etc. it is necessary to set that point aside
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    Nothing exists.
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    well love may never exist for some people, and If you carry on with that attitude, it never will :P
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    Well; many would argue that everything we do is selfish, and that we "love" merely to secure protection for our offspring. But if that's what "love" is, then it still exists, surely? I actually feel genuinely sorry for you if you're so cynical about it, because relationships can be amazing
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    If love does not exist the mankind won't.
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    (Original post by Peachykeen09)
    of course it doesn't. the best thing to do is hook up with guys with no strings attached :cool:
    and im here and waiting :-)
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    Agreed, there are many, many different types of love: friendships, family relationships, romantic relationships etc. I don't think you can really dismiss 'Love' in general because there are so many different types - maybe OP should have said which type of love you don't believe in specifically if thats the case?

    I've been in and out of romantic relationships since my early teens and I'm now in a stable relationship which has taken 3 years for us to get together: thanks to this I think we appreciate each other a hell of alot more than we would have if we'd got together straight away. In my situation I know we love each other as it's not just about what you do for other people it's also about how much you can be there for each other - physically and emotionally.

    Not to sound rude, but if you've never been in a relationship then I don't agree that you're in a position to dismiss or endorse 'love' in that form as you have no experience - spectator or not, you don't know what its truly like until you experience it. Watching something is very, very different from experiencing it: if you're watching a marathon you don't know how it feels for the people running it unless you're running it with them - in my opinion the same applies to love...

    To be quite honest (without sounding rude) I also feel sorry for you, as you obviously possess no capicity to think in any other way than that of a cynic and that is gonna leave you with alot of sadness in your life!
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    Have you ever listened to Grenade?
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    (Original post by hatemylife)
    I'm not sure I believe love exists. I don't understand it, which isn't why I don't believe in it, but I do not believe that there is either some mystical joining of two humans, or that anyone could truly be so genuinely selfless for another.

    Would you agree?

    And yes, I know this has been done before, but hey-ho.
    I don't think it is mystical. It's just a state of mind really. It isn't about selfless acts either. I think it is more about wanting that person to be as happy as possible. Not wanting them to suffer. Wanting the best for them etc.
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    (Original post by Mad Cat Lady)
    Have you ever listened to Grenade?
    That song is PROOF that love (albeit unrequited) exists... PROOF, I tell ya
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    (Original post by hatemylife)
    I'm not sure I believe love exists. I don't understand it, which isn't why I don't believe in it, but I do not believe that there is either some mystical joining of two humans, or that anyone could truly be so genuinely selfless for another.

    Would you agree?

    And yes, I know this has been done before, but hey-ho.
    True story. But "you" don't exist either, other than as a series of chemical reactions.
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    Deep... So deep...
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    (Original post by hatemylife)
    No, I've never had a relationship (19...)

    Well, I really do believe that even the smallest of 'selfless' acts are selfishly motivated. I acknowledge this of myself, in fact particularly myself. IT DOESN'T EXIST!
    There's no such thing as a "selfless act" Pheobe and Joey should have taught you that in friends! If you do something for someone and it makes them happy, it makes you happy too there's nothing wrong with that!

    And love exists, you'll just have to wait and see
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    But all the people who claim to be in Love can't be lying!
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    (Original post by hatemylife)
    I'm not sure I believe love exists. I don't understand it, which isn't why I don't believe in it, but I do not believe that there is either some mystical joining of two humans, or that anyone could truly be so genuinely selfless for another.

    Would you agree?

    And yes, I know this has been done before, but hey-ho.
    Love most definitely does exist. I don't think you can deny the protective love most mothers feel towards their offspring.

    In terms of romantic love, I believe that exists too. I think it takes time for it to develop into a kind of love where you would do literally anything for that other person, but it exists, I know
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    To answer seriously though, it's my opinion that it does exist, even if it doesn't. And it's possible that it does exist for me but not for you.
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    (Original post by hatemylife)
    I'm not sure I believe love exists. I don't understand it, which isn't why I don't believe in it, but I do not believe that there is either some mystical joining of two humans, or that anyone could truly be so genuinely selfless for another.

    Would you agree?

    And yes, I know this has been done before, but hey-ho.
    I don't know whether you're religious/spritual or not but it might interest you to read The Four Loves by C.S. Lewis. It talks about all different kinds of love in a Christian light. Even if you're not a Christian and/or don't believe in God, his discussions might benefit you. He writes about how love almost always has a selfish/underlying motive... but how that doesn't mean that it isn't love. He points to true selflessness being rare and coming from something beyond normal humanity (depending on your belief system, you might choose not to buy into that)... but that still doesn't mean our daily dealings with each other can't be called love.

    I've always believed in love but never really understand what it meant and didn't think the elevated/supernatural Jane-Eyre-hearing-Mr-Rochester-calling-for-her-from-the-other-side-of-the-country kinda love existed. That all changed for me about 18 months ago. (That's not to say I'm necessarily right, of course!) I also didn't believe I could love anyone properly or be able to accept anyone else's love but surprised myself by managing it
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    (Original post by Arnotts)
    Well I've been in love with someone for 8 years, like unconditional I would die for you heartwrenching no one else compares kind of love. So if it turns out its not love what is it?
    (Original post by dizzy09)
    Ahh, but you don't have kids... you don't know...
    Believe me, when you get a knot in your stomach when your little one cries over a scraped knee... Or when you wish to high heaven you were ill instead of them, then hell... surely that's love?
    (Original post by xEndeavors)
    Bad breakup, hon? :console:
    Well, I fail to agree that it was love. 'Love' is motivated out of selfishness. The reason you want a partner might be so they can look after you. You're gaining. One who argues that they love cuddling, hugging, kissing what-have-you, is all about them making their partner feel better is misguided, in my opinion. You benefit, for want of a better word, directly from all the aforesaid, and the feeling that you are pleasing your partner makes you feel better. I think most of this is sub-conscious, suppressed by years of conditioning and the typical romantic novel (I'm not knocking, I did English Literature )

    Rather fittingly with the above, we were discussing this once in my English Literature class. Bluntly: Parents are proud and protective of their children because they are a part of them. They are representing them. Not because of some undying love. The mother, in particular, 'loves' her child because she's invested so much pain and energy in getting it to this world. It's her possession to show of. Why do you think parents are offended when someone insults their child? Because effectively, they are insulting them. My English Literature teacher remarked, when asked, that she would dye for her children, but not for her husband. Why? Because they are a part of he, physically, and she's protecting number one.

    No
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    (Original post by Prettygeek)
    well love may never exist for some people, and If you carry on with that attitude, it never will :P
    Most probably As I say, I really don't think I will. Firstly because it doesn't exist (!) but more importantly, if it does, one needs to open up to it and accept another's love - I could never do that.

    (Original post by mexicanbasterd)
    I just told my girlfriend I love her...you know once you know and maaaan it just hits you
    I don't think it is love...

    (Original post by Gemma :)!)
    Well; many would argue that everything we do is selfish, and that we "love" merely to secure protection for our offspring. But if that's what "love" is, then it still exists, surely? I actually feel genuinely sorry for you if you're so cynical about it, because relationships can be amazing
    Yes, I agree to an extent that what they do is to protect their offspring (read my response about my teacher above ^^^), but no, I don't think it is 'love'. It is pride, arrogance, selfishness, selfish perpetuity masquerading as what people define as love. An amalgam of vices doesn't make a virtue.



    (Original post by smokeyjo92)
    Agreed, there are many, many different types of love: friendships, family relationships, romantic relationships etc. I don't think you can really dismiss 'Love' in general because there are so many different types - maybe OP should have said which type of love you don't believe in specifically if thats the case?

    I've been in and out of romantic relationships since my early teens and I'm now in a stable relationship which has taken 3 years for us to get together: thanks to this I think we appreciate each other a hell of alot more than we would have if we'd got together straight away. In my situation I know we love each other as it's not just about what you do for other people it's also about how much you can be there for each other - physically and emotionally.

    Not to sound rude, but if you've never been in a relationship then I don't agree that you're in a position to dismiss or endorse 'love' in that form as you have no experience - spectator or not, you don't know what its truly like until you experience it. Watching something is very, very different from experiencing it: if you're watching a marathon you don't know how it feels for the people running it unless you're running it with them - in my opinion the same applies to love...

    To be quite honest (without sounding rude) I also feel sorry for you, as you obviously possess no capicity to think in any other way than that of a cynic and that is gonna leave you with alot of sadness in your life!
    I did briefly mention it before - all types of love.

    Not to sound rude also, but I think the time taken to get together doesn't intensify your 'love', I think you've just invested so much time in arranging the whole circumstance that you're wary of it being in vain. As such, you're treading more carefully, treating the other with more respect, shall we say, so as not to jeopardise it.

    I disagree. The fact that I am in the arena of life suggests that I am as equally qualified to comment as any other. Just because I don't play football in a stadium doesn't mean I can't play on a patch of grass. If love is such a human emotion that is seemingly everywhere, then I have just as much valid experience of it, whether I have been 'in it' or not, as anyone else

    (Original post by Mad Cat Lady)
    Have you ever listened to Grenade?
    No.

    (Original post by moody_bum)
    But all the people who claim to be in Love can't be lying!
    Not lying, but certainly misguided.

    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    I don't know whether you're religious/spritual or not but it might interest you to read The Four Loves by C.S. Lewis. It talks about all different kinds of love in a Christian light. Even if you're not a Christian and/or don't believe in God, his discussions might benefit you. He writes about how love almost always has a selfish/underlying motive... but how that doesn't mean that it isn't love. He points to true selflessness being rare and coming from something beyond normal humanity (depending on your belief system, you might choose not to buy into that)... but that still doesn't mean our daily dealings with each other can't be called love.

    I've always believed in love but never really understand what it meant and didn't think the elevated/supernatural Jane-Eyre-hearing-Mr-Rochester-calling-for-her-from-the-other-side-of-the-country kinda love existed. That all changed for me about 18 months ago. (That's not to say I'm necessarily right, of course!) I also didn't believe I could love anyone properly or be able to accept anyone else's love but surprised myself by managing it
    I'm a little bit jarred by your saying that I might benefit from reading it. It suggests that I need remedying. From your post, it sounds as though Lewis and I are singing from the same hymn sheet, albeit in slightly different keys I don't think there is a redemption in that selfish goings-on are still essentially love. I similarly don't concur that true selflessness is rare - it's non-existent!

    When you mention Jane Eyre, I think of a haven for the idea of love, along with any other Bronte, of Austen for that matter, novels. 'Love' is truly the preserve of idealistic spinsters and poets. Even in those days, love rarely existed, certainly, marriages were almost never based upon love...
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    (Original post by hatemylife)
    I'm not sure I believe love exists. I don't understand it, which isn't why I don't believe in it, but I do not believe that there is either some mystical joining of two humans, or that anyone could truly be so genuinely selfless for another.

    Would you agree?

    And yes, I know this has been done before, but hey-ho.
    I'm dubious too. It seems too far-fetched. If every person only ever loves a few people in their life out of all the people they ever meet the probability of the feelings being reciprocated is miniscule.

    I think that people want to believe they're in love and so tell themselves they are, thus convincing their subconcious to release the necessary endorphins. Not, that people fall in love subconciously which creates a feeling felt conciously. I believe the feeling would be the same but the idea of 'falling in love' is innacurate, I think it's probably more a concious decision someone makes that they want to be in love.

    Then on the other hand you have the arguement that so many people claim to have experienced genuine love. Although
    i suppose the world was flat and diseases were spread by planets being out of alignment until science disproved everyone.
 
 
 
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