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what to do if u dislike sex

I slept with the guy im seeing last nite. and now i dont know wat to do as i really dont enjoy it. not even the fore play bit. i just find the whole thing uncomfortable and stressful. i wasnt a virgin ive had sex 4or5 times before and always felt this way. now i dont know wat to do as this guy will think that we'r at the sex stage now. and i dont want to again. more worrying is how am i going to have a proper relationship in the future. does anyone else feel like this.?

Reply 1

willey

4

chel

I slept with the guy im seeing last nite. and now i dont know wat to do as i really dont enjoy it. not even the fore play bit. i just find the whole thing uncomfortable and stressful. i wasnt a virgin ive had sex 4or5 times before and always felt this way. now i dont know wat to do as this guy will think that we'r at the sex stage now. and i dont want to again. more worrying is how am i going to have a proper relationship in the future. does anyone else feel like this.?

u obviously havent met a guy that satisfys u yet :biggrin:

Reply 2

blissy

15

Wait till you're comfortable (and preferaby in love!) with the other person before having sex and you will probably find a huge improvement. Sex takes a while to get right, so don't give up on it if you find the right person who you feel comfortable doing it with. Don't have sex if you're not enjoying it (you didn't like the foreplay so why move on to sex?) because it will generally leave you feeling unhappy, useless and used.

In short: wait, but when you feel happy doing it give it a chance. Go slowly, don't do anything you don't want to, explore and learn to enjoy.
edit: and use a condom :biggrin:

Reply 3

The Crow

1

how bout ermmmm not doing it!!! :P sorry if thats not helpful but it had to be said....

Reply 4

cheesecakebobby

9

Become a Christian, they hate sex too.

Reply 5

ellewoods

10

I know exactly how you feel - it wasnt until I met my boyfriend (3rd person Iv slept with) and until we'd been together six or eight months that I really started enjoying myself. :smile:

Give it time, have a bit of faith and relax :wink:

Reply 6

hippieglitter

19

cheesecakebobby

Become a Christian, they hate sex too.

Hey, I'm a christian and I love sex.

Reply 7

Trigger

18

bad christain*hits with newspaper* :biggrin:

Reply 8

Antonius Varus

Out of wedlock?!?!?! 'TIS A SIN!!!

*taking the mick*

Reply 9

gideon2000uk

9

You might be asexual. Again. You are not alone. In fact, there was another thread along a similar line some time ago.

Only you will know if you simply do not like sex or if it is just something you find uncomfortable.

When I first started having sex with my partner it took me at least a month before I reached climax because I found the whole experience so stressful.

Reply 10

cheesecakebobby

9

gideon2000uk

You might be asexual. Again. You are not alone. In fact, there was another thread along a similar line some time ago.

Only you will know if you simply do not like sex or if it is just something you find uncomfortable.

When I first started having sex with my partner it took me at least a month before I reached climax because I found the whole experience so stressful.

It took you a month to orgasm? :eek:

I'm happy if I last an hour

Reply 11

jordanv

1

trigger

bad christain*hits with newspaper* :biggrin:

yeah those darn christstains

p.s.: why are you reading a newspaper when everything you will ever need to know is in the bible????????11111?!?1/!1111?!// :confused:

p.p.s: still joking

Reply 12

lovelee-jublee

12

cheesecakebobby

It took you a month to orgasm? :eek:

I'm happy if I last an hour

Maybe you should talk to your current partner and tell him what it is you don't like. You can talk about what he can do to make it better, and maybe what you can do to get yourself in the mood etc.

Reply 13

peperharow

2

Ant93

Hey, I'm a christian and I love sex.

That's terrific news :biggrin:

Reply 14

Checking for Spies

10

You probably just need to relax....

Reply 15

lauzy

Maybe its just boring so it doesn't excite you? I probably shouldn't admit this but I was the same (not really excited that much by it all) until I started doing "risky" things, like outdoor sex, in the shower etc... the excitement and risk of it all really gets me going!! :biggrin:

Reply 16

Tim Street

what is there not to like about sex?

Reply 17

Little Girl Red

1

Become a Christian, they hate sex too.

I'm a christian, I dont have sex before marriage. Surprisingly (hear the sarcasm there), I dont hate sex. I just would rather have sex within the confines of marriage where i can enjoy it without wondering if the relationship will end or whether he will call me in the morning or whether if i say i dont want to do something he will dump me etc etc.
Call me old-fashioned but I want to be properly in love and properly committed to somebody for the rest of my life before I sleep with them.
However, if you said I hate sex you'd be barking mad. If you ask me, Christians who dont have sex before marriage will be hornier than somebody who does. Ever tried abstinence?
A challenge: if you have a girlfriend/boyfriend, try abstaining for a month. Then sleep together again. Bet you it is more fantastic than any sex you've had before. Then imagine abstaining for several years before climbing in to bed with the man/woman of your dreams, who you will spend the rest of your life with. Now that is the sex that I am waiting for.

So: Christians hate sex? Um....... no. Perhaps we just respect it a bit more.

Reply 18

Little Girl Red

1

I've always wondered if not having sex might end up making christians jump into marrying people because they're desperate to have some sex, rather than them being truly in love.

Not really. I mean, it is a tricky topic. But those Christians who have made for themselves the HUGE commitment of abstaining before marriage also really take a lot of time to pray and take busloads of advice from their parents, other christians, married couples etc as well as reading the bible before they take the decision to get married. I am currently in this position, deciding whether to get married, and I can tell you that it is not a decision that I am taking lightly. I can safely say that sex is not a huge part of my life. It will great when I can have it with my husband, but I dont wake up everyday thinking "oooh, i just need to get laid".

Also, if you love eachother with all of your hearts, I just don't see how you can be sexually incompatible. Sex is about joining yourelves together and expressing your love for each other. If you love each other enough to get married, how can you be sexually incompatible? I just dont understand.

Reply 19

Silhouette

cheesecakebobby

Become a Christian, they hate sex too.

Funny you should say that. One of best mates is a Christan and ends up going out with many of the girls from the church he goes to, and yes, he does have sex. You dirty Christians you!!!

what to do if u dislike sex

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