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How to repair a three-year old rift with once-close cousin watch

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    My dad's sister's daughter and I were very close. She is 5 years older than me but we used to share a really close bond and she was practically my older sister. Till 3 years ago in April 2008.
    Though we were very close, she's always been a tad annoying. Always giving advice when it's not asked for, a bit headstrong etc. She had come over to our house( I was staying at home then) for the weekend. My parents, sister, her and me went out for lunch. During the lunch, my sister did something stupid and my mum understandably didn't take too kindly to it. Once we were back home, my cousin asks me ,'Why does your mother always seem to be in such a bad mood? It's very irritating and I think it's the reason your sister doesn't seem to have much self-confidence, because your mother never supports her'.
    Now, as close as I was to my cousin, I would never tolerate anyone saying anything like that against my mum, especially because it's not true. It was also not my cousin's place to say that even if she did feel so. I gave her a good piece of my mind, telling her to mind her own ****ing business and not to pass judgement. I also told her I didn't think I'd ever want to talk to her again, cos I couldn't talk to someone who spoke about my mum like that. Instead of apologizing, she went on about how I'd realise she was right one day and agreed to not talk to me again.
    It's been 3 years. We've had absolutely no contact. Do you think the wounds have healed? I sometimes feel we should talk again, especially considering how close we were. How do I go about reconciling with her?
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    To be fair it sounds like you over reacted, it may not have been right that she said something about your mum but she was sticking up for your sister. If those were her exact words then what she said wasn't that bad. I'm surprised you took it so far as to completely cut off contact.

    You could just contact her and ask how she is, although if my cousin tried to do this to me over something like that, honestly I'd be like 'gtfo.'
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    (Original post by KJane)
    To be fair it sounds like you over reacted, it may not have been right that she said something about your mum but she was sticking up for your sister. If those were her exact words then what she said wasn't that bad. I'm surprised you took it so far as to completely cut off contact.

    You could just contact her and ask how she is, although if my cousin tried to do this to me over something like that, honestly I'd be like 'gtfo.'
    It wasn't that bad? She was sticking up for my sister by indirectly accusing my mum of being a bad parent.
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    (Original post by fhatthewuck)
    It wasn't that bad? She was sticking up for my sister by indirectly accusing my mum of being a bad parent.
    But if your sister was suffering from low confidence, wasn't it better that it was highlighted rather than pushed aside just as to not offend your mother? No parent is perfect and just because your sister may have had a confidence issue doesn't mean your mum is a bad parent, by speaking up, your cousin was pointing something out that your mum could fix. Your cousin was just looking out for family, she might not have done it in the right way but at least she done it.
 
 
 
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