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I don't know if I have depression... watch

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    Keep as anon please.

    I'm in my first year at Uni, and have been looking forward to coming for years. I was really excited when I found my course, and though it was perfect for me. I've never been one for being homesick or anything, and I'm the one all my friends come to with their problems. I also don't like people to know when I don't live up to their expectations, and don't like my GP, he freaks me out a bit.

    In my first term, I developed insomnia. I'd never had trouble sleeping before, it's something my family always joke about. It meant I missed alot of lectures and stuff because I was sleeping during the day. I eventually went to the uni health centre and the GP there gave me a leaflet on insomnia and asked me to try out the things on it.
    Over Christmas my sleep went back to normal, but I had no motivation to do work or catch up, even with all my best intentions. And my grandma died.

    Second term, my insomnia came back. I tried nytol but it didn't work very well. This term there were more repercussions as my department had a different director of undergraduate studies, who was more involved. She seemed understanding, but told me that if I missed more of my compulsory lectures/seminars I'd have to be monitored and if there was no improvement I might get thrown out. This put even more pressure on me than I put on myself. I sometimes didn't sleep at all, and rarely went to my non-compulsory stuff. Then my nana died too.

    I have put weight on, my energy levels have gone, I still have trouble sleeping and no motivation. Turns out I missed a few compulsories that I didn't know about and today got a letter saying they werent putting me on the monitoring program because there aren't enough academic weeks left. That was a relief.

    I'd been thinking recently of trying to change my course and wondering if that was my problem. Now I'm thinking maybe that, and maybe the contribution of hOmesickness, grief and insomnia have led to some sort of depression. Im sorry fir the essay, just really wanted this out there to see if anyone could shine a light on the issue or help me out.

    I feel your pain. The move to uni is hard. I'm feeling very similar and I've put on about 2 stone since starting uni. But my advise is to make sure you get out daily and try your best to keep active...it'll help you out.

    Talk to your personal tutor at uni, talk to your GP. We can't help much, but they can.

    It sounds as though the combined effects of moving to Uni and two of your Grandparents dying has taken its toll on you. There is a difference between grief and depression, although the symptoms are very similar, so I would try different sleeping remedies, taking a holiday and coming to terms with your losses, then seeing what happens.
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