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    Basically i am going off to uni this year. i will either be going nottingham trent or hertfordshire.

    heres a little info on my family. my father passed away around 5-6 years ago and so it's only me, my brother and my mum. my brother is currently at hertfordshire (final year) and he lives at home but when hes finished he'll be moving out. now heres the problem, if i go to nottingham trent it means i'll have to move out too and if i stay at hertfordshire i can either decide to stay at home or live on the campus for the 1st year. i have this thought at the back of my mind that she'll be lonely and vulnerable if me and my bro move out. Shes only 47 so shes not that old, i don't want to leave her but at the same time i really want to move out and experience the uni life especially at nottingham trent. Plus i can still visit and once i finish i'll prob move back in for a bit.

    nottingham trent is also the better uni for my course. i really dunno what to do.

    my bro says shes a grown women and can take care of herself, eventually we'll have to move out etc.
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    I can see where you're coming from but I do agree with your brother - she is a grown woman and she knows you'll be moving out at some stage, I'm sure she'd rather you enjoyed uni life than stayed home with her. Why not have a chat about it with her? Just to put your mind at ease?
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    Your brother's true, but try talking to her about it. At the end of the day you can always visit like you said
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    I think it's really nice that you're thinking about your mum and her happiness, but I'm sure she would want to go where *you* want to. Of course she's going to be upset when you go, but she has time to prepare and knowing you're enjoying yourself and your happy is bound to help if she does feel a bit low. I would talk to her about it, I expect she'll reassure you that she will be fine but it'll be nice for her to know how much you care. You've always got weekends to go and visit as well!
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    (Original post by francistheswole)
    Basically i am going off to uni this year. i will either be going nottingham trent or hertfordshire.

    heres a little info on my family. my father passed away around 5-6 years ago and so it's only me, my brother and my mum. my brother is currently at hertfordshire (final year) and he lives at home but when hes finished he'll be moving out. now heres the problem, if i go to nottingham trent it means i'll have to move out too and if i stay at hertfordshire i can either decide to stay at home or live on the campus for the 1st year. i have this thought at the back of my mind that she'll be lonely and vulnerable if me and my bro move out. Shes only 47 so shes not that old, i don't want to leave her but at the same time i really want to move out and experience the uni life especially at nottingham trent. Plus i can still visit and once i finish i'll prob move back in for a bit.

    nottingham trent is also the better uni for my course. i really dunno what to do.

    my bro says shes a grown women and can take care of herself, eventually we'll have to move out etc.
    It's your life, do what you wan with it. I agree that this is a somewhat iffy situation and I wouldn't want to be in it either, but she's 47 man, she's a grown woman. You need to do what you need to do to make something of your life. If you want to go out and go to a different college (which I think you should) then go, you can always come back on the weekends or when you have breaks.
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    Personally, I would stay at home with my mum but that's because she's my best friend and we spend so much time together I know she'd be lonely if I left. How much time do you spend with her at the moment? How would this change if you move out? Does she have family and friends she can socialise with if you leave? What is her opinion? I think a lot of it depends on the answers to those questions.
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    thanks guys and yeh i guess ill have a chat with her about this.

    me and my mum aren't the best of friends but i really do love her, we don't spend much time together because she works all the time, she has friends which is fine but barely has time to socialise because she works all the time, but she goes to a few odd parties etc. she says if i go as far as nottingham trent if i run out of money she won't be able to send me money etc. ii'll prob just be more careful with my money anyways.
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    (Original post by francistheswole)
    Basically i am going off to uni this year. i will either be going nottingham trent or hertfordshire.

    heres a little info on my family. my father passed away around 5-6 years ago and so it's only me, my brother and my mum. my brother is currently at hertfordshire (final year) and he lives at home but when hes finished he'll be moving out. now heres the problem, if i go to nottingham trent it means i'll have to move out too and if i stay at hertfordshire i can either decide to stay at home or live on the campus for the 1st year. i have this thought at the back of my mind that she'll be lonely and vulnerable if me and my bro move out. Shes only 47 so shes not that old, i don't want to leave her but at the same time i really want to move out and experience the uni life especially at nottingham trent. Plus i can still visit and once i finish i'll prob move back in for a bit.

    nottingham trent is also the better uni for my course. i really dunno what to do.

    my bro says shes a grown women and can take care of herself, eventually we'll have to move out etc.
    I'd like to start by saying that you're an awesome person.

    Now that's out of the way, I strongly recommend moving into halls for your first year, regardless of where you go. You'll miss out on so much if you don't.

    Also, a piece of advice: On your very first day in halls, go out with your new flatmates, buy some alcohol and knock on every door in your block asking if they want to come to a party at your place. That's what I did in my first year, and now I have a horde of friends.
 
 
 
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