It's kind of weird to be posting about life problems here on TSR I guess, but lately I've just been so lost, and I don't know what to do anymore
Basically in my country you can do this thing where you go to university one year early, and I did that for Architecture (even though I had been in England before) so I have ASes but not A2s
And the courses here are way more intensive so it's been really hard to keep in touch with my friends, and also whenever I've had a bad day I'm kind of antisocial, like I just want to lock myself up.. so I've sort of lost in touch with them and even though some of them are back in the country for Easter holidays now I find it so hard to bridge the distance.. I feel so needy and awkward, but I haven't really made any new friends that I can talk to about everything
and I miss my friends so much, we were really close and things were so much easier then
I just feel so alone, and I feel like it will always be like this here in China, because I'm not used to the culture, and people sort of see me as an outsider because my chinese is crap and my sense of humour doesn't really fit in, and that i've made the biggest mistake of my life. And sometimes I see my old friend's photos on facebook and it makes me feel so sad and lonely... I mean when you put it like that it sounds so nonchalant but some days I-well I don't feel suicidal exactly but I wonder if there's a point to being alive at all, because my favourite part of the day is when I am asleep!!! I miss having a life so much. I miss being the one inside the photo having a laugh, rather than being a zillion miles on way seeing it on facebook, feeling left out and wanting to cry
And because I'm so messed up emotionally this year I am also having trouble with my studies.
So I am thinking of opting out... Taking a gap year and doing A2s maybe even SATs?
Except I can't really think of any other job I would want to do that much other than architecture... I want to do something cool and be stimulated everyday
And I talked about this to my parents, they are super disapproving, and say that I'm thinking irrationally and being driven by my emotions... It's all fine now to say I want a life now, but what if I got back to UK for uni and I still don't have a life? Or what if I end up doing a gap year, getting into a mediocre university for a course I like less and still not having a life, and then being an underachiever and hating myself for it?
And even if I decide to do a gap year, I will have to do A2s largely on my own, and I don't know if I can cope with another year of solitariness, and I don't know if it's possible to do A2s if you've alrady taken a year out, and I won't have advice on personal statements etc...
Please could you help? or maybe just offer some perspective? I feel so lost and helpless
Thanks guys, sorry for the length of this message.. .I mean I've seen this sort of post on TSR before, but I never thought it would ever come to this, for me, you know?
Help me please!!!
What should I do with my life? watch
- Thread Starter
Last edited by supergirl182; 06-04-2011 at 18:40.
- 06-04-2011 18:36
- 06-04-2011 18:38
If I could offer you one piece of advice, wear sunscreen.