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too ugly to live watch

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    I'm surprised at how similar we are. I'm the same and especially now I have an obsession with my teeth and how discoloured they are. It depresses the hell out of me, has done for a couple of years, but I'm finding that going to the doctors will be my best bet and save up enough money for safe teeth whitening.

    I used to look at the mirror constantly at least 5 times a day, scrutinizing each imperfection and making myself feel even worse, so it was easier just to avoid it completely. I get scared even passing a mirror publicly and get the whole anxienty issues too.

    Although I'm not the best person to give you advice since I'm currently experiencing it, the best thing for you, I and others on this are to follow TSR's advice and focus on your outlook first. You're clearly letting your insecurity take over your life, literally, but do you really want to be wasting your time feeling depressed about how ugly you look when you could be doing something productive with yourself and your life?

    There's always a way out of it and by the sounds of it, the most distinct insecurities are short term factors that could be easily treated. Like your skin has scars...they could be easily treated with a skin peel. There's not much you could do about the shape of your face unless you were to get facial surgery, but I could guarantee you'd end up going down a bad road of obsession and you'd end up wanting to maintain those same looks, maybe feeling dissatisfied with results or feeling artificial.

    Now think of the possibilities, not there's nothing I could do about this attitude. You need to start having control over yourself, your life. You could get rid of the 'scars' that this insecurity has embedded you with.

    I'd consult your doctor first and explain all the troubles you're having with your confidence and your skin. You need everything to be put into persepctive and start to look at the bigger picture and going to the doctor is the best start. Once you have the confidence and determination, start making alterations to your lifestyle like exercising more, continuing to eat healthy and taking up a new hobby and voluntary work - anything to make you feel worthwhile. Your lack of work is bound to put more emphasis on what might've not been such an issue before, so start by going to your doctor and think of what you could do to your lifestyle in order to make you feel confident like you might've been before. Good luck . If you need any ideas on what you could do, ask us, and sorry for the novel haha!
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    I understand to a degree what you are going through. I was once over 25 stones and I didn't want a gf or think I was capable of getting one (I wasn't disliked even though I was overweight and had been asked out, but declined due to how I felt), but then when I was about 19, I worked towards a goal and really went for it. A year or more on I trimmed off 13 stones and gained in confidence.

    I don't think you'd be as bad as you think you are, you just lack confidence in yourself and are probably just needing a pat on the back. As for not having a bf despite being 20, that's nothing to be ashamed of, I didn't get a gf till a couple of years ago but now I am engaged and for me, finding someone I loved and getting engaged to my the one I loved first was and still is a special feeling. So get your head up and you'll be all right .
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    (Original post by DM2011)
    I understand to a degree what you are going through. I was once over 25 stones and I didn't want a gf or think I was capable of getting one (I wasn't disliked even though I was overweight and had been asked out, but declined due to how I felt), but then when I was about 19, I worked towards a goal and really went for it. A year or more on I trimmed off 13 stones and gained in confidence.

    I don't think you'd be as bad as you think you are, you just lack confidence in yourself and are probably just needing a pat on the back. As for not having a bf despite being 20, that's nothing to be ashamed of, I didn't get a gf till a couple of years ago but now I am engaged and for me, finding someone I loved and getting engaged to my the one I loved first was and still is a special feeling. So get your head up and you'll be all right .
    That is inspirational I'm glad you pulled through it! I think that if you have a valuable partner they could do a LOT on building up your confidence and sometimes it's better going with someone you know you'll settle down with than having a line-up of all these short term partners!
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    (Original post by Steezy)
    I've got slight scars, but unless I go right up to the mirror, I can't see them, and they're not visible in photos. Maybe laser surgery would be best, which I see you've already considered... Do you drink green tea? It's amazing stuff and also decreases the visibility of scars I think.
    i drink white tea. its better for you then green
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    (Original post by ahoward)
    okay then, talk me through your routine, like what stuff do you use, and how do you do it through the morning and evening?
    i use simple cleanser and toner, because i suffer from slight Eczema and its the only thing that stops eczema flair ups. i use St ivers gentle scrub every two days as i have quite dry skin. i use simple daily moisturiser with uv filters. and i use olay night cream. i steam my face 1 time a week and add essential oils to it. and i use a mask about 3 times a week
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    (Original post by DanielleT192)
    I'm surprised at how similar we are. I'm the same and especially now I have an obsession with my teeth and how discoloured they are. It depresses the hell out of me, has done for a couple of years, but I'm finding that going to the doctors will be my best bet and save up enough money for safe teeth whitening.

    I used to look at the mirror constantly at least 5 times a day, scrutinizing each imperfection and making myself feel even worse, so it was easier just to avoid it completely. I get scared even passing a mirror publicly and get the whole anxienty issues too.

    Although I'm not the best person to give you advice since I'm currently experiencing it, the best thing for you, I and others on this are to follow TSR's advice and focus on your outlook first. You're clearly letting your insecurity take over your life, literally, but do you really want to be wasting your time feeling depressed about how ugly you look when you could be doing something productive with yourself and your life?

    There's always a way out of it and by the sounds of it, the most distinct insecurities are short term factors that could be easily treated. Like your skin has scars...they could be easily treated with a skin peel. There's not much you could do about the shape of your face unless you were to get facial surgery, but I could guarantee you'd end up going down a bad road of obsession and you'd end up wanting to maintain those same looks, maybe feeling dissatisfied with results or feeling artificial.

    Now think of the possibilities, not there's nothing I could do about this attitude. You need to start having control over yourself, your life. You could get rid of the 'scars' that this insecurity has embedded you with.

    I'd consult your doctor first and explain all the troubles you're having with your confidence and your skin. You need everything to be put into persepctive and start to look at the bigger picture and going to the doctor is the best start. Once you have the confidence and determination, start making alterations to your lifestyle like exercising more, continuing to eat healthy and taking up a new hobby and voluntary work - anything to make you feel worthwhile. Your lack of work is bound to put more emphasis on what might've not been such an issue before, so start by going to your doctor and think of what you could do to your lifestyle in order to make you feel confident like you might've been before. Good luck . If you need any ideas on what you could do, ask us, and sorry for the novel haha!
    thanks for the advice. i dont want to go to my doctors because quite honestly there are SH*T and i only changed doctors a year ago. wish i never changed 2bh. like i had eczema around my mouth and he didnt even look at it and just said it was 'dry skin' i went to a chemist and she confirmed it was eczema! there's lots of other stuff also. they wont be much help. i think i might try change doctors
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    never! think your to ugly to live because there is always someone out there who will like you for you plus i know for sure ur prob not ugly porb just self esteem is getting in the way like i said on another post was that everyone is pretty/good looking in their own way you just need to know how to bring it out in my oppinion i think no one is ugly and im not just sying that i mean it even peopl with deformities i think i beautiful and its got nothing to do with your outer appearence more whats in the inside ;P
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    thanks for the advice. i dont want to go to my doctors because quite honestly there are SH*T and i only changed doctors a year ago. wish i never changed 2bh. like i had eczema around my mouth and he didnt even look at it and just said it was 'dry skin' i went to a chemist and she confirmed it was eczema! there's lots of other stuff also. they wont be much help. i think i might try change doctors
    Yeah well it isn't exactly compulsory for you to go to the doctors but it's strongly advisable, especially if you could get a better doctor. Things can only get better ! You'll have to follow our advice though, otherwise the problem will be ongoing.
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    (Original post by DanielleT192)
    That is inspirational I'm glad you pulled through it! I think that if you have a valuable partner they could do a LOT on building up your confidence and sometimes it's better going with someone you know you'll settle down with than having a line-up of all these short term partners!
    Thank you .

    In terms of confidence, mine has shot up to no end, but it hasn't gone up to the level where I forget my humility and such. I think though that "anonymous" has every reason to believe in herself and it would take that one spark or one person to set her into motion.

    In any case, if you lack confidence in your doctors ability to help you, change back to your old one if you can, but if you have Ezcema then possibly try baby oil as from personal experience, it helps .
 
 
 
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