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    Herr - how come Emilie didn't want to come to the UK for a trip? She must really love Switzerland!

    Anonymous - I'm so sorry for your loss. Of course this is the right place to post about it *hugs*


    My news : Jason is doing my head in! That is all! lol
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    Hi,

    I'm after a little bit of advice from you wonderfully experienced people.

    I am, quite possibly, the broodiest person on the Earth. I've been this way for years... but it's gotten past the OMGILOVEBABIESSOMUCH stage to the more sensible.. I really think I am ready for children some time very soon, stage. Which is ultimately way more dangerous I think.

    The only problem is I have only just completed my first year of uni with 3 years to go and I honestly do not think I can wait that long. :/

    A bit of background about myself. I'm in a very stable relationship of over two years. My boyfriend and I live together (and have our very own fur-baby). I'm 23 (so an old fart by uni standards) and have never not had a job since the age of 15. I also currently have the implant as I couldn't trust myself not to "accidentally" forget to take my pill - yes, that's how broody I am. It's bad.

    I know I can't be the first person to have thought about all this... and I'm positive there are many who have gotten pregnant/had children whilst at uni.. I guess I'm after some advice as to how feasable it is. Also, i'm sure most who do get pregnant at uni don't plan it all out as I seem to be doing!!!

    I've kind of gotten it in my head that I can get pregnant in X month and then be due on X month and have the baby right in time for my ridiculously long summer break of 5 months, have some time off and then go straight back to uni. Everyone thinks I'm crazy. I think I'm crazy. But somehow, I don't care that I think I'm crazy because I really really just want to start a family. Of course I know that in reality .. pregnancy won't happen like you plan it to and that if we decide to let us try and I miss my time window i'll be extremely disappointed and either a) carry on anyway or b) spend the next year being very upset about it.

    The BF is open minded. The age old arguement of "can we really afford this?" is there... and he's also sceptical about uni etc etc but we're both in a place where we want a family. Uni is the only thing in the way. Also, My boyfriend is self-employed and therefore makes up his own hours so that makes things a little better for us & Next year I'm scheduled only 2 1/2 days actually IN uni...

    Am I mental? Can it be done? Should I be locked up somewhere where the walls are fuzzy and warm?

    Sorry for the rant. I hope you've managed to make sense of this. I'd really love to hear from someone who has been through pregnancy at uni etc.

    Much love.
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    I'll be honest, it'll be easier for you to finish uni without having a baby to look after. That's not to say it can't be done, it can, balloon_parade is a testament to that, but it's easier without, naturally.

    I personally started uni in Sept 2004, got pregnant in Jan 2005, finished first year in Summer 2005, had baby in Sept 2005.
    Took that year off then from uni, and went back to uni in Sept 2006 in first year of a new course, when my daughter was a year old.
    Then...
    got pregnant in Nov 2006, finished first year of new course Summer 2007, had baby in August 2007.
    Took the following year off from uni, and went back into 2nd year of new course in September 2008 (when my daughter was 3 and my son was 13 months old).

    I lasted until the beginning of November 2008 and then quit uni completely. I just couldn't cope. My son was extremely clingy and he wailed the place down when I had to go to lectures, and was totally unconsolable until I returned. He's still a little clingy now if I'm honest, and he's nearly 5 years old now!

    If it had just been my daughter though, I think I would have managed. As I say, balloon_parade has done uni with 2 children. Other people find that even 1 child is too much to cope with whilst studying. It really varies, you can't predict how these things are going to turn out.

    One piece of advice that I will give you though, is that if you do go ahead with TTC whilst at uni, I think it's a little ambitious to expect that you'll be ready to go back to uni when your baby is only 5 months old. I'd be looking at taking the year off if I were you and going back when your child is a toddler and a little more independent.

    At the end of the day it's your choice. It can be done if you're very very organised, but if it were me I'd wait until after uni. I regret not having been able to finish my degree, though obviously I wouldn't change my life as I love my kids, but if I could have had my cake and eaten it too, I would have done my degree and THEN had kids. Hindsight is a marvellous thing. (I went on to have a third child in Sept 2009 as well, but my uni days were obviously a distant memory by that point!)
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    Thank you that's exactly the kind of thing I wanted to hear. I'm still totally undecided, of course.. but it's nice to hear a little of each side. I don't know if I want someone to tell me it's completely impossible or totally feasable.. I guess I just thought that you guys would be the best to relate to.

    I'd like to think I'm very resilient and could do it .. but then you have to consider all the things that could go wrong I guess. A very good friend of mine has a very poorly son with major congenital heart problems and if something even remotely serious should be wrong with the baby then of course I wouldn't cope with both illness and uni.

    I consider time a big problem for our situation though. My partner is a fair bit older than me .. and I know men aren't so restricted on time etc etc.. but I just feel like now is the time. I don't want to give up uni or the prospect of a family. Arggggg. I hate being conflicted.

    Thank you very much Pink.
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    (Original post by LadyAz)
    Thank you that's exactly the kind of thing I wanted to hear. I'm still totally undecided, of course.. but it's nice to hear a little of each side. I don't know if I want someone to tell me it's completely impossible or totally feasable.. I guess I just thought that you guys would be the best to relate to.

    I'd like to think I'm very resilient and could do it .. but then you have to consider all the things that could go wrong I guess. A very good friend of mine has a very poorly son with major congenital heart problems and if something even remotely serious should be wrong with the baby then of course I wouldn't cope with both illness and uni.

    I consider time a big problem for our situation though. My partner is a fair bit older than me .. and I know men aren't so restricted on time etc etc.. but I just feel like now is the time. I don't want to give up uni or the prospect of a family. Arggggg. I hate being conflicted.

    Thank you very much Pink.
    I guess the best thing to do is talk it through with your partner and try and get it planned, whatever you want to do. It's tricky though as you'd want a summer baby but then you might be sitting your exams pregnant! (I think I'd aim for a July/Aug baby :cool: ) You've just got to do what is right for you! I think if I were you I'd perhaps think about taking a year out and then you've got your lovely mummy time but then an ultimate goal of going back to uni. Especially as it's your first, a baby is a huge body/life/culture shock, no matter how prepared you think you are! We've all thought 'oh it's can't be that difficult' and then got there and been like...'it so is'

    An undergrad degree with a baby is less work than a full-time job and a baby. I always think that (especially when it gets tough!) You will end up with lots of time off and work you can do when the baby is in bed. Sure it's pretty exhausting but parenting is any way! It is also much easier if you've got the support network, my husband, our families and friends are all lovely and will always step in to help..so that's also important (which it's why it's important to take a year off - or at least go to some parent/baby groups, so you can meet other mums in the community and build up a little support network!)

    Just make your own choice as a couple and take it from there! No-one can really help you make your choice, just support you with the decision you make.
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    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    Herr - how come Emilie didn't want to come to the UK for a trip? She must really love Switzerland!
    A rather eventful trip it was, not looking forward to going home to get on the weighing scales Been having a Ben & Jerry's Cookie Dough ice cream almost every single day plus all the binge eating of stuff I haven't had access to, you really never appreciate something or some practices until you no longer have easy access to it.

    But been a good trip, managed to help pack up everything that needed packing and got rid of everything that the granddad didn't want to bring along. I will miss that house as it is the one that all through my life had remained constant since nothing in it had ever changed since 1972 when it had its last renovation. He is now going to move back to the house that he spent his younger days in. LOL also found some photographs of me as a as a 5 year old trying to remove a car tyre as well as one extender handle which was used for painting that in my younger days I used it to smuggle food out of the house to one neighbour girl who didn't have a lot to eat.

    Emilie, she is rather afraid of coming to Britain as a whole which is part of the reason she has fear of being brought to airports in Switzerland as she seem to think airport = going to Britain. She is rather afraid of the ex and for some reason or another she equates coming to Britain as she needs to remain with the ex.

    She didn't quite enjoy her trip, sadly she was mostly afraid or in fear the whole time as she clung on to my parents or made sure she was always in the same room as them. The toughest part was the visiting centre where the extended visit wasn't easy on her. She didn't say much to her mother, mostly a one word answer type thing or she would turn and ask me whether we could leave yet.... anyway it is out of the way now, I told the ex it would be in Emilie's best interest that I don't bring her to Britain again.

    My parents took both the kids back to Switzerland on Monday as they thought Emilie being in such constant fear wasn't good and they weren't convinced that she would grow out of it, I didn't want to argue with them, they said she went back to normal the moment they arrived and LOL apparently she told the passport control officer she was very happy to be back in Zurich and never wanted to leave. It turns out she also tried to hurry them out of Zurich airport and kept pulling them towards the train stop even before they got their baggage out. Interesting when I drove them to Heathrow she didn't show any signs of being afraid of being near an airport like she normally did in Zurich.

    I guess she does love her life in Switzerland since my OH plus her mama tends to care for Emilie quite well and they tend to understand her a lot more due to the nature of their work that involves children. Also she has her friends here who she can click with quite well from her playgroup and also around the neighbourhood. Also my OH has 2 nieces who comes by to our house regularly and they are the same age as Emilie.

    Anyway tomorrow is her birthday, my OH organized a clown plus a bouncy water slide at her playgroup yesterday and had food catered for it.... bwah and she sent me the bill but not the credit
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    (Original post by LadyAz)
    Hi,

    I'm after a little bit of advice from you wonderfully experienced people.

    I am, quite possibly, the broodiest person on the Earth. I've been this way for years... but it's gotten past the OMGILOVEBABIESSOMUCH stage to the more sensible.. I really think I am ready for children some time very soon, stage. Which is ultimately way more dangerous I think.

    The only problem is I have only just completed my first year of uni with 3 years to go and I honestly do not think I can wait that long. :/

    A bit of background about myself. I'm in a very stable relationship of over two years. My boyfriend and I live together (and have our very own fur-baby). I'm 23 (so an old fart by uni standards) and have never not had a job since the age of 15. I also currently have the implant as I couldn't trust myself not to "accidentally" forget to take my pill - yes, that's how broody I am. It's bad.

    I know I can't be the first person to have thought about all this... and I'm positive there are many who have gotten pregnant/had children whilst at uni.. I guess I'm after some advice as to how feasable it is. Also, i'm sure most who do get pregnant at uni don't plan it all out as I seem to be doing!!!

    I've kind of gotten it in my head that I can get pregnant in X month and then be due on X month and have the baby right in time for my ridiculously long summer break of 5 months, have some time off and then go straight back to uni. Everyone thinks I'm crazy. I think I'm crazy. But somehow, I don't care that I think I'm crazy because I really really just want to start a family. Of course I know that in reality .. pregnancy won't happen like you plan it to and that if we decide to let us try and I miss my time window i'll be extremely disappointed and either a) carry on anyway or b) spend the next year being very upset about it.

    The BF is open minded. The age old arguement of "can we really afford this?" is there... and he's also sceptical about uni etc etc but we're both in a place where we want a family. Uni is the only thing in the way. Also, My boyfriend is self-employed and therefore makes up his own hours so that makes things a little better for us & Next year I'm scheduled only 2 1/2 days actually IN uni...

    Am I mental? Can it be done? Should I be locked up somewhere where the walls are fuzzy and warm?

    Sorry for the rant. I hope you've managed to make sense of this. I'd really love to hear from someone who has been through pregnancy at uni etc.

    Much love.
    It also depends on what you're going to be reading at university, not all courses are created equal and some unis are harder than others. I reckon if you are going in for something like medicine having a baby is going to be suicidal.

    Also many things change, heh you sure your partner will always want to look after the baby "just because you need to go to uni." No matter how supportive one appears to be, it should never be taken for 100% face value. No such thing as "he works his own hours" even if you are Warren Buffett or Bill Gates.
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    Herr - aww poor Emilie bless her. I hope she had a good time at her birthday party.

    Right then lovely people of the P&P Soc - I'm having a Summer party at my house on 4th August. Would any of you like to come? Kiddies invited too of course x
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    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    Herr - aww poor Emilie bless her. I hope she had a good time at her birthday party.

    Right then lovely people of the P&P Soc - I'm having a Summer party at my house on 4th August. Would any of you like to come? Kiddies invited too of course x
    Are your neighbours invited to the party?

    Emilie is back to normal now, yes she had a good birthday party and seems to have forgotten about her ordeal in Britain, thankfully. My OH is rather POed at me for bringing Emilie to Britain when it was rather clear that E didn't want to go..... but then what was I supposed to do I guess I won't bring E again to Britain until she says she wants to go.

    Won't be seeing the kids for 2 weeks, I'm travelling this week and next week, already in Hong Kong now and will be in China later this week. My OH is taking care of both of them 24/7..... let's see if that cures her broodiness once and for all... getting tired of her talking about having a baby.
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    (Original post by Herr)
    Are your neighbours invited to the party?
    hell no lol
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    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    Herr - aww poor Emilie bless her. I hope she had a good time at her birthday party.

    Right then lovely people of the P&P Soc - I'm having a Summer party at my house on 4th August. Would any of you like to come? Kiddies invited too of course x
    Ooh sounds good! I am always looking for things to do at weekends! You don't live far from DH's parents!
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    (Original post by Herr)
    Are your neighbours invited to the party?

    Emilie is back to normal now, yes she had a good birthday party and seems to have forgotten about her ordeal in Britain, thankfully. My OH is rather POed at me for bringing Emilie to Britain when it was rather clear that E didn't want to go..... but then what was I supposed to do I guess I won't bring E again to Britain until she says she wants to go.

    Won't be seeing the kids for 2 weeks, I'm travelling this week and next week, already in Hong Kong now and will be in China later this week. My OH is taking care of both of them 24/7..... let's see if that cures her broodiness once and for all... getting tired of her talking about having a baby.
    You live such a well travelled life! It must be tricky with the whole ex situation, you seem to be handling it really well. Let us know how your OH gets on looking after your brood!
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    (Original post by balloon_parade)
    Ooh sounds good! I am always looking for things to do at weekends! You don't live far from DH's parents!
    yay!

    I'll pm you my address. Time is yet to be arranged but it'll be afternoon xx
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    (Original post by balloon_parade)
    You live such a well travelled life! It must be tricky with the whole ex situation, you seem to be handling it really well. Let us know how your OH gets on looking after your brood!
    I wish I was travelling for fun. This time round Hong Kong nearly the entire day I been sitting at an exhibition booth, China isn't for fun either meet up with 1 chinaman after another all hell bent on squeezing every bit of money out of me LOL. Sometimes I wish I had trained to be a civil servant / teacher like my OH whose job is so much easier.

    The situation with the ex is under control for now and as for as long as she remains locked up things should be fine.

    My OH, she is surviving the 2 brats rather well, so much so she even told my parents they need not come take them if they were busy. Had a video call with them yesterday, the elder one was telling me not to come home but to not forget to send her her pocket money. Alas she hasn't changed her mind on wanting a baby..... I told her no or at least not until the youngest one is 3 years old. Will see how this goes... hope she changes her mind by then.




    On another news, this Thursday I'm meeting with my 16 year old. She was 5 the last time I saw her and that was the 1st time and only time I ever saw her, I doubt she has any recollection of me. Will be meeting them in Birmingham, I don't really know much about her other than she hates me as she has some preconceived ideas in her head on who I am.
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    (Original post by Herr)
    I wish I was travelling for fun. This time round Hong Kong nearly the entire day I been sitting at an exhibition booth, China isn't for fun either meet up with 1 chinaman after another all hell bent on squeezing every bit of money out of me LOL. Sometimes I wish I had trained to be a civil servant / teacher like my OH whose job is so much easier.

    The situation with the ex is under control for now and as for as long as she remains locked up things should be fine.

    My OH, she is surviving the 2 brats rather well, so much so she even told my parents they need not come take them if they were busy. Had a video call with them yesterday, the elder one was telling me not to come home but to not forget to send her her pocket money. Alas she hasn't changed her mind on wanting a baby..... I told her no or at least not until the youngest one is 3 years old. Will see how this goes... hope she changes her mind by then.




    On another news, this Thursday I'm meeting with my 16 year old. She was 5 the last time I saw her and that was the 1st time and only time I ever saw her, I doubt she has any recollection of me. Will be meeting them in Birmingham, I don't really know much about her other than she hates me as she has some preconceived ideas in her head on who I am.
    You have a 16 year old daughter!? She's your age when you conceived her.

    I'd love to have a 16 year old personal assistant daughter.
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    (Original post by Dirac Delta Function)
    You have a 16 year old daughter!? She's your age when you conceived her.
    Yes.
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    I've got a 16 yr old too, well he will be in a couple of months anyway.At that age they can be quite obnoxious!!.
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    (Original post by Annie72)
    I've got a 16 yr old too, well he will be in a couple of months anyway.At that age they can be quite obnoxious!!.
    Well looking back when I was that age I wasn't exactly an angel either...LOL

    Either way one thing for sure......... my bank account is about to get smaller
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    (Original post by Herr)
    Well looking back when I was that age I wasn't exactly an angel either...LOL

    Either way one thing for sure......... my bank account is about to get smaller

    Yes your bank account is definitely going to get smaller .Girls just love shopping!!.
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    (Original post by Annie72)
    Yes your bank account is definitely going to get smaller .Girls just love shopping!!.
    Maybe I should do what a lot of British parents do, let their 16 year old kids find their own way :devil: since she was born in Britain and grew up in Britain she should have no problems accepting that I'm sure my parents would probably skin me alive if I did that though.

    But will see what she and her mother wants...... hopefully not too much as my bank account is small enough as it is.


    How's everyone doing? All is well I hope and hope no one has been affected by the on-going floods.

    Just checked in for my flight and headed to Britain again.

    Anyone made plans yet for the weekend?
 
 
 
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