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    (Original post by madders94)
    Sorry, that was me - posted as anon by accident
    In my honest opinion, it kind of sounds to me like you want the baby then. If the only issue here is your parents' support, which it seems to be, then I would say keep it. Talking to more people is a good idea, but just remember that this is an incredibly personal decision and it's not one that other people should be able to talk you into or out of.

    You're young, but there are positives to that as well. (I'm 23 and planning baby number 1, though admittedly I am in a very stable financial position for somebody my age).

    A couple of benefits:

    • Having kids early means you don't have to take time out of your career in your 30s, i.e. when you're in management positions and you can't afford to take time out.
    • You've got more energy and you'll live to see them into a good age
    • You may well find that childcare and uni combine relatively well - whereas when you have a kid later, you'd most likely take maternity leave and then go back to work when the kid is 1. This kind of sucks, imo, because you miss half of them growing.


    Anyway, these things obviously depend on your circumstances, but I think it's worth considering that people like your parents who are only judging this decision on your age are really just taking common practice and convention and turning it into a rule - which it isn't. There are positives to having kids early, just as there are positives to having them later. it's totally up to you which one you do, and it doesn't make you some teen pregnancy case study just because you start young.

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    Hi, is this thread fairly active? I can't remember if I have posted on here before or not. I don't think I have. Anyway I don't know if any of you recognise me from the Mental Health Support Society - I post there pretty much all the time.

    I'm a 23 year old music student from Dorset. I live with my partner of almost 5 years and have a 7 week old son called Scott Harry. I don't get on with normal pregnancy forums because of all the stupid abbreviations and *****ing. Seriously, a DS is a games console and I really can't read FTM as "first time mum." And what's with calling everyone "dear?" To me it just sounds sarcastic so I can't take them seriously.

    So anyway I thought I'd give this thread a go. Story below for those who want to know.

    Spoiler:
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    In April this year I found out that I was 27 weeks pregnant. Due to various medical reasons the pregnancy hadn't been spotted until then. I have an anxiety disorder and chronic depression, and things reached crisis point at the beginning of July, at which point I was hospitalised at a mother and baby mental health unit. At the unit I was diagnosed with dysthymia.

    My son Scott Harry was born on 20th July after a 35 hour labour, at 7lb5oz. He was back-to-back and the epidural wasn't much help. He is now 7 weeks old and has just started smiling. It's a really bumpy ride with my mental health issues - I'm seeing a community nurse on the perinatal mental health team and get loads of support from my amazing partner, and my dad who comes round every day. I'm in the process of finding out whether I have any other mental health issues, possibly borderline personality disorder.


    I just thought I'd introduce myself. Hopefully I can get to know some of you and offer as much support as I can to those who need it.

    *

    Madders, I would say do whatever you and your partner feel is right. In a way you are lucky that you have the time to decide what to do (at least in my skewed view!) Your parents are worried for you, but I would say the above poster is right, you sound like you're not in the worst position to have a child... I mean look at me! Yes, life will change but at the moment with my son I can only see it having changed for the better. I hope I helped and I'm sorry if I'm out of line in any way. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
    • #12
    #12

    (Original post by HmMusic)
    Hi, is this thread fairly active? I can't remember if I have posted on here before or not. I don't think I have. Anyway I don't know if any of you recognise me from the Mental Health Support Society - I post there pretty much all the time.

    I'm a 23 year old music student from Dorset. I live with my partner of almost 5 years and have a 7 week old son called Scott Harry. I don't get on with normal pregnancy forums because of all the stupid abbreviations and *****ing. Seriously, a DS is a games console and I really can't read FTM as "first time mum." And what's with calling everyone "dear?" To me it just sounds sarcastic so I can't take them seriously.

    So anyway I thought I'd give this thread a go. Story below for those who want to know.

    Spoiler:
    Show
    In April this year I found out that I was 27 weeks pregnant. Due to various medical reasons the pregnancy hadn't been spotted until then. I have an anxiety disorder and chronic depression, and things reached crisis point at the beginning of July, at which point I was hospitalised at a mother and baby mental health unit. At the unit I was diagnosed with dysthymia.

    My son Scott Harry was born on 20th July after a 35 hour labour, at 7lb5oz. He was back-to-back and the epidural wasn't much help. He is now 7 weeks old and has just started smiling. It's a really bumpy ride with my mental health issues - I'm seeing a community nurse on the perinatal mental health team and get loads of support from my amazing partner, and my dad who comes round every day. I'm in the process of finding out whether I have any other mental health issues, possibly borderline personality disorder.


    I just thought I'd introduce myself. Hopefully I can get to know some of you and offer as much support as I can to those who need it.

    Madders, I would say do whatever you and your partner feel is right. In a way you are lucky that you have the time to decide what to do (at least in my skewed view!) Your parents are worried for you, but I think it would be wrong to let them influence your decision so drastically.
    Thanks I remember reading a thread you made I think, glad to hear tha your son is healthy and you've got good support

    I'm on mumsnet because they've been giving me good advice but gave up on netmums... so many acronyms and stuff it's so confusing!
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    Arghh anon keeps coming on automatically :mad:
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    HM welcome to the society

    I must admit I do use the abbreviations sometimes, but sparingly I've been on tons of pregnancy / parenting forums over the years so it sort of becomes a habit. I'll try not to overdo it on here though lol.

    Our babies are nearly the same age Mine is 9 weeks tomorrow.
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    I'm taking Nathan to the docs in 20 mins. Having a cold for 3 weeks is not normal. His immunisations have been postponed until next week.
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    oh by the way there IS a link to the abbreviations on the old thread. But true enough nobody uses them much here.

    http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=669414
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    I totally agree with the DS/DD/DH things. I mean, I wouldn't call them my 'darling' something in real life... makes me cringe a bit!
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    Thanks everyone, I hope I can find a bit more support here!
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    (Original post by madders94)
    If my parents were being supportive, I'm fairly sure I'd want to keep it absolutely, but I can't be sure if that's just because if they were being supportive, they wouldn't have made me look at it realistically?

    We managed to discuss it today with no angriness or "you definitely can't do it".... just a warning of how much things will change, which I already know it will change... can't imagine the extent, but from what I've read, no-one's ever completely ready for a baby so :dontknow:
    You have to do this for yourself, it's your life. In this situation, most parents become supportive once the child is born or even towards the end of the pregnancy. Perhaps, as now there is a chance they CAN influence you then they will. They are only thinking of the best for you at the moment but ultimately, it is still up to you.

    Nobody is ready for a baby, nobody and that's fine, there is nothing wrong with that!
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    My youngest daughter (and possibly our last child, not decided on any more yet!) had her first day of school yesterday, where has the time gone? It's actually rather scary that time can pass so quickly!
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    I've just spent far too long reading through that link to the old thread. Cute babbies.
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    (Original post by balloon_parade)
    You have to do this for yourself, it's your life. In this situation, most parents become supportive once the child is born or even towards the end of the pregnancy. Perhaps, as now there is a chance they CAN influence you then they will. They are only thinking of the best for you at the moment but ultimately, it is still up to you.

    Nobody is ready for a baby, nobody and that's fine, there is nothing wrong with that!

    I couldnt agree more
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    (Original post by Kater Murr)
    I've just spent far too long reading through that link to the old thread. Cute babbies.
    Same here, what a blast from the past. I hate reading old posts I've made, feels so cringey!
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    So, guys...

    What do you all remember as your earliest pregnancy symptoms then?
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    lack of period lol


    by the way would anybody like a ready-made 6 year old boy? lol
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    #13

    How soon after conceiving can pregnancy symptoms appear?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    How soon after conceiving can pregnancy symptoms appear?
    depends which pregnancy symptoms you're referring to.

    Tender breasts can be early on. Missed period obviously. Morning sickness can be around a couple of weeks after period would have been due. Feeling tired...

    here's a link :

    http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnan...ncy.aspx#close

    Obviously things like feeling kicks, having a visible bump etc. these things all come later (unless you've already had kids, in which case the visible bump is a lot earlier, but kicks still won't start until you're in your 2nd trimester).


    OH btw Kater - that's one thing I forgot to mention when replying to your last question. Tiredness. Before I found out I was pregnant with Nathan I was falling asleep all the time. Couldn't understand why I seemed to be so unbelievably shattered.
    • #8
    #8

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    How soon after conceiving can pregnancy symptoms appear?
    I was first getting them about 10 dpo (whoops - days post ovulation! ) & interestingly while the home urinary pregnancy test was still negative - but chance of false negatives reasonably high because I did test days before my period was due. So convinced (metallic taste in mouth & a few random but really intense waves of nausea) that I bought a different brand, did it on a first morning sample & got a positive the next morning!


    I also mostly lurk on Mumsnet - lots of abbreviations admittedly, but it's quite snarky & not all 'hunning' everyone!


    PMP - Is baby ok? I was going to say see GP as 3 weeks does seem long.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    How soon after conceiving can pregnancy symptoms appear?
    I conceived around August 2nd (LMP was around 23rd July so I'm at about 7 weeks now).

    First symptoms that showed up were about two weeks after conception - extreme tiredness, being off certain foods - I went off chocolate - and sore boobs.

    Then obviously missed period. Then two weeks after that the symptoms were nausea, more tiredness, just wanting to eat carbs all the time... bread, toast, pasta, anything... and I thought I had a UTI, but did a test just to be safe. Sure enough, 6 weeks pregnant :eek:

    So I'd say two weeks maybe?
 
 
 
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